There and back again

November 27, 2007

I finally made it to the town of Siguatepeque and I think I at long last can spell the name correctly. Due to bad weather, traffic, and further delays last Friday it was almost dark when we reached the town. I settled in with the Visser family and that evening met a few of the teachers from a nearby Bilingual School.

Saturday dawned a beautiful day with not even the threat of rain in the sky. I spent the day up on the high ropes course of Camp Cerro de Luz. I was on the ground most of the day (which turned out to be better since I could not reach the cables above me for changing my static belay from one cable to the next), but I got to climb once and that was good. The day held more waiting though as the group was running behind schedule. I filled some of the time with some tag games with the Visser children and another leader. Much to my surprise I ended up seeing someone I had met several months ago in the city and family of friend from Costa Rica.

Saturday evening I hung out with the teachers from the Bilingual School and realized how small the world is once again when one of them turned out to be a Houghton grad. The entire weekend I was with Canadians and British which was neat. Sunday morning I went to market and church with the teachers and afterwords we, and the Vissers, did a hike in a nearby National Park that overlooks the Lake Yojoa. For seven months I have been trying to do a real hike and finally it happened -- and with fun people. I was glad to be with both a family and with young people once again because it has been a while since I have been in either setting.

Monday morning I visited a National Forestry school on the edge of town and found book on trees that I have been searching for for many months. I worked the rest of the day and then this morning, I was able to do some more networking with the director of the camp and get some input on a few things.

The trip back to San Pedro this afternoon was great. I had beautiful weather and decided to stop along the lake for a snack so that I could sit out on the water. Although I am a little short on sleep now, the weekend was quite restful. I got to do a run on back roads that reminded me a little bit of runs with the cross country team in college. With the sun just beginning to set behind the mountains, it was the perfect time and place to run. I contemplated why I am afraid to run on the roads around my camp when I did not hesitate to run in that unfamiliar area, but then I remembered that the only road by my camp is either straight up the mountain or downhill into town. There is no even ground.

Tomorrow morning I head back to Manantial de Vida which is long overdue. I have been gone about a week and a half and I can tell. I plan to spend the majority of my time there this next week, except for a quick trip to the city this weekend for a concert, church, and a basketball game. I am about to venture back into the world of competitive sports. We will see how it goes. Enough of my rambling

The Folding and Unfolding of Plans

November 22, 2007

Thanksgiving Day. This morning I kept forgetting what day it was in the States because I was working here. This afternoon though I headed to a missionary's house where 26 of us gathered for a very authentic Thanksgiving meal. It was not the same as being with family, but it was a good time. I only wished that I was feeling more up to eating the good food.

This evening I had plans to pick up another missionary from the airport and then drive to a camp several hours away where I was going to visit the family and their ministry. I figured that these plans were more solid than my plans earlier in the week, but no not really. The missionary's wife called me to say that the plane had been delayed because of snow (which was of course difficult for me to imagine on a day that feels like summer). So the new plan is to leave tomorrow in the morning. Driving during the day is wiser anyway so it is probably all for the better.

Yesterday I did take a short day trip with the pastor and his wife but we got left around 1:00PM instead of 11:00AM and therefore ran out of time to actually get to the Ecological project on the mountain. We did a very short hike to a waterfall and walked around a park that had a few animals. Eating lunch on a cliff above the water while listening to the crashing waves and watching pelicans gathering for their own feast out a ways, was refreshing. I, as usual ordered chicken, since I do not like fish. The pastor and his wife both ordered fish though. When my grilled chicken arrived I was surprised to see that it was breaded and very different in appearance from the chicken I had the day before. But nonetheless I started eating it and did not think much about the taste until the pastor pointed out that I had his fish and he my chicken. It was a disappointing realization because it meant that I had been eating fish without realizing and I "hate" fish. Another mark to emphasize that it is more in my head than anything else. The fish that the pastor's wife had though was another story. Too much work to de-bone a fish and have to look at the eyes and teeth while eating. I will stick with my chicken.

What will the weekend and trip to the camp hold? I have no idea. I will not worry about making too many plans because it will all change anyway. In a few days I will add a few pictures from the various trips.

Pase lo que pase...

November 21, 2007

Happen what may happen ... . That was the perspective I had this past week as I prepared for a mini-vacation with the pastor an his family. Several weeks ago we had talked about visitng an Ecological project on a nearby mountain and also taking a few days of vacation because they would like to get to me better. Last week when I saw the pastor I briefly asked if there was plan yet, and he said no but that they would figure something out. On Sunday he told me that we would leave Tuesday after the staff meeting. So yesterday I had a bag packed that would prepare me for where ever we might go but in reality I had my doubts about whether the trip would happen. When I asked May, the pastor's wife, what the plan was after the meeting, she did not know and in the end the trip had been forgotten. I did have a brief get-away in that the family, myself, and 3 women went to a restraurant up on the coast. One of the women is a Honduran missionary headed to Argentina for camping ministry so it was a good connection to make. I was glad to see the coast after having been here almost 7 months and not yet ventured that far north.

The new plan is that today mid-morning we will take a day trip up to the project. I am not sure if we will still take in a canopy tour (which had been another part of the plan) or not. My personality is such that I like to have a plan and tend to ask questions until I know for sure that a plan is in place. I followed culture a little more this time and nothing happened. I am disappointed to an extent, but I also did not have my expectations so high as to expect that yes, a trip would happen. Learning to adapt is a forever process I think. I do have a plan for traveling this weekend to another camp for a visit and networking and that plan is much more likely to happen which is good because I am ready for a change of scenery and schedule.

An Orchestra Outside The House

November 19, 2007

Today I have had reminders of home. I just heard that they had a little bit of snow in Lancaster early this morning. While dropping off some missionaries at the airport, I saw some Mennonites and decided to go over and talk to them figuring that they just might know my relatives. I knew that there was a children's home down here where several of my second cousins have been. Sure enough, one couple was from PA and both couples know my extended family. It is a small world!

The other reminder of the north -- well, tonight I have a chorus of frogs sounding loud songs in the "pond" on the street. They bring back memories of hearing the croak of bullfrogs many a night in the little pond outside my house at Black Rock. A heavy rainfall this afternoon converted the street back into a pond and within hours the frogs arrived. Where they were the past several weeks I do not know but apparently they decided that there was sufficient water to warrent their return. Between the frogs, the dogs, and the rain it has not been a quiet evening. On Saturday evening the noise came from fireworks that sounded as if they were being set off just behind the house. Conversation was nearly impossible with my friend who was visiting.

Several days ago as I journeyed to the city I pondered whether it was legal to pass a police car (pick-up to be exact) in a no passing area since they were going 30mph. I did not risk trying and waited until I had a dotted line. Not much later though I saw a police car doing the passing in a no passing zone so I think that I have my answer. This evening as I was driving home well after dusk in the middle of a heavy rain I saw another police vehicle and this one still did not have its headlights on though it was clearly dark outside. I guess that they do not pull you over for that either. Very little seems to be enforced that should be. But I do know from experience that they pull over people who went the wrong way on a street because there were no signs within sight designating the direction of travel. It does not matter if they have only been driving for a week in Honduras. In reality I think it all depends on how the police feel on any given day. One could be fined for something that the police do themselves. This morning I went to get license plates for my car since I only have a temporary one and I was told that they are not making the metal ones right now. Thankfully I was spared having to stand in line for several hours waiting for that very answer. The next time I get stopped at a checkpoint I hope that the police do not act so surprised that I do not have real plates since there is nothing I can do about it at the moment. But we will see because one can never tell what will happen.

When will I ever learn?

November 12, 2007

The words of a Peter, Paul, & Mary song that my sister would sing came to my mind as I thought back on the past two days, only in the song it was "When will they ever learn?" I am back in the city having arrived this afternoon so that I do not have to leave in the wee hours of the morning for an 8:00AM meeting. I headed out early this evening for basketball practice which is supposed to start at 6:00PM. I intentionally left late because I am always the first one there and then have to wait around. I brought a book just in case and sure enough no one else was there so I busied myself reading, "Uncle Tom's Cabin" (more thoughts on that later). Finally around 6:26 I decided to call and see if practice had been cancelled. Yep, it was raining so there was no practice. I did not ask the logic of the situation but it probably has to do with driving in the rain at night. It definitely should be avoided when at all possible because the darkness and dimly lit streets already make potholes hard to see but combine it with heavy rain.... not a good story.

What am I not learning? Well, I keep skipping a good morning run because I expect to play soccer or basketball later in the day. I need to take advantage of the opportunity to exercise when I have it. One of the staff girls, Andrea, has faithfully gotten up the past 3 mornings to run. Once it was only she and I, and I was impressed with her pace. Today I heard the children's loud voices across camp as they participated in some game or make believe. I often wish that I could go back to the carefree days of childhood where the main goal of the day (at least during the summer) was to have fun. Yet I know that I would never be content to return. And according to my sisters, I would have been curled up with a book and not one of the one's running through the woods. In my opinion, it would have depended on the day and the book. But I do have plenty of memories of the night games with sisters and -- hiding in the ferns, dashing madly across the yard, and yelling for help from base. (I think that I did actually yell in those situations. For some reason that capability has escaped me for the most part in these later years).

My work this morning took me outside but not for the most glamorous of jobs. I finally decided that it was time to get to work on the compost pile. The area has been highly neglected and somehow lots of trash got thrown on the pile and has been sitting there for much too long. So I grabbed a shovel and some bags and got to work. The job would have gotten done much quicker had I used my bare hands or gloves (which I do not have) to pick up the trash but I could not bring myself to get that dirty. Partly decomposed food which has not been properly composted does not have the pleasantest of smells nor is it the most sanitary. In the compost area cantaloupe vines, tomato plants, and papaya trees have all been growing because we have not been mixing the compost. I really do not know that much about composting and have been trying to do some research especially for how to make it work in the open during rainy season. I think we have to cover the area but first the trash needed removed. As I worked at it, I could not help but think of all of the children around the world who live in garbage dumps or pass much of their time there searching for "treasures" for survival. What I consider completely disgusting and avoid touching, they dig through with bare hands and then eat with those same dirty hands coming in direct contact with their food. I know that I need to relax a bit on my perspective of "dirt." I wanted to think and pray while digging around in the muck, but it was one of those times where the mind stays rather blank. At least the job is done and hopefully I can educate the rest of the staff enough that plastic trash will not end up over there.

One last thought before closing. As I mentioned, I am reading "Uncle Tom's Cabin" a literary classic that somehow I passed over during my school years. What I find interesting and challenging about the book is that the author does not allow the reader to merely read and pass judgements on "those people who owned slaves" but she asks questions that cause one to evaluate their own life and walk, especially as a Christian.

A Saturday at camp

November 10, 2007
So all day yesterday I was planning for a day with no power as is typical on Saturdays at camp and we have power! It has almost messed up my schedule though not really. This morning I really had no desire to go for a run even though it was a beautiful morning for it but at 6:45AM I heard the sound of voices outside and saw the staff children there. They were ready to go running. This past week was their last week of classes till February and they are celebrating by wanting to run. Children are amazing! We set out on a jog around camp. I tried to give a few pointers on running since it is quite new for them. Perhaps we can have our own little x-country team before too long. One lap was enough for them so we stretched and eventually parted ways. They plan to meet up with me again tomorrow. I should have kept running in order to get some exercise but my plan was to finish mixing up Banana bread and a Carrot-Coconut bread before the electric went off at 8:00AM.

As I mentioned it never went off and I did not use the hand mixer anyway so it would not have mattered if I ran longer. I have realized though that maybe I am supposed to give up baking . My original plan had been to bake the banana bread while I was in the city but there was no baking powder. Last night as I was preparing to bake, I tried out my oven to be sure it worked and it did not. So this morning I carried the gas tank down to the Williamson’s house and set out to cook there. Though the oven lit, the smell of gas remained quite strong and I felt like there was a leak. I baked anyway and opened all of the doors, doing my reading outside and entering only occasionally to check on the bread. At one point 15 minutes passed in between my checks because I was talking to a guest and the temperature (which fluctuates without warning) rose drastically in that time so part of the banana bread got rather burnt. Such is baking here I guess.

Reflections on friendship

November 8, 2007
The cooler weather has finally reached Honduras! Yesterday when I left the house around 8:30AM it was 67F which is quite cool for us. True with the cooler temperatures comes the price tag of lots of rain, but for now I can enjoy and accept both.

So, I borrowed a little book called Dewdrops on Spiderwebs the other week and began reading it. The title captivated me and the fact that it was composed of various essays that are reflections on life. As I am reading it I have discovered that I can identify a lot with the writer, who was a single missionary in El Salvador. The reflection the other day included this statement, “If there is no room for suffering in my life, there is no room for joy.” The writer talked about the pain of having good friendships and then having to say goodbye to those friends. The friendships brought joy but also pain. Friendships are gifts from God that cannot be hoarded. She writes that often we have to let go in order to receive God’s provisions one day at a time. Close friendships often in the end reveal loneliness because they reveal God's invitation to a relationship with Him.

I have been thinking about all of this since my trip to PA a month ago now. Before going, I was at the point where I was ready for some fun moments with family and friends and also some deep conversations. The time there was awesome for that. I came back to Honduras feeling more refreshed and entered into the next few weeks with new energy and new opportunities. I had found a basketball team and some new potential friendships and outreach there. Several of my friends made an effort to contact me about getting together, rather than I having to initiate everything.

As the weeks have slipped by though, I realize that not much has changed. It still takes such an effort here in the city to get together with people. I made some efforts, such as to go hiking but lack of communication, directions, and then the rain ended that plan. I think that one of the challenges is that conversations, activities, and such rarely just happen here. They take work. I do not have enough daily contact with people for things to happen spontaneously – except at camp. And I am beginning to wonder if maybe I should invest more of my time and energy to really building my strongest friendships with the women at camp even though we are worlds apart in everything but age and faith. These past few months have caused me to really evaluate friendship, what it is, and what my expectations are. Perhaps for too long I have acquainted activity and doing with friendship. Maybe I need to be more content to just chat and sit still though my personality and energy level do not lean in that direction. Maybe I need to be looking for the people who could use a new friendship right now and some encouragement. Maybe I need to expand my definition of “fun.” I do keep meeting people, for example a girl from Costa Rica at a Bible Study this past week, in whom I see a potential for a friendship, but I also do not want to spread myself too thin by trying to maintain too many friendships with a bunch of people who I have to visit with one by one and therefore not very often.

These are all random thoughts that are still not sorted out but I know that tasting dear friendships again brings joy but also pain because the goodbye comes with it. So I am thankful for the time I had in PA, but still trying to discern where and how to invest my energies into friendships here.

Responding to poverty

More and more as I spend time in the city, I am faced with the question of how do I respond to the poverty around me? Nearly every intersection on the main roads, hosts one or more people who walk from window to window asking for money. Some have physical disabilities, some are elderly, and some are young children. So often I find myself thinking, "Can't you find some other way to make money?" "Just because you are injured, does not mean that you cannot work... " and so on. But then I realized that what do I know about Honduras and the way things work here? Perhaps there really is no job for the elderly or those with disabilities. Maybe the only way for them to survive is to stand on the street corner. I come from a background where an emphasis was put on working hard and finding a way to get by. Yet I have never really been in need and have no idea how I would respond if I was in desperate need for even food. If I could not find a job, perhaps I would hold out my hand seeking money too.

Although I do not like to hand out money, I am thinking I need to find a way to respond to the people who are begging around me. I do not think that Christ would have kept his window rolled up and door locked, pretending not to see the needs beside him. He would have at least listened to their story. I want to find a way to acknowledge each one as a person, created and loved by God. Maybe that will be just talking and smiling with them for the moment, maybe it will be sharing some food, and yes maybe even giving some money upon rare occasion. Other times it might be praying for the person even with the window still rolled up. I certainly do not have the answers yet, but I know that I want Christ's love to be evident in my response even if that means taking a risk or two. Prayer and sensitivity to the Holy Spirit in each situation will be key

From the depths of a toaster

November 7, 2007

It's amazing what can instill fear or moments of panic. This evening I ate dinner late (if you could call it dinner) after returning from a church service. Having been slightly sick the last few days, I decided I should probably eat something simple like toast. The house I am staying in here in the city has a toaster, so I removed the towel from over it and put in my bread. Because it had been covered with a towel, I figured that probably nothing was inside, so I did not look. A few minutes later I heard the pop of the toast being done. (And about that time I sent the banana I was cutting, flying to the floor) Before I could head to the counter and retrieve the toast though, I heard a rattling noise. The sound immediately made me think of an animal trapped somewhere. Glancing around I saw no animal so I looked with fear at the toaster. I knew that it was probably a mouse and though I do not hate mice (rats yes) I am never looking for opportunities to either hold or kill them.

Gingerly I picked up the toaster, quickly removed the toast, opened the door to the carport, and then dared to look inside. Much to my surpise (considering the amount of noise that escaped from the toaster), what I saw inside was a fried gecko. It took a few minutes for me to decide what to do with it. My initial thought was "the trash can", but then I remembered fermaldahyde and regretted that I did not have any here in the city. I quickly remedied that problem by popping the gecko in the freezer until I can take it to camp and better preserve it there. I even managed to get it in a container without having to actually touch it. Thankfully I am the only one in the house for the next few days so no one should be startled when looking through the freezer.

As for the toast, I ate it anyway. And I wonder why I am sick? Later I found a dead ant in my granola which was in an ant-proof container. So much for even trying to protect my food.

I think that from now on I will stick to my toaster oven at camp where you can clearly see if anything is trying to hide out.

Freedom to walk again

November 3, 2007
And so a long week comes to an end and with it, I finally have a vehicle. I was going to take a picture to post it on my blog, but it has been raining all day so I will have to wait until later. It was pretty much 6 months to the day after my arrival here in Honduras that I bought the car. On Tuesday morning I left camp early in the morning to make it to the government office that deals with changing car titles by 8:00AM. Once there I stood in line for several hours. Thankfully a couple of people helped me out along the way or I would have been in the wrong line (again) for a couple of hours. I already had not so fond memories of that building. After those few hours, I went to the bank to pay for the title change and write a check to the car owner. Then I spent the week getting new tires, insurance, and doing several other small repairs that still needed done. I am hoping that I can avoid sitting in the waiting room of car repair shops for several months now at least. It is a great feeling to have my own vehicle again. I now own a 2002 Isuzu Rodeo for those interested in such details. Definitely the newest car that I have ever had. To get insurance here, you have to drive a fairly new car. After talking with the insurance person on Wednesday, I realized that I am not sure how valuable insurance actually is because they do not cover any incident where you do something contrary to the law, such as run a red light, speed, go the wrong way on a one-way street, etc… It seems to me that most accidents are caused by breaking the law though hopefully unintentionally. In this city it is quite easy to go the wrong way on a street since they are not well marked.
As I have been driving around the city this week I have pondered the driving patterns here and my own driving. There were several lights that were out one day and there was very little rhyme or reason as to who went when. In reality everyone was trying to go and hence getting in each other’s way so that no one could go. I am not sure what would have happened had it been the States except that the police would probably show up since it was a major intersection. Another time I decided to stop as I approached the light that had just turned yellow. I was already braking when I realized I should have kept going because the car behind me was still coming at a very fast speed. It simply went around me and blazed through the intersection on red, heedless of the fact that cars were beginning to turn left in front of it. Although the law would say to stop, I was causing more danger by braking quickly in a country where running red lights is pretty acceptable. It is a challenge to learn how to drive safely in a city where most people do not seem to respect the laws and yet also follow the laws as much as I can.

The Freedom to Walk
November 3, 2007
Friday morning I took the Patrol in for maintenance before it sits for several months until the Williamson’s return. Because the shop was not too far from where I am living, I decided to walk home. It was 8:00AM so not the hottest time of the morning. In fact the sky was more threatening of rain than anything. I walked, well aware of my surroundings, keeping a crisp pace in the areas that were less populated. For me though, it is always a blessing to be able to walk again. As I neared my home the rain came in the form a heavy mist. Thankfully I arrived home not too wet.When it came time to pick up the vehicle late in the afternoon, I once again could not bring myself to pay for a taxi when I am in need of exercise anyway. So I walked back. Like a good mother, the housekeeper where I am staying warned me to behave myself as I walked and not talk to the boys.

The biggest danger in walking was probably getting hit by a car since several of the roads lacked sidewalks, but I survived without any close calls. All in all I think it was a 5K round trip which makes me wish I had run it to make it more like a x-country race from years ago.

I have a car...

November 3, 2007
And so a long week comes to an end and with it, I finally have a vehicle. I was going to take a picture to post it on my blog, but it has been raining all day so I will have to wait until later. It was pretty much 6 months to the day after my arrival here in Honduras that I bought the car. On Tuesday morning I left camp early in the morning to make it to the government office that deals with changing car titles by 8:00AM. Once there I stood in line for several hours. Thankfully a couple of people helped me out along the way or I would have been in the wrong line (again) for a couple of hours. I already had not so fond memories of that building. After those few hours, I went to the bank to pay for the title change and write a check to the car owner.

Then I spent the week getting new tires, insurance, and doing several other small repairs that still needed done. I am hoping that I can avoid sitting in the waiting room of car repair shops for several months now at least. It is a great feeling to have my own vehicle again. I now own a 2002 Isuzu Rodeo for those interested in such details. Definitely the newest car that I have ever had. To get insurance here, you have to drive a fairly new car. After talking with the insurance person on Wednesday, I realized that I am not sure how valuable insurance actually is because they do not cover any incident where you do something contrary to the law, such as run a red light, speed, go the wrong way on a one-way street, etc… It seems to me that most accidents are caused by breaking the law though hopefully unintentionally. In this city it is quite easy to go the wrong way on a street since they are not well marked.

As I have been driving around the city this week I have pondered the driving patterns here and my own driving. There were several lights that were out one day and there was very little rhyme or reason as to who went when. In reality everyone was trying to go and hence getting in each other’s way so that no one could go. I am not sure what would have happened had it been the States except that the police would probably show up since it was a major intersection. Another time I decided to stop as I approached the light that had just turned yellow. I was already braking when I realized I should have kept going because the car behind me was still coming at a very fast speed. It simply went around me and blazed through the intersection on red, heedless of the fact that cars were beginning to turn left in front of it. Although the law would say to stop, I was causing more danger by braking quickly in a country where running red lights is pretty acceptable. It is a challenge to learn how to drive safely in a city where most people do not seem to respect the laws and yet also follow the laws as much as I can.