Feeling Trapped

January 10, 2009

If I have not mentioned it before, my car has been having troubles. (Actually I think I did refer to a few of the problems earlier today). When I first opened the car on Wednesday morning after being gone for not quite 3 weeks, I almost died because of the smell that escaped from inside. Everything was covered with mold! I could not believe how disgusting it was. Since I did not have the time nor the equipment for doing a good cleaning, I took the car to a nearby car wash. Thankfully with the coconut air freshner that I have inside, it smells much better.

But their is a greater problem that has confined me to my house on this Saturday evening when I wanted to take a drive and see how the apartments I am interested in look at night. You can getter a better glimpse of the kind of neighborhood and how well lit things are if you drive by at night. Early evening, just after dusk, I took two friends to their house and noticed that once again one of my headlights was out. Really it is not burned out, the connection just get loose when the car jostles, which is frequently on these roads. As I drove home from their house, the other headlight suddenly went out too (I think I hit a bump). I had to turn my bright lights on to make myself seen and to see the roadway myself. Once at home I wiggled the wires around and got the left light back on.

A few minutes ago I decided to leave and check out the apartments and also be ready in case my one friend called and had a little time to get together. But as soon as I pulled out of the garage, both lights went out. And I could not get the hood open (a frequent problem also this week) to do any jiggling. I think that I am about ready to turn my car in for something new with no problems. The problem free life would not last long enough to make it worth it though. I think that there are a few too many challenges happening all at the same time and so my attitude is not the best at the moment. I think that I had better take a few minutes to do some introspection and ask the Lord for help. As Evelin said to me this morning, I am feeling discouraged. And it is for her sake too that I also feel discouraged because I do no know what these next few weeks hold for her, considering her decision to move back to Progresso. The words of Isaiah 30:15 come to mind as I think of how I need to trust her life and mine (car included) to the Lord. "In repentence and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength." So I will go be quiet and listen.