An Unknown Journey with a Known God

The End of the Year

2011-12-24T08:52:00.001-08:00

December18, 2011

Ido not even want to know when the last time was that I blogged because I knowthat way too much time has passed. I had hoped to keep my blog more up-to-dateas I returned to the United States, but that has not happened.

Lifehas been busy but good. I am one day away from completing an Early ChildhoodEducation class at an area community college that ended up being required forwork. I look forward to being done with that and with the assignments that wentwith it.

Overthe past few months I have gotten more accustomed to work at Mom’s House. Istill have a lot to learn but I have passed through the season of inspectionsand turnover in moms and soon the Christmas season. Christmas is a busy timebecause many churches and organizations generously donate gifts to thefamilies. On Tuesday we will have a Christmas party and give out those gifts onbehalf of others. The families can then take them home and open them onChristmas Day which will help out the moms because they will not have to buyother gifts that they cannot really afford. Over the past few months I have hadthe opportunity to get to know the mothers on a deeper level and ask questionsof them to help them think and consider the potential obstacles beforeembarking on an idea. I have gotten to share stories with them to also helpthem to think from a new angle. And then there have been the opportunities topray with individual mothers during moments of stress and/or crisis. As newmoms come in with this new year, I expect that I will get to establish some newrelationships and hopefully to encourage the women in the Lord.

Backpacking At Last

2011-09-20T18:37:00.000-07:00

I find myself in the midst of busy times. Though I kept a slower pace during my first few months back in the country, life has sped up. And somewhere along the way, I forgot about making time for blog posts. So many times I think about it, but I do not get there. It is not even that fun or exciting things or God stories are not happening, it is a matter of priorities. This past weekend I went backpacking in the Shenandoah National Park with four friends. We had a great time and started out with a pretty clear plan, but the circumstances of the day (Saturday in particular) led to changes -- Plan B & C. On Friday we hiked in to a beautiful campsite that boasted a nearby swimming hole and waterfall. It was too chilly to consider swimming but the view was great. We cooked our dinner near the water. In the park you are not allowed to build fires so we had to use a little camp stove. It meant early to bed since there was no light to really visit by. A small group had wandered into the camp after we did and ended up camping just up the hill from us. Thankfully it did not turn out to be as loud of a party as we had expected and I slept fine. My biggest disappointment in their presence was that the extra hole I had dug that evening for the next morning (when in the woods backpacking, you have to dig your own latrine which is often a time consuming process) was right by their camp which means my efforts to plan ahead were in vain because I was going to have to dig another hole in the morning. I found myself frustrated with this fact and the realization that my well-laid plans had been in vain. I was reminded of how in life I like to plan ahead and I do not like when unforeseen events mess up my plans. I can put way too much stock in my way of doing things. It was good to ponder this realization a bit and recognize that I need to grow in the area of flexibility. I must also recognize that God can at any point change my best laid plans because they may not be His plans. ("Your ways are not my ways says the Lord" -- Isaiah 55) Needless to say I was delighted when the group packed up early and moved out, making it possible for me to go and find the hole that I had dug. So all of my worrying was also in vain which is another good lesson.Because it was raining Saturday morning and we only had 3.5 miles to hike, we stayed in the tents until about noon. Then we decided to have lunch and move out. We soon discovered that the camp stove was not working and in looking at the skies we were not sure if the rain would continue all day or not. No stove meant no more hot food. More rain would mean wet feet for some of the group. We decided to change up the route and take a trail that would mean less hiking on Sunday and also put us near a campground in case we could not find water. The hike that day was nearly all up hill and we had to take one step at a time, sometimes focusing on using a rest step. By the time we were ready to set up camp, there was no site to be found. And so we walked into the campground to ask around. In the end the lure of bathrooms and the option of building a campfire captured us and we set up camp there for the night. Two of the group hiked out to bring the car over which was not far away. I never realized what a luxury campground camping is. We could store the food in the car so there was no need for setting up a bear bag. No digging holes. No packing out the trash. It was a good evening and delicious meal over the fire.On Sunday we sat around and played some games or journaled and read. I was disappointed that I did not get in more journaling throughout the trip but at least I had some down time for it. Around 11am we headed out to pick up the second car and then go our separate ways after a lunch that we did not have to cook. Overall it was a very good trip and though it was not physically relaxing (carrying 35-40lbs on your back rarely is) it was refreshing to be out in God's creation with friends. Life at work has been busy as I balance several challenges at work: finding temporary help to cover a vacant position, figuring out how many moms and children we can bring into the program, taking a college course to work towards director's credentialing, and trying to keep my hours close to just 32 per week. Overall though it is good and I am thankful to be working at Mom's House. This fall I have also picked up some hours at Cherry Crest Adventure Farm as a Maze guide. My first shift was interesting since I was still learning my way around and people would stop me and ask me for directions. Thankfully I had other guides to call upon when I felt like I would be the "blind leading the blind". All in all it should be a busy fall. Oh, and when I have another moment I will have to share some answers to prayer as far as housing and how things are going as I look to do foster care in the near future. For now though I need to take care of a few forgotten tasks.

The Happenings

2011-09-04T05:08:00.000-07:00

September 3, 2011

Life has been pretty busy for me of the past month. I had a week off in August but I ended up working at Black Rock for quite a few days and spent time driving around Maryland and Pennsylvania visiting some Honduran friends who were vacationing up here. I enjoyed showing my one friend around Lancaster, ending with a tour at Herr’s Potato Chip Factory. The season of working at Black Rock has pretty much ended up now I will be working quite a few Saturdays at Cherry Crest Farms in the Corn Maze. That should be a fun new adventure. Hopefully I will find time to move when that comes around.

Work at Mom’s House has been good though I am still just getting lots of things figured out. I am always thankful for the moments when I get to talk and pray with the moms and encourage them. Just this week I realized that the Life Coaching courses that I took were useful because as I talked with a mom and asked her some perspective altering questions she was able to see e of her current situation from a different angle. There are times though when I am at a loss as to what to say or do to best encourage the moms. Thankfully the Lord is strong in my weaknesses and can shine through.

I have continued to spend a lot of time with my adorable nephews. Taking my nephew Jack to Splits and Giggles (an ice cream shop in town) with my dad for his second birthday was a lot of fun. He apparently loves ice cream because he finished his kiddie cup and then wanted some of ours. Jack is talking more and more which is also fun.

All in all as I look back on the summer, I am thankful for being here in Lancaster and enjoying time around family.

From Clouds to Answers

2011-09-04T05:06:00.000-07:00

September 3, 2011

At long last I settle in to play catch up with blog entries. Yesterday morning I was returning home around 7:45am and I happened to notice the clouds swirling overhead. It was a mesmerizing sight because the clouds seemed to be like waves in the ocean, rolling and merging into one. I felt like I could have stared at them and gotten lost in them forever, but that would have made driving hard so I did not. Yesterday’s view as well as various sunrises and sunsets have reminded me again and again of God’s awesome power and majesty. I am very glad to serve Him.

This week I have also experienced several answers to prayer from the work of His hand. At Mom’s House I have been wrestling with the issue of capacity based on the number of staff that we have. There is a demand for more spaces for children in many of our rooms but because of our staffing, we cannot take on any more moms and children. Earlier in the week I received a call from a college student who has volunteer hours to do for her Social Services major and she wondered about helping at Mom’s House. Yesterday I interviewed her and was delighted to see that she looks like a very good fit for us and us for her. The other answer to prayer is not a definite answer yet but regardless of the outcome it has reminded me of God’s power to make a way where I least expect it. I recently began the search for an apartment again because it is about time to move so that I can be available for foster care later this year. Monday and Tuesday I looked at 3 apartments, all of which had potential, but at least one or two drawbacks. I would like to live in the city so that I have the option of walking to work, especially on the snowy days, but at the same time I do not necessarily want to deal with the street parking. The one place I looked at was in Millersville which had the benefit of being just down the street from my sister and her family and my garden. As I shared with one friend about the pros and cons of the apartments she told me that she feels like the right place will come up without all of the issues. Later that same evening I received a call from my sister saying that one of their apartments was unexpectedly opening up if I would be interested. So on Thursday evening I went and looked at the apartment and it seems almost perfect. In the city, off-street parking, two good sized bedrooms, a nice layout, and good landlords. The couple living there is not positive that they are moving because it depends on whether their offer on a house is accepted, but it is very likely. If they do not, I will have to check to see if the other apartments are still available. But if they are not, I have complete confidence that God will open the right door.

Thirty Second Entry

2011-07-31T19:27:00.000-07:00

July 31, 2011

When I saw (or thought I saw) that I had not written any blog entries in July, I decided that I needed to do one this evening even though I would love to be asleep. So this will be a whirlwind summary of the month with the hopes that in the following days, I can do a better catch up of life here in Lancaster. July has been a month of family time as I have spent a lot of time over at my sister's house helping with the new nephew and my older one. They are both adorable, by the way! I have spent quite a few Saturdays at Black Rock Retreat working on the Ropes Course. This past Saturday was particularly fun as I was able to work with a group that is headed out on a mission trip next week. It was an honor to be able to help prepare and encourage them.

At Mom's House I was busy with staff out sick and/or on vacation. I was able to interview a couple of new mom's whose children have started or will start with us in this coming week. Several of the moms during the initial interview expressed their desire to grow spiritually and so it is exciting to know that I will have more freedom to share with them. One of our moms has been going through a particularly difficult time as two of her five children have some serious health issues. The one underwent surgery this past week and is not recovering like they had hoped so she may have to return to the hospital. The mom is a Christian and has been grateful for our prayers and support. Thankfully she does have a church community to stand behind her too but she is juggling so many responsibilities and challenges right now that my heart goes out to her. Please pray for that family.

Other events of the month included mountain time, giving Spanish lessons, my first Barnstormers game (thankfully I did not have to watch much of it -- I supported the Black Rock stand by helping with the bearded dragon), and I cannot remember what else. So that is the longer than 30 second version but then again, I can never write only thirty seconds worth of information anywhere. :)

Celebration & Settling In

2011-06-20T20:09:00.000-07:00

July 5, 2011

Today is a day to celebrate because my second nephew, Calvin James, has entered the world. I am waiting for his older brother to wake up so that we can go in and see the new baby. Jack has been lots of fun to hang out with over the last few months that I have been back in Lancaster. Whether it is pushing him in a stroller for 3 miles while I jogged up in the mountains, splashing each other with water, watering the garden, or just receiving hugs, I love being a part of his life. It is nice to be an aunt who is close by.

In other areas of life, I have been settling in to more of a routine here in Lancaster. I am enjoying life in the city and the 1.2 mile walk to and from work most days. This week I actually have off because Mom's House closes twice over the summer months so I guess I will have to look for some other exercise on the days when I do not play basketball (of course hanging out with Jack might suffice depending what we do). I have been at Mom's House for one month now and for the most part things have gone well. I have begun to do interviews with potential parents to help fill some of the open positions in the children's rooms. The other week I was able to do an interview in Spanish which was quite fun. I hope to use Spanish on a more regular basis at work. I still have lots of orientation videos to watch and files to go through but little by little I am finding my way through the various facets of my job. Next week I begin a Food Safety Course to give me more preparation for being in charge of the kitchen.

I have continued to meet the moms who are in the program and try to begin getting to know them. I have been impressed with the dedication of many and the desire they have to move forward. Sometimes I have a pre-conceived idea of who they are or where they have come from but justlast week the Lord reminded me that I cannot judge. I do not know the stories and even if and when I do, God is the judge and I am not. I am called to love the people who I come in contact with and point them to Jesus. More often than not, my pre-conceived ideas are wrong and the stories that I encounter hold pain and tears. Thankfully God is in the business of mending hearts and lives!

Another Reason to Be Thankful

2011-06-20T05:34:00.000-07:00

June 18, 2011

While driving here in the mountains with my family, I was reminded of a sight from a week or two ago in Lancaster. I was sitting at a stop light by Lancaster Shopping Center and I noticed the two people in the car behind me communicating with each other through sign language. I pondered the situation because I realized that once they started driving again, it would be very hard to communicate. The driver would not have her hands free to sign nor could she always be looking over at her passenger’s signs. I suddenly realized how blessed I am to be able to both speak and hear, thereby making conversation possible while driving. I take it for granted but really should not.

I Stand Corrected

2011-06-10T18:49:00.000-07:00

June 10, 2011

I thought that I should correct a statement I made in the previous blog. I said that there are no current volunteers at Mom's House and that is not true. I have not met many but there are apparently a few that come fairly regularly. Today I was surprised to learn that two volunteers were at Mom's House looking for a job to do. Since there were only 2 children in, there was not a big lunch to prepare but thankfully the volunteers were willing to clean. I quickly realized that I need to familiarize myself with all of the jobs around Mom's House so that when someone shows up unexpectedly, I know what to tell them to do and where the needed supplies are. This morning was a juggling act because I was also helping one of the moms figure out her new cleaning job and trying to get some things done in the office. I have fifteen hours of training videos to watch too so I probably should start on them soon.

This evening I attended an International Fundraising meal for a friend who will be heading to the Czech Republic later this year. The wide array of ethnic foods was great but also the fellowship. I realized how important networking is as I shared with some others what I am doing. One girl works as a Prison Chaplin and so she daily encounters women who may need help moving ahead and even getting back to school. We live in a small world but a world that can be made even smaller as we work together with others to share the love of Christ and proclaim His as Lord.

New Beginnings

2011-06-08T17:16:00.001-07:00

June 8, 2011

Life has a way of ticking by and my blog entries go unwritten. I have decided that tonight I will write though because I promised that I would keep my blog up to date. One week ago today I began my job at Mom’s House of Lancaster. For those who do not know, Mom’s House is a pro-life ministry that provides free childcare for single parents who are still in school be that high school, college, nursing programs, or a vo-tech school. The motto is: “Choosing life should not mean choosing poverty.” I realized my first day there that I do have a lot to learn but thus far it has not been overwhelming. I am overseeing the daycare and staff, the volunteers (none at this point), the parents involvement (including their service hours and parent group), and the kitchen. One of my first tasks was to come up with the menu for June.

Because I have been going through files and trying to figure out the capacity of the daycare and how many more children we should bring on for the summer, I have not gotten to spend lots of time down with the children. There will be times when I fill in and cover one of the three rooms: Pre-K, Toddlers, or Infants. I did make it out to the play and garden area my first day on the job and rejoiced with the children in walking through the sprinkler. That was the same day that I covered down in the infant room for a few minutes and had time to read a book entitled, Snow. I loved the conclusion of the book which was, “I like snow!” The children helped their teachers and some volunteers plant a garden in one area of the little “yard”. I will be excited when we can harvest the fresh vegetables to serve to them for lunch.

On Friday when I met the Administrative Assistant she felt like she knew me from somewhere. We eventually figured out that I had led Mom’s House staff in teambuilding activities at Black Rock Retreat five and six years ago. It is a small world! There seems to be a great staff in place which is always a good thing for any organization. I know that I have a lot to learn from each one of them. As September approaches I will be preparing for the parent groups with all of the parents of Mom’s House. Every Tuesday we will meet for an hour and I will bring in resource people as well as lead at times the group time. Little by little I have been meeting some of the parents but many are on break over the summer so their children are not back in until August.

Last weekend I moved into the city with Kendra and so I am getting use to that. I still have not heard Spanish outside on the street in front of my window which has been disappointing. On Tuesday I walked the mile to work and I plan to try to do that regularly. Tomorrow might be a little miserable come afternoon if it is as sweltering as today but since it is street cleaning day on Queen St. where Mom’s House is, parking is hard to come by without walking anyway. I notice much more when I am walking such as places to rent, a Spanish Christian bookstore, and tucked in gardens. My goal is to walk as much as possible and leave my car sitting.

I am very thankful for both my job and current place to live. They are both a blessing. I know the housing is just for a season but it will be a good season.

On The Receiving End

2011-06-08T16:22:00.000-07:00

May 26, 2011

Yesterday I had a blog post brewing in my head but till I got home to record it, it was too late to do anything. The day was a very good day with quite a few unexpected joys. These past few weeks I have been visiting with different friends across the State and yesterday I ended up visiting my former neighbors at Black Rock Retreat who are now in a nursing home. I did much more listening than talking but it was a good time. On Tuesday I met with a friend, Kendra Denlinger to explore the option of renting from her for a few months there in Lancaster. After a good conversation, I decided to walk to the Lancaster County Library Book Sale which was happening on F & M College Campus, not too far away. I set out with only my purse. The sale ended up being on the other side of campus and further than I had expected. I arrived there and was delighted to find some books that I figured I would have to buy new or on Amazon. Since this was the half price on all books day, I felt like I had found a goldmine. The problem is that when it comes to books, I love to read and have them on hand or even have some to give away. And so when I left the sale I had a large box of books with me and a ¾ mile walk ahead of me. I ended up walking through the college campus so that I could stop frequently and put the box down. There is nothing comfortable about carrying a large box for a long distance.

When I finally left the campus and started down the sidewalk, a uniformed young man on a bicycle stopped to ask me if I needed a hand. I really hate accepting help, especially when it was my fault that I had the heavy box, but I decided that if he wanted to help, I would not say “no”. And so he left his bike and carried the box the next 5 blocks for me. Apparently there are neighborhood security patrols in that area of town who ride around looking for ways to help people out whether that be aiding a stranded motorist or a young woman who bought too many books for 50 cents. I was thankful for the help and returning to my car, I headed off to pick up some free furniture. A woman who use to live in the area and do foster care was getting rid of furniture and was glad to pass it on to me for my future home with foster children. I rounded up some help to go and pick it up and of course it took longer than I had planned. Just before returning my dad’s work van to his house, it stopped working in that it had no power steering and though it turned on, there was no power to move anywhere. I had to leave it at my brother-in-law’s apartments and of course the next day when my dad checked it out, it was fine. I am not sure why I frequently encounter such “problems” with cars.Overall it was a day of unexpected help which was a blessing.

Traversing the Back Roads & the Raging Waters

2011-05-04T11:36:00.001-07:00

May 4, 2011

I love backroads and so travels in northern PA and western New York are always fun. I am up in my old home area of Houghton College. On Sunday I shared at the church I had attended while in college and spent some time with a family there. Since that time I have been visiting friends and professors around Houghton. The weather has not changed much since college in that it is still rainy and dreary but at the same time beautiful. Yesterday I decided that I was just too close to Letchworth State Park to not go over and see the falls. With all of the rain over the last few weeks, the falls and the river itself were a raging torrent. I stood above them and looked down, mesmerized by the power. One slip or accidental fall into the water would be the end. There would be no escaping the power of the water whipping through the canyon. Even the waves in the ocean have not put such fear in me as looking at that river. Staring at the Susquehanna River which was above flood stage on Saturday's drive north, was also nothing in comparison to the Genessee River.

Whenever I am in a place close to a powerful body of water, my mind wanders to the Lord and His mighty power. Psalm 77:16 says of the waters, "The waters saw you, O God, the waters saw you and writhed; the very depths were convulsed... Your path led through the sea, your way through the mighty waters, though your footprints were not seen." I am pretty sure this refers to the waters the Israelites passed through, but it is amazing to think of the Genesee River, in all of its current power, convulsing in the presence of God. My mind cannot comprehend His mighty power and His holiness. (I will post some pictures of the falls as soon as I can get them uploaded.)

I am now heading southward again but with one more stop on my way. I have a couple other road trips in the next 3 weeks before beginning my job. I doubt that any will involve quite as many backroads or raging waters but wherever I go, there is good fellowship. With all of the people whom I have also met while overseas on work teams, I feel like I know people in most of the country and many parts of the world. It is a blessing!

"Wanting to Satisfy the Crowd..."

2011-04-22T15:30:00.000-07:00

April 22, 2011,

Today is Good Friday. The weather is a fitting reminder of what it might have been like over 2000 years ago when Jesus was nailed to the cross. I did not spend much time outside because of the chill and the drizzle, other than to get in and out of my car (and to walk around a block to copy down some numbers in the city for apartments to rent). This afternoon the words, "Wanting to please the crowd, Pilate released Barnabas to them. He had Jesus flogged, and handed him over to be crucified." (Mark 15:15) caught my attention. The first five words were the ones that resonated in my heart because they can lead to so much trouble. How many times have I said "No" to something I should have said "Yes" to or "Yes" to that which I knew in my heart was not God's best? How many times have I been quiet when I should have spoken up or on a different occasion spoke a word to contribute to gossip? How often have I not done something for fear of what others will think or on the other side of the coin, done something because of the pressure from those around me? Basically the reason captured by those five words, "wanting to please the crowd..." have the power to lead us where we do not want to go -- all because we want to please others.

Pilate had power over those who brought Jesus before him and yet he feared their power. He feared losing his position. He feared creating a stir. In another of the gospels we are told he clearly knew that Jesus was innocent but releasing a guilty man and sentencing the innocent one was to Pilate worth the price. Because had he not done so, he would have been accused of harboring an enemy of Caesar. His decision to satisfy the crowd led to the crucifixion of an innocent man, which we know had to happen to the Son of God because of the prophecy in the Old Testament. The death of His only Son on the cross was God's redemption plan for the world. And I am oh so thankful for it!! But at the same time I do not want to be like Pilate who made his decision so as to please others. To appease, to satisfy. So often those motivations cause us to take our eyes off of the One who we are called to please -- God our Father. I am challenged again in this Easter season to look at what is the motivation behind my choices. I want to choose Jesus in everything.

Lovely Spring

2011-04-20T13:42:00.000-07:00

April 20, 2011

And so months after my last entry, I finally return to the blogging world. I have lots to write but other things have taken priority. This afternoon I am sitting outside with my computer taking care of details. The rain has temporarily passed by and we are left with a glorious spring day. Before me is a bank of yellow and white daffodils; purple, blue, and yellow violets; bleeding hearts, and the beginnings of blossoms on a dogwood tree. I do love spring in spite of the fact that I also love snow. It was a gift (for me an probably no one else in Lancaster County) to have seen snow and daffodils on my second day back in Lancaster -- April 1. What caught my attention just a few minutes ago were two ants. At first glance it looked as if they were working together to carry a long blade of gress. But upon closer inspection I realized that the one ant would periodically hop on the grass and be carried. Other times it would step off and crawl in a different direction. Dead weight more than a helping hand. It was an interesting sight among ants who so often work as a team. Many analogies could be made but I will not make them today. I simply enjoyed the scene.

Adjusting back to the United States is going well overall. There are definitely challenges and moments of sadness. A few things just do not seem normal yet. I am so accustomed to handing my credit card directly to a cashier that I had to be told there was a scanner in front of me to use. While helping out at Black Rock Retreat these past few days, I realized that my tolerance for others talking while I am has gone up. It almost head to because culturally it happened much more frequently in Latin America and I had to get use to it. I have quite a few praise stories to share, but I will have to wait until another moment. For now I will just mention how thankful I am to be able to enjoy the views of this spring as well as the time with my family and friends.

A Week of Baby-sitting

2011-03-25T18:43:00.000-07:00

March 25, 2011
As the week draws to an end so does my babysitting. I just left little Lisbeth with Wes and Cindy Williamson and am now on my journey back to San Pedro Sula. The goodbye was definitely with sadness in my heart because I realized that Lisbeth had become attached to me again and she trusts me, and now I am leaving for a long time. I will always treasure this week and its special memories as I played with her, held her, read to her and sang with her. There were various moments when I wanted to cry, both from joy and from sadness.

This week with her showed me a lot about the heart of a three year old. Tuesday morning LIsbeth woke up sick and so I stuck close by her to make sure that she had the bucket in time no matter where she was. We ended up watching Nemo and then reading. By late afternoon she seemed a lot better so we headed down to the beach with another missionary family. It was Lisbeth’s first time to see the ocean (well the Caribbean) and the waves. She was appalled when Becca picked up the sand, saying it was dirty. And it took her a bit to get accustomed to the waves but soon she was delighting us all with her laughter each time a wave came in and whoever was holding her jumped and held her high above the swell. It was probably only the cold that drove her out of the water before the others.

Wednesday I headed to La Ceiba to finalize my car sale. Thankfully things went quite well and we found someone to do the paperwork and standing in line for us so the new owner was even able to pick up insurance while we waited. I returned to Balfate with no car in my name which felt a bit weird. When I got there, Lisbeth was still down for her nap but when she awoke she was happy to see me but then stayed rather somber. Becca said that she often likes to be held after her nap so I picked her up and cuddled with her. Before long she started to whimper and then cry. She would not respond to the question of whether she was sad or not, but we were pretty sure that was the case. Perhaps she thought that Wes and Cindy would be coming back to her or her mommy or who knows what. Whatever the case she spent the next half hour or so crying and Ellie and Becca joined me in singing, praying and holding her. In the end Lisbeth calmed down and she looked up at me with deep eyes that seemed to hold the question, “Can I trust you?” I eventually got up to make dinner and minutes later she was laughing and playing with Becca. I saw though the raw pain in her heart and eyes as she struggles to understand the changes in her life and particularly why her mommy is not around.

Throughout the week I discovered that any personal time I wanted pretty much needed to happen early morning or late at night, though I was always very tired with the latter. Thursday morning I finally made it a priority to go for a run so I headed down to the dirt road in front of the hospital community to run. It was all good until a vehicle would go by and stir up lots of dust. I concluded the run by running on the beach along the water’s edge. This morning I made that my whole run and ran up and down the beach line. It was a tranquil spot with an awesome view of the water, the Cayos Chinos (islands) across the way), a mangrove swamp, terns, and a kingfisher. I paused in the run long enough to catch three leaves amongst the many that fell on that beach. My feet stayed dry but when I would retrace my steps, many of them had already been washed away and forgotten. Hmm… does that hold true to life and wherever we tread? There are those places and people whom we will forget and they will also forget us. Our impact may not remain visible. But then there are those lives in which the footprint we leave behind is permanent. I want to be the kind of person who leaves footprints that are permanent because they speak of Christ Jesus.

Thursday itself was more of a challenging day with Lisbeth because shortly into the morning she scraped her knee (slightly) and that set her off in crying. It was humorous seeing her kick the soccer ball later favoring only the one leg and maintaining the idea that the other was hurting. There was a lot of whining and not wanting to leave Ellie and Becca alone so that they could do their school work. I discovered that you sometimes have to be creative to get cleaning down with a toddler around. Thankfully she became entertained with an indoor swing that they had at the house where we were staying, but I had to push her every few minutes since she has not gotten the art of pumping ones legs to maintain the swinging movement. During her nap time I finished the preparations for a dish to take to the Thursday evening fellowship meal that happens nearly every Thursday night in this missionary community. Because I knew that I was leaving the country in three days I was not exactly excited about meeting lots of new people, but it was good in the end. Throughout the course of this week I have read Green Eggs and Ham or Huevos Verdes con Jamón more than any other time in my life. It is Lisbeth’s favorite book and she wants to hear it before bedtime and every naptime. I usually enjoyed bedtime though because after reading a Bible Story and then Dr. Suess, we would sing and pray with Lisbeth. Many times she would join in on the song to the best of her ability. Her singing of “Jesus…” or “Worthy…” touched my heart.

And now here I am at Friday and my final days in Honduras. I left the Williamson children around noon today, taking Lisbeth with me so that they could get school work done and so that she would see Wes and Cindy were back before I took off. When I mentioned to her that I would be going on a trip and not see her for a long time, she got sad. I thought that she might choose the rejecting (“well then, I am just not going to love you anymore”) stance but she did not and was willing to hug me up until we parted ways. It would seem that I am a post griever and that the realities of all of my goodbyes this past month will not hit me until later – probably when things slow down a bit. Right now, I continue to move from one thing to the next and from one visit, with its goodbye, to another.

The Chicken Bus Travel

2011-03-15T10:07:00.000-07:00

March 14, 2011
In amongst the scary turns and the construction on the highway from Tegucigalpa and San Pedro Sula I am taking a few moments to update my blog. I am returning from a trip to visit missionary friends in Tegucigalpa and a few days with Evelin at the rehab center. My friends, whom I had known from Costa Rica, just arrived in Honduras the end of January so I was able to hear about their ministry and see a bit of their life. I was reminded of the instability of life in Central America the one afternoon as I sat with my friends outside playing a game of Settler’s in the green area within the walls of their apartment complex. All of a sudden, not too far away, we heard the rattle of gunfire. It broke the tranquility of the afternoon. A little while later we heard a car alarm going off but it was a moving car alarm which meant it was probably being stolen. And then the final break in tranquility was when their neighbor, a lawyer with a bodyguard, pealed into the parking area and then left quickly. You just never know what to expect. But I am reminded that it is nothing in compared to the tragedy and instability in Japan right now. Because I had no internet much of the weekend I have not been able to keep up on what is happening there, but I know that it is not good.

The other main part of my trip was a visit with Evelin. I knew that it would hold challenges because on Friday she told me that she was ready to leave even though she is only two months into what is at least a four month program. I knew that there were lots of prayers being lifted up as I went into the visit and looking back I see God’s hand at work. I have discovered over the last few years that God seems to bring me back into Evelin’s life in just the right moments. I am honored that He continues to work through me in her life. Saturday evening we talked with one of the staff at Door of Hope and presented Evelin with the reality of the future, that which she preferred to overlook. Through sharing with her and a time of prayer, God spoke to her heart and convicted her she recognized that this was not God’s timing for her to leave. Her desire is to submit to His plans. I know that the road ahead of her will still hold many challenges but I am thankful to see her looking to fix her eyes on Jesus and not the battles within.

These bus rides are interesting. Whether it be bad movies which I would rather not see or now opera, I have not been too impressed with the on-board entertainment. I try to drown out the sound with an I-pod and music but it only partially works.
As I return to San Pedro Sula, I will be picking up my car from the mechanic and hopefully everything that needs to be fixed for selling it will be taken care of. Things seem to be working out quite well with selling it but I am praying that on the day of signing papers and everything there will not be any glitches as can happen in this country. I feel like I do not have too many days left for meeting up with friends to say goodbye but I am hoping that the time I have is sufficient. I just need to plan ahead and plan well.

With all of the curves right now, I am feeling that I would be better off not looking at a computer screen so my entry ends here.

*I must add one more comment on my trip, now that I have reached my destination. I was traveling in a coach bus which provides extra security and a place to store your luggage. It is not what they call the “chicken bus” – the type where you may have a live chicken trying to sit in your lap. Well, I discovered that I was on a “chicken bus.” Mid-way through the trip, a bag that had been precariously placed in the overhead compartment, came crashing down to the floor and rolled under my seat. I could not reach it so I left it there, especially because no one seemed concerned about it. When we reached the city and the bag rolled in the other direction, a bunch of liquid spilled out onto the floor. At first I thought it was my soda but upon closer examination of the bag and its contents, I realized that what lay at my feet was a thawing chicken – and a big one at that. Why someone decided to transport a chicken from one city to another on a four hour bus trip, I cannot pretend to understand. All I know is that once the bag was open more and juices were running out a very unpleasant odor began to seep from the bag. I was thankful to get off the bus and move into the terminal.

The Heart of a Child

2011-03-08T08:02:00.000-08:00

March 8, 2011

These past few days have contained lots of moments with little Lisbeth. So that the Williamson family could have a break and some time together, I took care of Lisbeth for various moments. Since a lot of the time overlapped with her naps, it was not very difficult. She has become a sweet little girl with a lot more joy in her heart. Her favorite past-time in preparation for sleeping is that of reading "Green Eggs and Ham." It is a tongue-twister in English but try it in Spanish for an even greater challenge. By the end of the month, I should know it pretty well. How precious it has been to watch her growing more mature and becoming more loving! She gives hugs out quite freely this days and when she needs to seek forgiveness, she will also give a hug of pardon. Her vocabulary is growing daily and so there is a spattering of words that you can here any given day. "Hola" is always said with a smile and a tilt of the head.

Yesterday morning we played make believe travel in a car as she sat in her car seat which had been left on the porch. Later we went over to her cousin's house where we played some soccer. It was an interesting game considering that she is only three and her one cousin is a year and a half. He was more interested in picking off the flower heads than in playing but Lisbeth could turn out to be a very good soccer player with all of her spunk and energy.

I am treasuring these moments to spend with Lisbeth because I know that they will not be many more. Tomorrow I will be in the city to get my car repaired and then heading to Tegucigalpa to visit missionary friends. My final stop will be a few days with Evelin as I both say goodbye to her and also encourage her.

These final days here in Honduras will be busy and I am praying that I can get everything accomplished in good time, in particular the sale of my car -- which is coming along as long as the one missionary family decides that it is a go.

So I am off to finish some details at camp before heading to the city this afternoon or tomorrow morning for car repairs.

The Whirlwind of Time

2011-03-05T07:18:00.000-08:00

March 5, 2011
I had no idea that I would get so behind in blogging, but it has happened thanks to a myriad of events and busyness. These few current moments of quietness that I am enjoying are taking place at a hotel/restaurant in Honduras not far from the camp. I came here this morning to do a Skype call since the connection out at camp is sporadic at best. Soon I will head back to camp to continue my packing and organizing of things and then later to participate in a Young Adult retreat with the church I attended while living here. It will be a good way to re-connect and then say goodbye to a lot of people at once.

So much has happened in these last two months. Since returning to El Salvador after Christmas, the time was like a whirlwind, whipping past me. I spent over two weeks as a tía for several different age groups. Day one of my time with the six youngest girls, I realized that maybe I do not ever want seven children. Well, at least not all around the same age and all girls who do lots of fighting and complaining. Thankfully things improved after Day 1 but I was grateful to be able to move up and care for the four middle aged girls.

Just over a week ago I had my despedida “farewell party” at La Casa de Mi Padre. It was a bittersweet time as I enjoyed the songs and sharing of the children but also knew that it was “good-bye” as far as for me playing a significant role in their daily lives. They have taught me so much and I was thankful to hear from their own lips or pen that I have made an impact on their lives. Two days ago I received word that they father of a six year old girl there, was killed on his way to work. In moments like these, it is hard to not be closer to the children and staff to support them. The father was one who participated in family visits and showed lots of love to his daughter. I can only imagine the grief of little Karla at this point.

Last Saturday instead of traveling to Honduras as I had planned, we waited a day so that I could better pack and rest a bit. That morning as I ate breakfast with a family in a relatively safe neighborhood, someone came along and stole my spare tire. And so the rest of the morning was spent looking for a new tire and lock with the help of the one housedad. I could not believe that the theft had happened on my very last day in the country. In reflecting on the situation though, I realized that there are things for me to learn. All too often I am very dependent on my “spare tire” or “Plan B.” I like to have a back-up plan and know my way out of potential problems. Sometimes all of my planning comes at the expense of fully trusting in the Lord and His sovereign plans. And then too I often have way too many things with me, like an abundance of spare tires.

Well, that is an overview for the moment of a few recent happenings. If I can make the time to write, there will definitely be more to come. Car problems hours from the city, giving a ride to the police and their machine guns, Lisbeth’s latest development and skills and other such things. I will try to keep you posted.

A Few Random Stories

2011-02-05T07:29:00.000-08:00

February 5, 2011

Well, I am not doing a good job this year of keeping up with my blog. Life seems to have gotten so much busier somehow and at night by the time I return home (if I return home and am not a tia), I am thinking about sleeping or some other task at hand. At any rate this morning while I wait for the family members to arrive for Family Visit Day, I have a few moments to reflect on the week. This has been the first week back as far as staff meetings and childcare trainings -- the things that normally happen when school is in session. I have been busy preparing for some of the future childcare trainings by working on putting together (or translating) questions for the book Boundaries which the staff will be going through. I will be giving the introduction to the book on my last day at La Casa -- February 25. I do not like to think too much about that day because it will be difficult one. A big part of me does not want to move on and yet I know that it is what God is calling me to do for this season.

Over this past week I have found myself smiling and laughing at random questions that the young children ask or the conclusions that their brains come up with, bringing two unrelated matters. Children do make me smile. Last night some of the youngest ones participated in a little song and creative movement at the farewell party for their tia. It was so cute to see them so dressed up and then spinnigng around, partially doing the movements.

As far a few other random stories in the week. I must remember that three short honks is not a friendly reminder to keep moving! In fact that is the equivalent of giving the finger in the States. But three honks seems so much more natural than two or four. Yesterday I almost got in trouble when I unthinkingly honked three times. I gasped when I realized what I had done and quickly added a fourth. I was apalled to think of the message that I had just sent. Also having to do with roads, I have been noticing a lone corn stalk on my way to work each day. It is growing right on the road, just at the edge of the sidewalk. Apparently if found a way to reach a bit of soil and anchor down. There are tassels on it right now but I would be surprised to see any ears of corn result from it.

On Thursday I went for a twenty minute run with two of the older children at La Casa. They both need exercise and the one in particular since she just discovered that at 18 she has high blood pressure. I am trying to instill in the children the importance of healthy living though I realize that my making cookies with them did not exactly support that lifestyle idea. I would love to see a few of the chidlren continuing to run even after I leave. Earlier in the week I had gone on a walk with few of the children and the dog. There was a close call as one of the girls started to follow the dog across the street without looking as to if any cars were coming. I grabbed her arm and stopped her and so the dog stopped too and just in time because a car was coming. The young girl was scared by the close call and realized that she has to look and not impulsively run. I pray that the incident was enough to make her remember to be careful next time.

And so those are a few stories though I know there are many more to share and maybe I can get a few more written down.

What 2011 Will Not Bring...

2011-01-27T12:17:00.001-08:00

January 27, 2011

It would seem that 2011 will not bring lots of blog entries. I simply have been out of time for writing and updating my blog. I suppose that I could be writing at 4:00AM when I first wake the girls up to get ready for school but for now that is a good time for me spend with the Lord.

The year will probably not bring me much snow either though I know that Lancaster County is currently covered with a blanket of white snow. I am sitting here in El Salvador on the porch on a bright, hot sunny day. I know that many would like to trade places with me and I of course would love the snow adventures. This past week and a half have held lots of days as a tia. For the most part it has gone well though I am getting tired and looking forward to some time off on Saturday. The children are in school this week which does mean that I have some free time in the mornings -- a big blessing. I have yet to actually sleep though as naps have always been difficult for me. I am with the "medianas" or girls between 11 and 14. There are only four of them and really they have been doing quite well. They are much easier to be in charge than the six youngest girls as will be my responsibility several days in this next month.

As for what else the year will not bring, I do not know since we are only in 2011. But realy overall, I expect 2011 to bring adventures, joys, and of course challenges since they are inevitable in life. But as I have seen in the past, I believe for the future that God will continue to show Himself faithful.

And I'm Back!

2011-01-12T16:26:00.000-08:00

January 12, 2011
After what seems like years (and really it has been a year as far as the numbers go), I am back to blogging. My travels over Christmas and New Year’s ended up being longer and more involved than I had originally thought and so writing did not make it on my “To-do” list. But now I am here in El Salvador once again getting settled into a routine that will change in another two weeks as the children head back to school.
All in all I was out of El Salvador for almost 2 ½ weeks and when I made it back to the home for the first time last Saturday, I was very happy to see the children’s smiling faces. They are good at giving hugs! At the same time I did enjoy the majority of my time away. How thankful I was to be with my family again – all thirty-five of them over Christmas! This was the year where all of the cousins show up so we had lots of fun together. Because of a large portion of us getting sick on Christmas Day, our annual soccer game did not make it on the agenda. But there were other fun games and good conversations. I, of course, was delighted to be with my nephew Jack again and to see his love of water (including seeing others get wet – I think he will be mischievous yet). A few of the small luxuries of the United States that I enjoyed were: driving with the windows down, brushing my teeth with tap water, and not having to worry if my dishes or foods were completely dry after having been washed.
On December 28th I set off for Central America with a stop in Honduras. Due to snow in the north I ended up spending more time in the airport than I had planned, but thankfully I still got out the same day. My intention was to be in Honduras until the New Year since there were no children left to take in here in El Salvador for New Year’s. (The children at La Casa de Mi Padre are divided among the staff families for Christmas and New Year’s so that everyone can experience Christmas in a family setting.)
I will expound on the Honduras happenings in the next blog entry. For the most part settling back into life in El Salvador has gone well. It was good to be back at my church here in San Salvador and be challenged by the message once again. I had opportunity over the weekend to connect with some of my friends from Bible Study here. For me, one of the best things too was just to have some time alone. For 2 ½ weeks I had been living out of a suitcase in places that were not my home and I was ready for more of routine.
This week I have gone with the girls to the park several times to help them both get exercise and have some fun. I enjoyed introducing some camp games from years ago when I worked at Black Rock Retreat. Of course some ended up being rather chaotic considering that the age range was 5-21 (and then two adults). From that time in games, I have on my heart trying to help the girls become aware of (and care about) the power of their words. It seems worse than before the manner in which they talk to each other. Perhaps it is good that vacation time is coming to an end and they will be spending time at school and not always with the same sixteen girls.
Today we had story hour with the younger girls and due to be able to mold play-doh into something mentioned in the story, they enjoyed the time. Even Ralph and the Motorcycle has a lesson or two to teach to children. With a few of the older girls, I played a table game before they got involved in a movie and game cube. I am all for challenging the minds, which is what the game Blokus does. Yesterday I baked Jamaican Banana Oatmeal cookies with a group of the girls so we have been busy.
Perhaps my favorite moments since my return to El Salvador have been those of praying with various staff members and encouraging them. The Lord taught me a lot personally through the coaching course that I was finishing up last year and many of the concepts I am finding applicable to all areas of life. I pray that the Lord can continue to use me to encourage and be present to support those who are passing through difficult moments.

To the Peak of Another Volcano -- Chaparrastique

2010-12-16T08:36:00.000-08:00

December 16,2010,

There is something about hiking and reaching a peak that excites me. I love the challenge of the climb and then the view from the top. On Sunday I woke up early to head out to a volcano with an "extreme hiking group" here in El Salvador. The climb began with us winding through a coffee plantation ripe with coffee beans. They were so pretty that I was tempted to snag a few and eat them but I resisted the temptation. Along the road we came upon a coral snake that had been cut up but it was still obvious as to what it was. I preferred coming upon it dead than alive.

After the coffee plantation we began the real ascent with some steep grades and slippery terrain because we were walkig on loose volcanic rock. One of the words of warning that the guard gave us was that of, "Make sure a rock is solid before you step on it. Sometimes the big ones seems solid but when you put your weight on them, they start an avalanche of rocks." I reflected on that statement as I gingerly tested rocks before putting my weight on them. I thought of how sometimes even in life, that which appears solid, will suddenly give way. At one point I was singing (in my head) "On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand ... ." I encountered quite a few other analogies in my hike that day. At one point one of the girls -- a new found friend -- reached back to offer me a hand up a large rock. I hesitated a moment before accepting herself because I knew that I could do it alone. But as I thought about, I realized, but why? She had gone before me and was already up on the rock. Accepting her help would make my climb easier. So why not let others help me? It was a good reminder to curb some of my independence and allow others to bless me and help me along.

The rocks I had to climb or step over along the way reminded me of another song called "The Lead of Love" by Caedmon's Call. The words that were in my mind were that of, "... you have to walk the rocks to see the mountain view... looking back I see the lead of love." I love that about life that as we move forward from a moment of difficulty, a rock or obstacle, if we reflect on the moment, we can see God's lead of love through those hard times and that in the end He has a plan and purpose for our lives. The rock we had to face was not the end. He is there with us among the rocks, offering a hand and comfort or even carrying us at times, and afterwards He is has a mountain view for us -- the opportunity to look back and see the purpose for which He allowed us to struggle over those rocks. Sometimes we cannot see the reason until much later, but there is good to come from even those bad situations because God is a God of love.

When we reached the top of the volcano, the crater was barren with sulpher fumes coming out and a gurgling sound coming from it. There was a little ledge where I could sit and see to my left the barreness of the crater and to the right the green valley below. I was reminded of those who try to straddle the fence between the living and the dead. I definitly choose life in my walk and indeed in this case I did not go down and explore the crater. That would have been too much. The view from the top was awesome and I felt like I could see so much of El Salvador. We kept taking pictures along the way but someone commented that the view would be best from the top. I had to think of our Heavenly Father who sits in heaven and can see the whole world. He has the perfect view!

The descent was even more challenging for me than the climb because it was no longer about strength and endurance but about traction and the shoes that I took are on their last leg. Indeed that might have been their last journey. I fell quite a few times and slid many more but thankfully made it down the volcano safely and back to the car. We got to the van just before dark for which I was thankful. Overall it was an awesome journey and I made some new friends too which is always fun. The majority of the group were not Christians as I could tell by their words and actions but I hope that I was able to share a bit of Christ's light with them in our hike.

Culture Shock

2010-12-16T08:32:00.000-08:00

December 16, 2010

Culture shock is something that happens every now and then and often unexpectedly. For me this week it was looking for baking soda in the grocery store only to be told that it is in the medicine aisle. I guess it shows that baking is not a tradition here. Yesterday at the theater I was handed a bag of popcorn with the straw sticking out of it. One of the housemoms joked that that is how they eat popcorn here in El Salvador -- with a straw. Definitely another culture shock! Though really the straw was there for easy carrying.

And finally the other culture shock moment came on Sunday when I left my house at 4:20AM to go on a volcano hike. I figured that on a Sunday at that hour there would be no problems with traffic but I did not take into account that it is a week of various fairs and celebrations within the Catholic church. And so at 4:15AM I found myself in a traffic jam because people were arriving to celebrate the fair of the Virgen Guadalupe. Unfortunately the church is right along a main highway and the cars were taking up one of the lanes and sometimes unloading in a second and so there was one good lane for traveling. Would people go to a fair at 4:20AM in the United States? I do not think I know too many people who would, but maybe I am mistaken.

The Days of Summer

2010-12-16T08:20:00.000-08:00

December 16, 2010,

It is actually not summer here in El Salvador though we have entered into the dry season (so maybe it wouuld be called summer). It does not feel like summer in that we have enjoyed some cooler days over the past few weeks and lots of wind. But nonetheless it feel like summer in the sense that the children are on vacation. I have been doing lots of baking with the girls and in that teaching some lessons on what it means to share, wait (as we worked with yeast the other week), and think of others before ourselves. Today will be another cookie baking session with some of the older girls who will help me to make cookies for a snack for tomorrow's award ceremony. I have also introducted exercise or recreation to the schedule. I was impressed the other day when one of the older girls got some of the younger ones together for stretching and soccer on the tiny porch because they had not been able to to go the park and play there. When I was out last week for a workshop, they still went to the park to play soccer and basketball. I am encouraged to see the concept fo the importance of exercise taking root. Without it the children pass too much time sitting in front of the television.

Since the oldest girls are without a tia at this point, I had them over for a sleepover one night and stayed at La Casa with them another night to give them a little extra attention and allow the other two tias to focus on just their groups. Tomorrow night I will be back as a tia which will make for a long weekend, but it should be fun. I look forward to sharing a devotional with them to encourage them in their walk with the Lord.

Yesterday a local business blessed the home with a free trip to see Narnia in 3-D at the theater. It was a fun time even though I missed a lot of the movie by taking the girls out for potty breaks. A free 18oz soda for everyone is not the best idea for little children! On the trip home several of the older girls and I were able to talk some about the movie and the spiritual applications that we saw. I was disappointed that one of my favorite parts from the book was left out (as far as the detail) in the movie but overall it was good.

So all in all these "days of summer" are going well. I will not be here for Christmas but come New Year I will have a couple of the children stay with me for a few days as the children are divided among the staff families so that the home can close down and no one has to work. It should be an adventure!

A Belated Look at Thanksgiving

2010-12-10T07:48:00.000-08:00

December 10, 2010
So I still have a lot to catch up on with my blog entries and before it gets too far away in the past that I forget about it, I went to mention my Thanksgiving here in El Salvador. It was a new experience for me as far as Thanksgivings go. Since Thanksgiving is not a holiday here it is a day like any other and is fair game for events. This year two graduations took place on Thanksgiving Day, one in the morning and one late afternoon. The first was the equivalent of a kindergarten graduation – the kind that are always interesting because of the cute children and their different acts or behaviors. Unfortunately the program started very late and then dragged on, but overall it was okay. It was great to see Agustin’s family there celebrating with him. After the first graduation a co-worker invited me to her house for a Thanksgiving lunch. I already had plans for a 3:00PM Thanksgiving meal but it was with people who I did not really know so I decided to stop by my friend’s house first and enjoy a non-traditional Thanksgiving meal but with friends.
From there I ran over to the other Thanksgiving party which was with persons who work with USAID. I only slightly know the woman who invited me but I ended up having some good conversation with a Christian El Salvadorian woman there. Directly after the meal (and before dessert was served) I had to leave to get to the second graduation of the day. Salvador, one of the boys in the home, was graduating from high school and he actually graduated as the valedictorian. I did not realize he was valedictorian until the next day since I did not know that word in Spanish. I had wondered why such a big deal was being made about this graduation since it was actually the second among the children. When I realized he was graduating with the highest honors, it all made sense. I was just a bit slow. 
After graduation we went for my third Thanksgiving meal of the day (thankfully I ate only a little bit at each meal) at Kentucky Fried Chicken. Not my typical Thanksgiving stop but it was where Salvador wanted to celebrate with his family and staff. During the graduation ceremony it was moving to see his biological dad up front with the housemom and counselor participating in the ceremony of passing on a candle to the graduates. God is at work in the families of the children at La Casa and in several cases bringing about restoration and healing which is very exciting. This Christmas more children than ever are going to be spending time with their biological families instead of going to the homes of the staff.

Night of Talents

2010-12-03T13:14:00.000-08:00

December 3, 2010

This past Tuesday was a Night of Talents for the children here at La Casa de Mi Padre. Through songs, dance, and drama they demonstrated their many talents and here are a few photos to give an idea of what it looked like. My talent was helping a few of the girls make cupcakes for a snack so I did not have to get up on the stage which I preferred.

Where Has The Time Gone?

2010-12-03T12:53:00.000-08:00

December 3, 2010

That is the question I ask myself as I reflect on all of the days that have slipped away without any sort of update. In some ways I feel as if there are have been so many happenings that keeping up with them is nearly impossible. But I will try to do a re-cap with some photos and then maybe go a little deeper in another post. With the coming of December it feels like the children truly are in the middle of their vacation time. I have gotten into more of a routine here at La Casa for this season. Instead of having varying hours every day, I mostly work 9:00AM-6:00PM. At least that is the plan. But then there are events such as rallies and Talent Shows where everything changes. Just this week I started a schedule for doing physcial recreation with the girls twice a week and made cooking groups. Today the older girls and I went to a nearby by sports complex and ended up playing some kickball. Yesterday with the younger girls we ended up in a shady park near my apartment where we were able to run, nearly get sick on the merry-go-round, play tag, and of course try to catch leaves. (I am trying to bring a revolution to El Salvador via creating a new sport -- leaf catching. It is catching on with the girls even though not too many leaves are falling right now.) This afternoon while the girls are playing nintendo, I find myself with some time to do some catching up. And so I think that I will work backwards from today.

Two weeks in a row I have gone out to the farm and witnessed the Equestrian Therapy program underway. This week I actually got on a horse myself which I have not done since Camp Hebron days in 1996. The first week the older girls were very scared of even getting near the horses but they all mounted. One of them remained terrified and trembled most of the time. This week she chose not to get on the horse but I am hoping that in the weeks to come, she will try again. There is something to be said about conquering a fear of heights, horses, climbing, etc... and how it can give courage to also face the fears one has in the daily life. Coming from a recreation therapy background, I am all for those challenges that can be applied to life. I knew that I should ride one of the horses to show that even though I am not really comfortable on a horse and have a healthy fear, I am willing to push myself out of my comfort zone. And in the end it went better than I had expected.

Endings and Beginnings

2010-11-22T07:57:00.000-08:00

November 22, 2010

Last week was a week of both endings and beginnings. Both have their place in our lives. On Wednesday the adoption of little Diana was finalized and after a farewell party, she left La Casa for good with her new adoptive parents. Hopefully this week she will be able to travel to the States with them in time for Thanksgiving. She left crying because she was leaving her home of nearly six years and all of the people whom she had grown to love. Even though a better life awaits her and her very own family, her thoughts were in the present moment and the losses she was about to experience. And how can a six year old even begin to process all of the changes? I remember moving to PA at age thirteen and I was not happy about the move. I was leaving the life I had known and though there were fireflies, soft grass, cousins, and snow in the north the trade off did not seem good at the time. But no more than a year later, I was convinced that the move had been for the best and I grew to love PA. I pray that the same will happen for Diana even as she adjusts to a new culture and language.

I think that spiritually I fall into a similiar position as Diana's resistance to the change many a time when I become content in the place that I am and the comfort of what I know. Being stretched spiritually and stepping out of the boat, I am not always about that. But God calls us to keep moving and growing. I do not want to be the same Jennifer Marie Hess that I am a year from now that I am today. The challenge though is saying yes to those steps that take me out of my comfort zone and the "prison" a comfort zone can even form. To move deeper into surrender to God and complete trust in Him as the director of my path.

The new beginnings of last week included the start of group therapy session with the girls' home even during the vacation. In the past they have only had group sessions during the school year but this year Patty decided to continue them through the vacation months because there are so many changes that have been "rocking" the home. A change in tias. A little girl leaving for adoption. An older girl beginning her first job. And so we focused on new beginnings as we talked last Thursday. We pray that these new beginnings will bring new life and new hope to the girls and that they can in the end grasp the changes as good, though sometimes painful in the moment.

I find myself adjusting to the vacation schedule and what that means for me and my interactions with the children and staff. In some ways I have a lot more free time to hang out with the girls. Last week that lent to some good times of talking with the older girls while helping them put up Christmas decorations or taking them on a walk. I have noticed that the girls spend the majority of their day watching movies and television and so I want to help offer some alternatives. Some of the girls would be interested in getting some exercise and it would definitely be good for them. After doing the race the other Sunday, I want to do another one in February if I am still here and I think it would be great to involve some of the girls. One thing that struck me though in my conversations with the girls last week is that when I leave, I will be yet another loss in their lives. I had kind of hoped that I could slip in and out without creating another hole or loss for them and yet to achieve that I would have had to maintain my distance and not really invest in their lives. I hate to think of causing them more pain though. And yet at the same time I do not want to check out of the relationships now. And so my prayer is that I will be able to invest in the girls for as long as God wants and that we will all be prepared for the goodbye and be able to accept it as a part of the package deal of relationships.

In This Present Moment

2010-11-13T13:07:00.000-08:00

November 13, 2010
Saturday is bringing to close a long week – one in which I find myself very tired come this day – but it has also been a good week. The week has held challenges and disappointments but what brings me the most peace is that I know that I am exactly where God wants me for this present moment. I do not sense that the “present moment” will extend much beyond my one year mark in February but looking back and even ahead, I can see that God had me here to both fill in gaps and to gain new insights and perspective of what God is calling me to.

Yesterday marked the beginning of the schedule vacation events for the children who are now on vacation from school. We began with a “Tarde Típica” (Traditional afternoon) at the farm where we enjoyed traditional foods (I even prepared a Salvadorian dish though I learned it was not quite how they make it – I followed a recipe that probably cut the sugar in half) and some games. I had a little “kick-off” of vacation season at my apartment on Thursday when I served breakfast to fifteen girls and two tías. It was a good time. They seemed to enjoy the eggbake and baked oatmeal, both of which are not typical foods for here. Afterwards I shared some verses on encouragement (which is a theme God keeps bringing up in my own life) and then we took a few minutes to write encouraging words on a paper stuck to the back of each person. Each girl was then able to take home those words from their housemates and tías. I think it was good for all of them and I was encouraged as well by what they wrote.

The other big event of this week for me has been that of spending time with a family from the United States who is here to adopt one of the little girls. They are in the final stages of the adoption and really we had hoped the papers would all be signed this past Monday and they would have custody of her. But unfortunately the judge has asked for more paperwork and so they still do not have custody which means that someone from La Casa has to be with them and the little girl at all times as a chaperone. Two days this week that person was me and this afternoon it should happen again. What I have realized though is that God wants me in this role for the moment. It has been neat to watch the family beginning to bond with the little girl. There is much pain and stress for them right now in this waiting process but the Lord is sustaining them. I am encouraged and challenged as I watch them because I could see the Lord calling me to do a similar thing in the future though maybe in not cross culturally. Who knows? Certainly not I. But God is opening my eyes and for that I am very thankful. I try to stay out of the way so that they can bond and I can provide translation and be in prayer as needed.

My week has been long for one other reason and that is that I trained for a race for tomorrow. Nothing like last minute training! I heard about the race last Sunday – an 11km race. I have not run a race since college and it was never that long. I have continued to run though prior to this week I was not running a lot. When I saw the flyer for the race, I really wanted to do it. Not to win but just to run a race. So my goal is to finish without dying. I know that in the United States I would often go out for a 5 mile run after not having done so for months and I was always fine. Hopefully the same will be true tomorrow morning as I do the early morning race. I can let you know more after tomorrow.

The Flying Cockroaches

2010-11-06T13:39:00.000-07:00

November 6, 2010

I believe that every place in the world probably has its hated critters. In the north there are deer ticks and black flies. My house in PA was often overrun by ladybugs which though cute by nature, are not so cute when found by the hundreds in one's house. Well, here in Central America one of my hated critters is the cockroach. Perhaps it stems from traumatic childhood experiences with cockroaches while living in Florida. A cockroach in your peanut butter and jelly sandwich in first grade is enough to create some later dislike of the insect. On Thursday evening I had some unpleasant encounters with cockroaches. Unfortunately the encounter came on the eve of just having helped two girls review for their science exam information about diseases and how cockroaches are carriers of many diseases. Thursday evening I was making a yogurt, fruit smoothie when all of a sudden I felt something land on my shoulder. I brushed it off and then discovered it was a cockroach that had just landed on me. I do not really scream, so no screams left my mouth but I think there were some gasps of horror! My problem with cockroaches is that though I hate them, I also hate killing them. The crunch and the gore are too much, especially when I do not have anything I want to dirty in my process of killing them. (I think I need to invest in a flyswatter!) This one was going to die though because it had landed on me. And so I pursued it with a vengeance and though it escaped once, it ended up dead and in the trash can. The thing was I had no idea where the cockroach had actually flew in from which made me a little worried since I had just been getting cereal out of its bag. Several hours later I returned to the kitchen and there was another cockroach on the counter! I was appalled because I had hoped that there was only one, but I guess that where there is one, there are many. Let’s just say this one died too but there were lots of squeals from me as I smashed it several times.

Friday morning I woke up early not feeling so well. Probably there was no actual connection to the cockroach incident but I had to wonder. I had gone for months without seeing cockroaches in the apartment but this week things went downhill. I need to find some natural deterrent of cockroaches. Supposedly ants do not like mint nor mosquitoes lavendar though my attempts at growing them in Honduras to prevent plagues of those two insects never really worked. The ants still made their way into the house and the mosquitoes too. Raid and daily cleaning will probably be the other option. So we will see but I hope to not have anymore bad encounters in this coming week.

A Dizzying Conversation

2010-10-28T20:15:00.000-07:00

October 28, 2010

I concluded this evening that sitting and listening to seven girls ages 10 and under talking about their behavior for the last week and commenting on everyone's behavior is quite dizzying.You have to turn your head from one to the other as you try to follow their line of thinking, and then some through in some very random comments. Anyway, today was the day of groups for the girls home again and so I met with two of the groups along with several of the other staff. The one group we ended up having in my apartment to do something a little different for the team who was celebrating her birthday today. Both of the group sessions went pretty well in spite of distractions and such.

Earlier in the week I had another conversation that could have been dizzying but thankfully was not. One of the teen girls is reading the first of the Narnia books and I asked her what she thought of it. She proceeded to give me a not so summarized play by play of what has happened thus far but then she got to the good part which was sharing with me the analogies that she sees and what God is challenging her in. I have been excited to share the Narnia books with the children because I know that the Lord has used the analogies there to challenge me in different areas of my life. I am praying that the same happens with the children and that they will see them as more than just a fun book to read.

It looks like I will be taking one of the girls hiking up a volcano on Saturday if all goes well and the weather is good. Tonight I have been watching a lovely display of lightning across the dark sky but such storms are not conducive to climbing volcanos. If we are able to do the hike, I pray that it can be a time when I can encourage this young woman because she is beginning a new adventure on Monday when she starts her first job ever and begins to gain a little more independence and responsibility. She is also the first of any of the children at La Casa to start working so it is a milestone for everyone. We pray that she will stay strong in her faith in spite of the negative influences around her in the work world where she will be.

The Adventures of El Salvador Once Again

2010-10-25T12:09:00.001-07:00

October 25, 2010

I have been back at La Casa de Mi Padre for a week now and am back in the middle of the busyness and adventures here. Last week little Karla (age 5) told me that she had forgotten when I looked like and that she thought I had been a lot taller (like 6 ft tall). I assured her that no, I was the same height as before. One of the teen girls thought I had grown taller while away, perhaps from playing basketball. So based on all of their comments, I am not sure if I grew taller or shrunk. But oh well.

Much of the week I spent reading with various of the children, helping with homework, or leading activities for the girls therapy groups. Because the girls home was just re-organized with the two youngest groups joining forces to be one large group of seven, we had decided to begin with some fun, light-hearted activities. With the youngest girls we played a game similar to "Duck, Duck, Goose" except that you have to run in the opposite direction of the person who tapped your head and then shake hands and say, "How do you do?" Because the housedad was also playing and shook their hands with great fervor, several of the girls could hardly say anything because of laughing so hard. With the middle age group of girls we played a game called "Password" that is a lot like the game "Telephone" except with drawings instead of whispering in someone's ear. It is great for then talking about communication. And with the oldest group we played "Imagine IFF" which is a game of getting to know each other. This coming week I will be doing more team-building type activities with them.

On Friday I went to the children's school for their "Feria de Paises" or "Fair of the Countries." Each grade had a country which they represented through decoration of their classroom, preparing traditional foods, wearing typical attire, and presenting a dance from their country. I felt a bit like I was walking in Europe since the majority of the countries represented were from there. the children were proud of their work and really they had done a good job.

Saturday was Family Visit day and I wandered among the families back in the pavilion. Several of the younger girls have a hard time talking with their grandmother when she comes to visit and rely on their older sister to always carry the conversation. When the older sister left, they were there with their grandmother without much to say. After showing the grandmother photos of her grandchildren, I gave the girls books to read to their grandmother to show her what they are learning. It was a humorous scene because they took turns reading her a page of their book, alternating all the way which meant that the grandmother was hearing both, "The Cat in the Hat" and "Curious George Cleans Up." I have discovered over the past few months that is a challenge to help the children and their families communicate and I am always looking for new ideas to help break some of the walls that they have up.

After the visit I stayed in the girls' home for a couple of extra hours to teach some of the older ones "Settler's of Catan." They had been wanting to play and it had never worked out. It was a good afternoon of play and I am sure we will do it again in the near future.

As we enter this new week, there are definitely challenges ahead. Several of the children are struggling in their behavior. Meanwhile various family members of the children are suffering the consequences of poor decisions which ultimately affects the children and their hopes and dreams. Please pray with us for the children and their families.

There and Back Again

2010-10-19T20:12:00.000-07:00

October 19, 2010
Well, my journey has come full circle and I am back at La Casa de Mi Padre, settling back in with my work here. I return with another 90 days on my visa which is always a praise. When I walked into the girls’ home yesterday over lunch time, the youngest girl, Karla (age 5), told me that she had forgotten what I looked like and she thought that I was a lot taller. I had been gone less than two weeks but I guess that at that age, much can be forgotten. Today one of the teen girls told me that I looked taller now and that maybe I had grown from playing basketball again. I doubt it but I guess that it would not hurt for me to grow a little taller.

I arrived in Lancaster, PA Tuesday evening the 5th of October and left again very early on the 13th. In that week I spent time with family and friends and took care of some details with my computer, getting books and jeans for the children at La Casa, and other runnings here and there. A funny moment for me was when I discovered myself mixing cement Latin America style in the mountains of PA. (That means putting the cement on the ground, pouring on water, and mixing with shovels). The technique worked pretty well for the location and we were able to fill in behind the stone wall that we had built to help sustain a footbridge over a little stream.

I found myself often starting to talk to children in Spanish, especially younger children to whom I felt the need to say, “No, you should not… .” It makes me think that I must be saying “no” too much in Spanish since it came out so easily with the Spanish accent.

In my return to El Salvador I passed through Honduras to pay my car insurance and also to make sure that I got my 90 days. It was good to get out to camp again and to see the new baby on camp – Fernando – as well as visit with the staff and Evelin. Much to my delight Lisbeth warmed up to me very quickly and shortly after I arrived we were playing like old friends (well, maybe like an aunt with her niece). The time there was a little bittersweet because Evelin is facing another difficult time and I knew that I could not do anything but pray with her, encourage her, and leave her in God’s hands. And He is good and faithful so really that is the best place for her to be, if she would just make sure that she curls up there. One precious moment was seeing her read the book, "I'll Love You Forever" to Lisbeth in the car on our way to the city. I pray that the words sunk in for both of them.

My journey back to El Salvador took about nine hours instead of six to seven but I was able to catch up on journaling and use my computer for e-mails and such. This time they showed at least one decent movie which was a blessing. I enjoyed the sights and though I did not sleep, I took time to rest a bit. And so I give thanks for the chance to get away and yet return, ready for the next couple of months.

Autumn On The Mind

2010-10-01T19:28:00.000-07:00

October 1, 2010

The last few days have felt a bit like rainy autumn days because the rains have brought in much cooler temperatures. Days like these make me long for the changes of autumn such as the beautiful colors,the shorter days (days here in Central America are always short), and the seasonal fruits and vegetables. Over the past 3months I have been reading "Charlotte's Web" with one of the girls here at the home to work on her reading comprehension. We finished the book this week and so today I took advantage of the fact that they had no school (because of the rains and flooding earlier in the week) to invite her over to my apartment to watch the movie. Even though the movie was in English with Spanish subtitles (and she cannot read quickly enough to keep up with the words) she enjoyed the movie and really the chance to get some special, individual attention. Since the movie and book speak about friendship and what is a loyal friend, we had some good moments discussing what it means to be a good friend. Anyway, within the book and movie, there are many references to autumn, the fall fairs, and such, so I am excited to be heading north next week to experience some of those things.

Tomorrow is the day of change in the girls' home. They are moving the rooms around and mixing up the groups. I plan to take at least three of the younger girls to my apartment for the morning so give the adults more freedom to get things done. If I am feeling particularly adventurous and energetic, I may bring five of them, but I am not so sure about that. I have been pretty tired the last few days trying to recover from lack of sleep earlier in the week. The new tia is settling in to the routine at the home and the changing of rooms will help to finalize the adjustments to the groups. The youngest two groups of girls have been united into one large group of seven girls. That group will be quite a handful to say the least.

About a week and a half ago I watched the two two year old boys at my apartment one morning while their tias went to a school event of the other boy in their care. I had toddler-proofed the apartment by taking away all of the glass items and electronics that did not have to out in the open. I remember with fondness making tents out of sheets draped over the furniture from my childhood so I did that in between the living and dining room. Ricardo crawled under it for a little bit but then while I was giving Emanuel some water, Ricardo decided to crawl on the armchair instead and from there stretch out on the sheet. Only he quickly discovered that the sheet was not solid material and he slowly fell to the floor while I watched from a distance, unable to get there in time to prevent his fall. Apparently he has had quite a few bumps to the head in the past because this one did not phase him for long. I decided though that maybe it would be better to go play at the park and so off we went to spend the rest of the morning on the swings, merry-go-round, and watching a bunch of ladies do some exercise routine ont he basketball court. The worst thing that happened at the park was Ricardo getting rather dirty, but then that is what little boys love to do so it was not a big deal.

I will definitely miss the children while I am in PA and Honduras but I know that time will pass quickly and soon I will be back working with them in some way whether it be in homework, reading, play, or group therapy times.

There's Just Something So Beautiful About...

2010-09-28T06:48:00.001-07:00

September 28, 2010

…Children worshiping God together. An old praise song held the words, “there’s just something so beautiful about that name… .” I would definitely agree but I also find there to be something very beautiful in children of all ages coming together to worship the Lord. Over the last 2 weeks during my times of being tía, I have had some opportunities to be with the children in worship. Every Friday evening the tíos bring the children together on the front porch for worship and then devotions, divided up by age groups. The worship team is usually comprised of various youth and then a tío. The other week I shared with the middle age group using the illustration of one of my favorite stories from Tales of the Kingdom, Princess Amanda and the Dragon. We talked about how little things can grow into big things and we quickly lose control of them and Jesus’ teaching on, “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:21.
I have run into some moments where the children are singing praise songs at inopportune times. The other day I was trying to correct one of the youngest girls and talk with her about how she had treated another one of the girls. She decided that she preferred running up the stairs singing about how God is worthy as opposed to listening. So I then tried to explain to her how God is not pleased when we sing praises to Him and disobey at the same time. Eventually she settled down and we were able to get to the impending discussion.
With covering as a tía repeatedly (and a few days consecutively) over the past week, I have a renewed appreciation for the tíos here. Not only do they have to give very early wake-up calls (usually the first children get up around 3:30AM), but bed-time comes late for them as they wrap up their many responsibilities. Discipline is a large part of the day and so creativity, wisdom, and patience are all important characteristics for the tíos. And as I have been reading about, discipline is not just about correcting behavior, it is about getting to the heart and seeing what is there and helping to mold the heart to follow after God. The work of a tío never really finishes, even when they have their days off because like parents, they are praying for their children and most likely wondering how they are doing back at La Casa. I have been reminded of how important it is to cover the lives of the tíos with prayer because they are often under attack and things like tiredness or sickness greatly increase the difficulty of their work. I can definitely say that I am thankful for and admire their frontline work with the children.

Another Early Morning Post

2010-09-24T03:39:00.000-07:00

September 24, 2010

It has been another early morning as I am here at La Casa overnight. One of the tios volunteered to go along on the morning trips to school for me so I thankfully do not have to be ready to leave the house at the same time as the children. I hope to be able to catch some sleep a little later this morning, but we will see.

Yesterday went much better with the three youngest girls than Monday. One of the girls still tried to manipulate my words and did not want to obey but she at least admitted to the disobedience which is a small step. And they all quieted down much quicker last night -- maybe because they have been getting up at 4:00AM to get ready for school instead of 5:00AM as they normally do. Two of them were very much tearing around the play area with the other children burning lots of energy late into the evening so I am sure that this helped them too.

I received some heavy news from Honduras yesterday. Two young men from the church that I attended there were kidnapped on Wednesday evening and though most kidnappings are for ransom and the people are released, Guillermo -- a young man who was turning twenty toda -- was killed and the other young man, Armando was wounded. Guillermo was one of the youth that I knew from the church because of his involvement out at camp and on a work team there. He was a young man passionate for the Lord, a leader in the youth goup and in worship teams. He was a young man with potential. It is hard to understand why he went home to be with the Lord but perhaps God wanted him before His throne to praise Him there. It may be that in his death, more lives will be touched than he could reach while he was living. I am not sure of the reasons for it all, but I do know that God is in control and that which Satan intended for evil, God can transform to be used for his glory. Please pray though for Guillermo's family, the church there in San Pedro Sula and the two other boys involved in the kidnapping who are recovering from their wounds. The burial service will take place this afternoon.

Being a Tia Again

2010-09-21T05:45:00.001-07:00

September 21, 2010,
5:00AM really seems like too early an hour to begin a blog entry, but here I am. I was a tía last night at the girls’ home and it is now the hour for the three youngest girls to be getting ready for school. I must say that yesterday was not an easy day with them. I found my patience tried in many areas as I worked with them to finish their homework and study for an English exam. There were times when just one was acting up, but at other moments it was all three. I have been reading the book (off and on) Shepherding a Child’s Heart and I realize that I need to get further along in it to be able to work more on the heart issues than just the behavior issues that come up on a nearly moment by moment basis. It breaks my heart to see how mal-intentioned they can be at one moment but so loving at another.
Yesterday was just one of the first of many nights of being tía in this coming week. I am praying that God’s grace will be sufficient for me in this role because on my own, I do not have the strength nor patience. I have to remember where these girls have come from and give them extra grace. I am sure that God probably wants to do as much work in my heart as He does in theirs.
And apparently I will need to get them up at 4:30AM instead of 5:00AM on Friday so that they are ready in time to leave for school. Today they barely made it. Besides the life as a tía, my life has been busy in other areas. I have started the last part of my Life Coaching Training course and with that comes lots of work, but it is good to continue learning. Yesterday I began coaching one of the older girls here at the home as she is trying to discern her next step and what God is calling her to. Since the majority of our communication is in Spanish, it makes the coaching even more challenging.
This past Sunday I had a good day of rest and in a sense preparing for the week. I met up with some friends from another children’s home for lunch and a table game (something I love but rarely get around to playing here unless it is with the children). During a Skype call with my family I got to play Peek-a-Boo with my little nephew which was fun. Another random highlight of the day was having a green parrot fly by my kitchen window, squawking, while I washed dishes – and this at a 4th story level. I continue to be thankful for glimpses of God’s creation from my apartment though it is in the middle of the capital city.
I need to download some pictures from last week and the Independence Day parades of the children to post in another blog. And other than that I am off to get things done this morning so that I can go to bed early tonight.

Return of the Calm

2010-09-13T10:14:00.000-07:00

September 13, 2010

I apologize for taking a while to update on how things have been since the last mention of the unrest here in El Salvador. On Thursday night the president gave a speech in which he declared there would be no dialogue with the gangs and if they caused disturbances, they would be arrested. Friday seems to have been a fairly calm day and by the weekend buses were back to their normal runs. Hopefully the gangs have gotten the message that their manipulation via fear will not be tolerated. The presence of the police and military has been increased all around the city in response to the threats and there have been quite a few arrests of gang members. And so we pray for peace.

This past weekend was my busy one with teaching Sunday School and also a Saturday Family Visit day. Both went well. This morning we did a family visit to one of the girl's family who lives and works on a coffee farm. It is a beautiful place to go but difficult to see the situation in which many of the family members find themselves. Hopefully they were encouraged by our vist and we are praying that they can make good decisions about what to do in the future.

Birthdays

2010-09-08T19:38:00.001-07:00

I wanted to post a few recent pictures from the birthday celebrations/outings of the two 2 year old boys -- Ricardo and Emmanuel. Ricardo has of late been scared over everything so nearing the pinata, the turtle in the mall, and maybe even his birthday cake was a stretch for him. Today I did not capture it on video but he was singing Happy Birthday (In Spanish of course) and dancing -- very adorable. Enjoy!

Yielding Control Through One's Fear

2010-09-08T18:53:00.000-07:00

September 9, 2010

Fear... it is something I hate but also something that I have yet to overcome in many areas. Today I am seeing how fear reigns in El Salvador in so many ways. I have gleaned a few more facts of what has been going on with the gangs and the buses not running (for 72 hours). This week the government issued a new law making it illegal to be a part of a gang. A person can now be arrested just for being a part of a gang, even if they have never committed a known crime. In response to this ruling, the two dominant gangs in El Salvador (the MS and 18 -- who are stark enemies) have come together and announced that they would not permit buses to circulate for 72 hours. They also warned people to stay off of the roads after 6:30PM. Last night the traffic in the evening passing outside my apartment was much less than usual and I did not hear cars in the morning until almost 5:00AM. Tonight I notice that there are a few more cars still on the road, daring to defy the gangs decrees.

Many people have not been able to get to work because of the lack of transportation. Others have walked for miles and for hours. I saw on the internet today that one man decided to ride bike to work since there were no buses and the police stopped him and either fined or arrested him because he was not wearing a helmet. I never even knew that was a law here. It is not a law for motorcycles so I am not sure why bicycles would be any different. (Actually I am not sure about the motorcycles either but if it is a law to wear a helmet, it often is not enforced.) The police and army are supposedly out on the streets trying to maintain control and ensure the safety of the mini-buses that are still running. Army trucks were also used to transport people along bus routes that had been closed down.

At La Casa de Mi Padre all of the staff left early these past 2 days to ensure that we made it home in good time. In some ways I feel as if I am giving into fear and giving the gangs power by following their commands, but I am not going to risk driving around the city when it is not necessary. Last night I skipped going to Bible Study (if it was even happening). I did hear on the radio that some churches were holding their regular services tonight. I was rather glad to hear that because it means that people are living their life and not giving in to fear.

Hopefully tomorrow the halt on the buses and the curfew threats will be over and the government will have control over the gangs. I am not sure that the solution will be so easy though and so I continue to pray for peace. For many who lived through the war in El Salvador in the 80's, the curfew is bringing flashbacks of life back then. To be wise and prudent but to not be controlled by fear, that is the challenge on hand. I think of the Psalms and the reminder that the Lord alone is my rock and my salvation, of whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life... That is what we must remember.

The Reality of Gangs

2010-09-07T11:44:00.000-07:00

September 7, 2010

Today the reality of the gang activity here in El Salvador is hitting home. I do not understand all of the details as to the why (perhaps because bus drivers are not paying their "rent" or extortion price), but apparently the gangs are upset. So they have stopped all buses, threatening to burn them or destroy them if they run their regular routes through the city or around the country. In a separate incident, the police just found 10.2 million dollars in barrels that comes from narcotrafficking.

I had no idea what was going on with the halt of transportation until I got to work since I have my own car. I soon discovered though that the tios who were to begin their shift today had not arrived, nor the driver.

I ended up spending most of the morning with Ricardo, playing, singing, and coloring. The housemom had taken Emmanuel with her so there was only one little boy to take care of. When I heard that the tia Loida might not make it in because there was no transportation, I began to consider what life could be like the rest of the day and night as I cared for the two 2 year-old boys and Salvi who is four and has autism. I will confess that I was relieved when Loida arrived at lunch-time.

From the sounds of it (though we are trying to confirm whether it is just a rumor or not), the gangs are also imposing a nationwide curfew. During the war in El Salvador there were curfews and no one could safely be out on the streets after 5:00PM. I pray that the curfews are not that extreme today. The events of today are reminding me that this is a country still torn by violence and corruption. Please be in prayer for El Salvador -- for the government and for the people.

What is the Most Contagious Thing in the World?

2010-09-02T09:19:00.000-07:00

September 2, 2010,

According to a children's book that I read the other month with some of the children here,it is not the yawn, sneeze or common cold but the smile that is most contagious. This morning I experienced that during my run. I was on my second lap around a park and passed an older gentlemen who I thought said "morning" the first time I passed him even as I said "Buenos dias!". This time his "morning!!!" (perhaps preceded by "good" but I could not make it out) was very clear. He declared the greeting with one of the biggest smiles I have seen in a long time and with an enthusiasm that may have come from his pride in speaking English to me. I smiled back and returned the greeting. As I continued to run, I could not help smiling as I thought about the joy on his face. I found that I wanted to share this smile with others today and so I hope that as I spend the night in La Casa as a tia for th girls, I want to share a contagious smile that transforms the faces and lives of those around me. May we all be contagious with the smile and love of Christ today!

The Other Minor Disaster

2010-08-30T18:42:00.000-07:00

August 30, 2010

Jumping back to Friday, I returned to my apartment in the morning and decided to try and get a little more sleep. As I was moving the bedspread, I discovered that it was all wet where it touched the floor and that there was water all along the bed. There was a watermark on the ceiling that I did not recognize from before but I could not remember for sure. It has rained all night and though my window had been closed, I wondered if the rain had been the culprit. I quickly cleaned it up and settled in for a morning nap. Perhaps twenty minutes later I heard the sound of dripping water. I looked up to find water pouring out from around a light set in the ceiling. It was clearly not rain because the skies had cleared up and the smell of the water told me it was not the cleanest water. I called the people I rent from and they placed a call to the owner. Meanwhile I decided to go upstairs and find out what kind of water was seeping into my bedroom. A maid answered my knock and when I told her how water was coming into my apartment, she said that she would talk to her employer but they had been running water in the kitchen. Many kitchens or laundry rooms have what is called a "pila" and is where water can be stored and then taken out to use for scrubbing laundry etc.... They are more common to have on a patio than in an enclosed apartment.

In talking with those in charge of my apartment, I discovered that the owner would be coming by in the afternoon so I changed my plans around to make sure I was present. And in the meantime I had more cleaning and laundry to do than I had planned.

The issue was not resolved when the owner came since the cause seems to be the apartment upstairs. To fix the problem (and now the ceiling) will take some time as said the ownner today and so she will probably wait until I am out of town for a while. I spent the weekend in one of the other bedrooms since I was not sure the upstairs neighbors would refrain from using their pila or get the issue fixed. I think I will stay put for a few more days since I do not fancy waking up to dirty dripping water.

Thankfully the rest of my Friday went well even though I was in the kitchen. The bread and other food turned out well and I enjoyed visiting with a friend that evening over her birthday dinner. The best part of the day though was getting news from another missionary friend that a situation I had been praying about worked out well and a friend had taken the confrontation calling her into accountability well.

Looking back on Friday with a Monday perspective, I see that my "disasters" are still so minor compared to many others. Today one of my co-workers had important documents stolen out of car while it was parked in front of La Casa. The other week someone stole the registration card out of our micro-bus. Those are situations with even more headaches than my leak which I am ultimately not responsible for. As things continue to happen that slow down ministry and program or discourage the staff, it does seem that there is spiritual warfare going on. Actually spiritual warfare is always going on, sometimes it is just more intense than other times. These past seven months I feel like I have seen a lot more of the warfare than at other times in my life. And so I realize even more the importance of wearing the armor of God and being equipped, praying in all occasions. Of course that is all much easier said than lived out, but I pray that the Lord will give me the strength that I need to stand firm in trials and to be a support to those around me.

Who Knew Sisters Could Carry On a Conversation in Their Sleep

2010-08-29T19:42:00.001-07:00

August 29, 2010,

This past week I spent two nights at La Casa de Mi Padre while one of the tias was on vacation. I ended up with the four girls, ages 7-10, who also happen to be four of the most rambunctios girls. On Tuesday Claudia turned 8 and so she was flying high all day. Unfortunately it did not cut down on her tattling and fighting with the other girls and so lots of bickering happened between the girls. That night after a crying spell by one of the girls, they all slept pretty well, as did I. Thursday night for me was another story.

Thursday afternoon we had a group session with the girls to talk about how they were feeling with regards to the upcoming changes with one tia leaving and their tia moving to work with an older group. Every group session with them is one of a kind because most of them are in another world and ask questions that make you wonder if they have any idea what is going on. That afternoon was no different but we finally wrapped up the group with them excited to do one last excursion with their tia in the next weekend or so. Their desire is a sleepover at the house parents home. I thought of inviting them to my apartment but their is so much glass and their energy level so high, it might be dangerous.

Anyway that evening I had offered to wake up the medium girls at 4:00AM to start their showers even though my did not have to get up until 5:00AM. I had the whole day off on Friday so I figured I could afford an hour less of sleep more easily than the other tia on duty. Well, I discovered that I was awake at nearly every hour that night for some reason or another. One of the thing I noticed was lots of noises coming from the girls. The sisters, Abby and Erika, were frequently talking in their sleep and at least once I am pretty sure that they talked to each other. At 3:00AM I was so hungry from having been awake too much that I went downstairs to eat some oatmeal I had there. 4:00AM finally came and then 5:00AM. By 6:30AM the children were off to school and I was on my way home to rest at the apartment -- or so I thought. I will explain the new disaster in the next blog entry.

A Birthday Dinner

2010-08-29T19:21:00.000-07:00

August 29, 2010

Since I could not be a part of my nephew's one year birthday party that took place today in Millersville, I will take the moment to catch up on a birthday that I did participate in last week. Last Sunday I invited the six Hernandez children to my apartment for the afternoon and dinner. They are still suffering from the loss of their little sister just over a week before and so I wanted to give them the opportunity to get away from La Casa and experience something different. The children range in age from turning 8 to 21 years old. As soon as they arrived at my place, they wanted to watch TV. But for me, to let guests watch TV for their entire stay (really any of it to be exact) makes me feel like a horrible hostess. Instead I got them all involved in the game of "Imagine If" in which I tried to translate the cards to Spanish -- on the spot. It went pretty well considering the constant translation.

Afterwards I let them watch a little TV while I finished in the kitchen with dinner preparations. Two of the girls decorated the birthday cake that I had made for Claudia who was turning 8 on Tuesday. We enjoyed a Mexican lasagna and then the cake and ice cream. Claudia was all smiles as she got to blow out the candles and enjoy her very own cake. Right after dinner we had to head back to La Casa, but it was a fun afternoon. One of the older girls told me that she wants to play the game with the older girls someday so I will try to work on translating the cards for real or better yet see if I can find the game in Spanish and then somehow get it down to El Salvador.

Minor Disasters

2010-08-21T19:21:00.000-07:00

August 21, 2010,

I find it interesting that after seeing victory on Thursday evening in that we at La Casa de Mi Padre saw that God is going to bring good out of the terrible death of the young sister of children here at the home, my last day and a half have been filled with one problem after another. What is up?

Thursday evening and Friday we, as a staff, discussed the hope and faith that we have -- that which was intended for evil, God will use for good and for His glory in the lives. I am excited to see what God does in the lives of the children in the months to come. Tomorrow they come to my apartment for some food and fun. Considering there are 6 of them from age 7 to 21, it should be fun.

But beginning last night,I have encountered one disaster after another.(I recognize that the word "disaster" is a bit strong, but oh well.) After work on Friday I stopped by the grocery store and had checked out all of my groceries and pulled out my credit card but suddenly realized that my ID was not where it usually is. And there is no use of a credit card without ID. I went out to my car to look for it but in vain. I scrounged up what little money I had on hand and paid for 3 of my 20 some groceries. I then rushed home (as well you can in Friday evening San Salvador traffic) because I was sure that I had a Skype call for my class at 6:30. when I finally arrived home, I pulled out the chicken I had bought to prepare it for throwing in the soup I was going to make. I noticed a foul smell in the one piece but thought that maybe it was okay. Once I started boiling the chicken, I realized that it must be bad and so I had to throw it all out.

It turned out that I was wrong about the date for the phone call so I waited around the apartment for nothing before heading out to the store to go pick out my groceries once again. I then prepared a few things for the cooking I was to do today, but really I just wanted to sleep.

Saturday morning dawned rainy, but that was okay with me since I was planning to stay inside most of the day I walked out to the kitchen and discovered glass all over the floor. One of the glasses had fallen from the dish drain and shattered everywhere. As I was cleaning that up, I neared the freezer and discovered that the freezer door was cracked open and realized with horror that it was like that all night. Only the fruit in the door had begun to thaw out, but I was apalled at having wasted so much energy.
I proceeded to make my yogurt, which mostly went well. Mid-morning I headed out to go to the market for some fruits and veggies. I grabbed my keys and walked down the 4 flights of stairs to the parking lot. As I neared my car I looked down at my keys and realized that I did not have my car key. And yet it had been with the others when I picked them up at the door. I climbed back up the stairs and began to look around the apartment and in all of the bags that I was carrying. Nothing. Thankfully I found one of my spare keys, but I realized that I was not too happy to not know if I had dropped the key where someone else could have picked it up (even though only about 3 minutes transpired between my descent and ascent on the stairs). As of now I still do not know where the key and the remote to the car are.

Shopping was uneventful (thankfully)except that I do have to return a pan at some point because I discovered that it is already rusting and it was never used. Here in El Salvador returns are not so easy nor guaranteed like in the USA. I then spent much of the day baking and preparing some food for tomorrow with the children. I discovered the the muffins pretty much flopped but at least the birthday cake for one of the girls seems to have turned out okay.

The day is almost at a close and I pray that nothing more happens. I did not think I was stressed or over tired even though it has been a rather intense week. Maybe I am a little more out of it than I had realized. I am glad that as Anne Shirley says in "Anne of Green Gables", "Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it yet." And even better is God's Word which talks of God's mercies being new every morning.

Tugging at the Heart

2010-08-16T20:13:00.000-07:00

August 16, 2010,

This afternoon I went with Kathryn and a family visiting from the United States to the government run children's home here in San Salvador that is like the first string of defense. When children are taken from there home, they usually end up at this group home before being placed in another temporary or permanent home. It is somewhat the equivalent of Child Protective Services. The children come and go so quickly that the staff doe not generally learn their names and little is done to work with them on their feelings and fears with being uprooted from their home and sent to an unknown place. Today we took crayons and coloring books with us to the home and ended up hanging out with the pre-schoolers and older girls with babies. I was interacting with two young boys who were clearly brothers and I noticed an older girl who was carrying for them. She said that they were her brothers. She is the oldest of seven children and they had all arrived there at CIPI this past Friday, or about 3 days ago. As I heard this part of her story, my heart hurt for her and her siblings. I had a feeling it was a pretty abrupt evacuation from their home. The little three or four year old boy, kept mentioning to me that his mommy and daddy were not there. Both of the boys had rather blond hair which in Latin America often reveals malnutricion because it is not the normal hair color.

After a while the one year old began crying and wanting his sister's attention. Because I doubted that she ever had much opportunity to be a child and color or do whatever, I offered to hold the little boy if it was okay with her. She nodded her head and so I picked him up. He immediately began wailing even more but I started walking with him and singing and just as quickly he quieted down. I probably walked for a good 30 minutes back and forth on the porch where we were, singing quietly to him. It reminded me of Honduras and singing to little Lisbeth. Though my arm ached by the time I returned him to his sister, I was thankful for that time with the little boy. It was a time to pray for he and his siblings. When I hear stories such as the ones of these children, there is a desire in my heart to take them all in to live with me. It would be impossible I know, but I also know that it is very unllikely that they will be placed together in the same children's home or in a foster home. I pray that their story will have a happy ending and that they will know Jesus love. Little Issac heard about it this afternoon though he is probably too young to understand.

A Very Long Week

2010-08-15T19:29:00.000-07:00

August 15, 2010,

So, I am finally getting around to writing, but I am pretty much making myself do so. At the beginning of last week I had a bunch of things at my fingertips for writing about, but then tragedy struck and life became too busy to do anything but fulfill my responsibilities at work. When Saturday afternoon came and I was free to go home, I had no desire to do anything but curl up with a good book. Today I deterred from that a bit by taking time to journal and sort things out and to do some baking.

At the start of the week I was excited to see that my times of reading with two of the young girls was also turning out to be an opportunity to help them work through things in their life or better understand who Jesus was. Even though we had just finished a busy week with the mission team, I still had energy. Long evenings of class work and then unexpected bad news on Wednesday began to change my perspective and energy level.

I guess that I had never really considered how working at a children's home would not only mean walking with children through the pain of their past but also walking alongside of them in the new tragedies that came their way. The untimely death of the little sister (who was not living at La Casa de Mi Padre)of a sibling group shook us all up to some extent. In those moments, normal schedules and work hours go out the window. I stayed late several days and then Friday night stayed overnight to be an extra person on hand in case the children needed someone to talk to that night since one of the tias was out sick. Throughout the week I have been challenged to not keep looking at the problem, the pain, the injustice, or the trials but rather to fix my gaze on Jesus who is my refuge and strength. Of course it is much easier to say than to do. Yet if I do not look at Him I will be overwhelmed by the violence here in El Salvador and the pain all around me. He is the only solid rock in the midst of a world that often does not make sense.

Tomorrow, if all goes well, I will have opportunity to share more of Christ as the Solid Rock with one of the older girls. The current plan (which I know could change) is that I will be taking her to climb a volcano with me. A conversation several weeks ago unearthed her fear of climbing mountains and as we talked, it seemed like a climb would actually be a very good thing for her and a way for her to persevere through trial and fears. I am praying that tomorrow will work out (or another day sometime soon)and that it will be a good time of encouragement and challenge. This young lady is at a crossroads, not knowing where to head in life, and I am praying that God will show Himself and His plan to her.

August Vacation

2010-08-08T07:38:00.000-07:00

August 8, 2010

Every August much of San Salvador shuts down as people head to the beach and enjoy what is known as "August vacation." Schools were closed all week so the mission team that was here from the USA had lots of opportunity to interact with the children of La Casa de Mi Padre. They put on a Vacation Bible School for the younger children while many of the older ones headed to camp with their church. Then on Friday we headed out to La Finca (the farm where the children's home will eventually move to) and played out there amidst the mud. Rainy season has continued to yield heavy rains this year and so although the mornings were dry enough to allow construction to happen on the new pavilion at La Finca, nearly every afternoon we encountered torrential downpours. The children enjoyed the soccer and volleyball at La Finca in spite of the muddy conditions.

I really enjoyed meeting this team from VA and the opportunities to share with them and be encouraged. One of the highlights was praying with a few of the girls before they left yesterday morning. We are planning to call each other in a year and see where God has taken us in that time. I also loved playing basketball last Sunday with the children and team at a park. One of the older guys keeps asking me when we will play again so I think that some Saturday when I am at La Casa for the family visit day, I will try to stick around a little longer and play some basketball with them.

Thinking about returning to a regular work week tomorrow seems a little strange, but I know that I will make the adjustment. I know that the week will hold it's own adventures, but they tend to be the less desirable kind because they often involve challenges. I guess you could say the week has already started off with an adventure in that I have no water in my apartment this morning and I have no idea why. Thankfully I discovered that before going out for a run and so I have postponed the run until a later time.

Though there is much more that I have wanted to write, I will have to do so at another time since I have some homework to work on for my Life Coaching course before church this morning. And maybe later my ideas will come back to me.

A Little of Everything

2010-07-24T19:46:00.000-07:00

July 24, 2010

Today, the final day of the week, I am finally taking the moment to blog about the most important events of the week -- the life giving ones because I know that I had the opportunity to be an extension of Christ's hands. Even though my travels to the States and Honduras were short and I did not rest physically, I seem to have come back refreshed in other ways and so while other staff members have been on the edge of burn-out, I have had the energy to press forward and help to balance them out. And I know that some day, they will be doing the same for me. Over the past week I have sat down with several of the older youth and chatted, sharing life stories and listening to where they are at in life. On Tuesday evening I hung out with the oldest boys, supervising them while the rest of the staff were having a group with the younger boys. Two brothers sat down with me to chat and after the one left, the other one and I talked for a long while about his anxiety over his upcoming graduation and then his desire to study missions. I discovered that at school he is nearly the only one in his class who does not smoke and drink and so he is daily faced with peer pressure and challenges. I was neat to get a glimpse into his life and to offer some encouragement to him.

Then on Wednesday I went with one of the older girls for coffee and we talked about how things are going for her at this point when her life does not seem to have much direction. I was excited to be able to share a story that I told for years during night hikes at Black Rock Retreat about considering that which we are actually listening or looking for. If we look for why our day is miserable, that is what we will see. Instead we need to look for what God is doing and learn to recognize the blessings from Him and His presence even in the midst of trials. Even as I shared with her, I was challenged to re-evaluate my perspective on things, especially some frustrations that I am facing for the week ahead.

One thing that I have begun to notice here at La Casa de Mi Padre is that God seems to bring different people into the children's lives at different times, based upon their need and who they will respond to. One week they connnect with a staff member and the next week, they do not want to talk to that person. I can definitely see the importance of the body of Christ with the various roles and gifts that can work together so perfectly to meet the needs of those around us and to glorify the Lord Jesus Christ.

This week I also spent a lot of time doing English homework and reading with a young girl named Elba. We are currently reading "Charlotte's Web" but in Spanish. Yesterday I listened to the Charlotte's long defense of spiders and their importance in life (of which I needed to tell my housemate today because she saw a spider in the apartment and hates them). What stood out to me though in the chapters that we read was that though Wilbur, the little pig who was about two months old at the time, had a taste of freedom outside of his pen, he was overwhelmed by the vastness of the world and was easily seduced to return to the pigsty with the bucket of slops that the farmer brought for him. When he crawled back into the pen, he felt like his little "house" was not so bad after all and happilly devoured the slops. Of course the very next day he awoke miserable and feeling friendless. I was challenged in the reading to be wary of the temptations that come across my path which call me back to my comfort zone (even though it may be a "pigsty") instead of pressing forward in what God is calling me -- as unknown and scary that it might be. I do not want to settle for "slops and pigsty" when God wants me to pursue Him into the uncharted waters.

Loss of Communication

2010-07-23T19:45:00.000-07:00

July 23, 2010

Many a day I wonder if I am still able to communicate with the world in any language -- be it English or Spanish. Today was one of those days. I was trying to help a nine year old with her English homework. Sadly at this moment she is so far behind that all we are doing is playing catch up which consists of filling in her workbook and never really taking the time to learn nor to understand the material. This afternoon she had to answer some questions about simple machines and one question was to identify the machine that records television shows. As I tried to help her with the question, I realized that I could not remember the word in English, nor did I know it in Spanish. I proceeded to ask one of the older girls if she knew the word since she is pretty fluent in English and her thought was video cassette. Knowing that was not the answer I was looking for, I went into one of the offices to ask a fellow American girl for the right word. Her thought was "VHS", which also was not what I wanted. About that time I went back into the study area and the children's tutor (a native Spanish speaker who knows some English) called out "VCR". And that was the word I had wanted. It is rather sad that two native Engilish speakers cannot come up with the word in their own language (It is very probable that the tutor found the word on the internet but still...). And yet so often I am at a loss for words in both English and Spanish. I feel that in some ways my communication with people in English has deteriorated over the past few months because so many times I have discovered that I have not communicated well the question or idea that I had. I guess that is a price to pay for filling one's mind with another language, but my goal is to communicate well in two languages.

All In a Morning's Run

2010-07-23T19:29:00.000-07:00

July 22, 2010

On Wednesday morning I set out for an early morning run and realized that a lot is going on at 6:00AM in San Salvador. Some of the sights that I see are rather disconcerting if I think about. As I ran through the neighborhood before entering into the park, I passed a house where three very armed men stood outside. I decided to cross the street at that point and not be too near any of them. It looked as if some important (or maybe just wealthy) person was about to leave in an SUV and the pickup truck behind that was probably to hold the body guards. I still have not quite gotten use to semi-automatic guns in the hands of so many people that I pass each day.

Leaving the armed guard scene, I turned the corner and came across a student driver and his instructor standing outside of the car which was parked between cones. Perhaps a greater danger than the armed guards on the roads that I run are the student drivers. The day before must have been trash day because the most common sight that morning was men rummaging through the trash bags in front of the houses, looking for plastic bottles or anything else that could be of value.

Once in the park, things calmed down and I enjoyed the beauty of the green area. I marvel though that I am the only person in the whole park who seems to run clockwise. I wonder if there is an unspoken rule about which direction traffic should flow on the sidewalk, but if there is, I am ignoring it. As it is, I find it difficult to pass people even when they see me coming. Sneaking up on them from behind would require even more waiting time as I would call out "permiso" every few seconds so that the walkers, three side-by-side, could clear a path for me.

Overall I enjoy the moments of getting out into the city to run and to pray. I have yet to run with anyone so my runs have turned into good prayer times. In some ways I hate to sacrifice that by finding a running partner though there is a girl in the neighborhood who I would like to run with one day.

What is the Cost?

2010-07-18T19:50:00.000-07:00

July 18, 2010

Though it has been a somewhat long week because of working so much, Lara and I decided to have the older girls over to watch part 2 of the Anne of Green Gables Series which I had brought from the States. After discovering that we still could not get our DVD player to work with the tv, we resorted to putting the movie on Lara's computer yet again. One of the purposes of having the girls over was so that they could watch the movie for real without the voices of ten other girls overriding the sound. As it turned out hearing the movie was still difficult, but I know that they enjoyed the opportunity to get out of the house, laugh and be silly, and to try some new foods.

In the minutes before I took them back to La Casa, they offered to live with me when Lara returns to the USA at the end of this month. They, of course, do not want me to be lonely and so they said that I can be their "adoptive mom." My inner thought was, well, it would be nice to give them a chance to live in a smaller home and get more individual attention, but I quickly thought of the responsibility of getting them to school at 6:30AM and all the details that would go along with being an adoptive mom. There are many sacrifices to be made in the life of a mother. And I tend to forget about them when I casually think about wanting to take in children. Jesus' call to die to oneself is, in my opinion, exemplified in the life of many a mother as they put their needs last and invest in the lives of their children and husband. I am very thankful for the example my mother has given to me. (Actually I suppose this should have been a Mother's Day post for my mom.) So the cost of motherhood -- be it natural, adoptive, or even just spiritual -- is high, but it is an opportunity to live as Christ and to represent Him here on earth as one lives out the call in Philippians 2 to both look to the interests of others and to take on the attitude of Christ. Though there is a cost, the reward can be great as you see your children (again in the physical or spiritual sense) walking with the Lord and pursuing Him with a passion. I think we are all called to be mothers and fathers, at least spiritually as we pass on our faith to those around us and disciple them in Christ. And so with these girls here in El Salvador, I do want to be a mom, probably one of many, in their lives for the time that I am here and serve them and love them.

A Million Questions

2010-07-13T12:37:00.000-07:00

July 13, 2010

Yesterday was my first day back at La Casa de Mi Padre after over a week of being out of the country. One of the tias was sick so I ended up covering for her during the day. After dinner with her girls, I felt that I had been out of the country for much longer because of all of the questions they bombarded me with. The dinner conversation ranged from questions about my family to questions about angels and demons. My favorite question from the one little girl Claudia was, "Do you and Lara (my housemate and an intern here for the summer) pray together every night before bed?" The custom in each of the rooms is to have devotions and pray together before bedtime. I explained that Lara and I go to bed at different times and so no we do not pray together. Her question got me thinking though about the many places I have lived and how I could be more intentional with my housemates about seeking God's face together.

During lunch today, I had some good conversation with one of the older girls who is on vacation right now. As we talked she asked about my studies in psychology and then she made a comment about how she always says things too bluntly. I shared the verse about speaking the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15) and how it is important to be able to share the truth with someone and even confront at times, but it has to be done in love and with prayer. In some ways the girl and I are at the opposite extremes. Too often I err on the side of love or compassion and am afraid to speak the truth. She, on the other hand, speaks the truth but without the love. I tried to encourage her because boldness such as she has can be a great strength and God needs people who are unafraid to speak up. But our strengths are often our greatest weaknesses too and so I know that both she and I need to work to submit what comes most naturally to God and allow Him to shine through us because of a willingness to follow His call and not just what is easiest. I am praying for some more opportunities to encourage this young lady and to share with her more in the next few days.

Surprises

2010-07-11T19:29:00.000-07:00

This recent trip back to the United States was another surprise visit for most of my family so I did not publicize the trip. I had originally planned to go to Costa Rica to renew my visa there but the people who I had wanted to visit were not going to be there over my travel dates and I needed to pass through Honduras so I would have had to add an extra flight or bus ride. I very much enjoyed seeing my family again, especially my little nephew Jack, who is nearing the stage of walking and is all around adorable.

I got in to Pennsylvania late Thursday evening and walked into my parents’ home much to the surprise of my mom. The next morning after playing basketball at Black Rock Retreat I headed north to a cabin where my family was going to be as well as their employees (many of whom are my extended family). In a grocery store in Williamsport I surprised my sister. I actually had walked off with Jack and my brother-in-law was going to tell Shana that someone had come by and asked to hold him and so he let the person wander off with Jack. Since I did not want her to panic, I decided to reappear before she could get concerned.

Finally I surprised Val there at the cabin. We had a good time in the creek and on the bike trail there in Slate Run. Early Sunday morning I headed back to Lancaster to share at New Danville Mennonite Church. The rest of the day I spent visiting with friends in Lancaster and from a distance watched the Long’s park fireworks. All week it was interesting to think that I had been in Lancaster last 4th of July but under very different circumstances. It had been immediately following when the Honduran president was removed from power and taken to Costa Rica. I went to the United States unsure of what was going to happen in Honduras in the next few weeks and months. Little did I know that a year later I would be living in a different country and working in a different field. I guess it shows how little we know of what lies ahead in our journey.

Monday was also a day of visiting with friends and also trying to get a little shopping done. My laptop recently developed a problem – it inserts commas when I type, thereby making me go back and erase them time and again. In talking with a few friends it did not seem possible to get the computer looked at in the short time that I was in PA but it was suggested that I buy an attachable keyboard. Since products such as that are generally twice to three times as expensive in Central America, I was glad that I had the opportunity to make the purchase in the US.

Tuesday I hung out at Black Rock and visited with lots of people down there as well as spent time with my family. And of course I was up late packing to get ready for my 4:30AM departure for the airport. I am returning to El Salvador with a lot more books since some of the girls are wanting to read the Anne of Green Gable series and are going to attempt to do so in English. I am impressed with them because for some it will be pretty difficult to read and understand the stories in their 2nd language that they are still learning. I am bringing some books in Spanish too, such as the Narnia series. I hope to use these stories with some of the children that I am working with in reading comprehension. All in all my time in both Pennsylvania and Honduras was good though short in both places. I always find myself trying to do too much and see too many people and so I return to work tired. I hope to get unpacked, do some homework and then get to bed early tonight, but we will see.

Back In Honduras

2010-07-11T19:28:00.000-07:00

My time in Honduras went well though definitely it passed as expected – with the unexpected. Upon entering I got my 90 day tourist visa again which was what I was praying for. I arrived on Wednesday and as it turned out I was able to take care of my car registration and some residency paperwork that day when I arrived in Honduras and then first thing Thursday morning. My Plan A and B of rides out to camp had fallen through though and so it was with great joy that I learned some missionaries were headed out that way Thursday morning (40 minutes from when I got a hold of them) instead of that afternoon. And so I quickly packed and met up with them, making it to camp before I had anticipated. It was great to see the Williamsons again and the staff. The Williamsons were in the middle of finishing up the painting of the ceilings that had just been put in. I am happy for them that they should not have so many insects and animals entering the house because it is now sealed.

I was able to spend significant time talking with Evelin and hearing how she is doing. Before I left on Saturday, the Lord put a few things on my heart to challenge her with. In some ways she is doing well but in another sense she is teetering. I am praying that she will fully pursue the Lord Jesus Christ again and make Him her number one priority. I have struggled at different times in my walk with God to put him first. So often other little things creep in that I want to focus on. I can remember specific times when I had to let go of things like basketball because they were beginning to control my decisions instead of God. I pray that she learns, without too much heartache, how important it is to have God first. As He says in Exodus 20 when He gave the Ten Commandments to Moses, He is a jealous God and there is no room for other gods in our lives if we desire to follow Him. He continues to watch out and care for Evelin, including in some close calls on her motorcycle and I pray that she can see that and understand just how much He loves her.

Travel In All But a Boat

2010-07-11T19:21:00.000-07:00

July 11, 2010
I am southward bound again. I have found travels to be interesting this past week as I have observed people. On the first leg of my journey last Thursday (July 1)
I found myself in a very long security checkpoint line after clearing customs. There was a security work near the front who would call out words of encouragement to everyone and try to lighten the mood. I think he brought smiles to quite a few weary travelers. When I finally cleared the checkpoint, I grabbed the tram to my terminal since I did not have much time left. I was there holding onto my pole when a jolt sent the man standing next to me falling in my direction. He somehow righted himself before completely falling and crashing on me. I realized that everyone around me was ready to spot me (they must have been on Ropes Course elements in the past) though really it would not have done much good had he landed on me.

I, like most others in the airports, am always trying to move quickly and to arrive in time to my gate or to quickly get my baggage and get out of the plane and airport. My return to Honduras was maybe a little slower pace with less need to hurry. I knew that I would be arriving in Honduras to the unexpected. I had specific details that I needed to take care of but I was not really sure when or how, nor how I would make it out to camp.

Today’s travels are that of the 7 hour bus ride from Honduras to El Salvador. So far things have gone well and when I take the time to look out the window, I am greeted by some beautiful views. Much to my delight the DVD player is broken and so the bus is not overrun by the loud movies playing – movies which I discovered from the last two trips are generally not ones that I want to be watching. I am enjoying the time to read, write e-mails and blog entries, and reflect on this past week’s travels.

The Call of the Ocean

2010-07-10T10:19:00.000-07:00

July 7 2010
About two weeks ago my roommate and I headed to the beach one rather rainy, dreary Saturday and enjoyed a quiet day there reading, writing, and swimming. Swimming in the pool, not the ocean that is. I took a stroll along the ocean and found myself mesmerized by the violent waves that were crashing into the shore. In the time that I walked one length of the beach and began to return to my starting point, the tide was rising and I had to move closer to land. I knew that I could not even begin to fathom the power behind those waves. They had warned us at the entrance that the ocean was dangerous that day with its currents and the pull of the tide. The shoreline was strewn with large pieces of driftwood that had been washed ashore but were still buffeted by the waves from time to time.

As I walked along the ocean’s edge, I found myself wanting to enter into the water more than just ankle deep. It was as if the waves and water were calling me deeper. But I knew to enter in was just plain foolishness. A motorboat that had been trying to get past the point where the waves were breaking had struggled and I have less power than that for sure. And so although I wanted to try the waves and see how dangerous they really were, I kept walking and returned to my point of observation. My mind wandered a bit as I considered analogies and I realized that sin can have that same pull. Though we know better and good judgment says to stay far away, there can still be a strong pull, especially when we get to close to the place of temptation in the first place. The closer I got to the water, the more I wanted to get in and see just how well I could withstand the waves. And so I was reminded to stay far away from those things which tempt me to walk in the ways contrary to God’s calling on my life and his commands.

Summer Days

2010-06-24T07:47:00.000-07:00

June 24, 2010

This week reminds me of summers long ago when I had vacation from school and life was carefree. Not that the week has been carefree in any sense of the word, but because the children are on vacation this week, my schedule has changed and I find myself with more time to enjoy fun activities with the children. There are no team meetings nor group therapy times. Instead we have planned activities to give the children a break from the normal routine. Monday night a few of the girls came over to my apartment for a sleepover. Wednesday I made soft pretzels with both the boys' and girls' home. Last night and tonight we are watching my favorite movie of all times, "Anne of Green Gables." I did discover while watching it with the girls that I have a new perspective on it as I try to perceive the movie through their eyes -- the eyes of children who understand the pain of Anne as an unwanted orphan. Many of them have felt unloved and unwanted.
Today we have a soccer tournament in honor of the World Cup. For me it has been a good chance to build relationship with the children and connect with them. I have always loved the quote, "You can learn more about a person in an hour of play and in a day of conversation." (or something to that affect) I seem to have lost my camera cord for downloading pictures to my computer so it may be a while yet til I can post pictures from the week.
The vacation week came at a perfect time because last Saturday the mother of three of our children passed away after a battle with cancer. The children and several staff members went to the burial service on Sunday. For these children it is a blessing not to have to jump right back into school and studies but rather to have some time to grieve and readjust to life. They are precious children and it is difficult to see their pain but I am thankful that they have so many people to walk alongside of them here at the home.

Country Wanderings

2010-06-13T19:58:00.000-07:00

June 13, 2010

Today Lara (my roommate) and I made the hour and a half drive to the town of Suchitotto, situated on El Salvador's largest lake (but an artificial one). Since I was tired from the week, I was hoping that we kept it a rather low key day and that is exactly what we did. We got to see a little bit of the colonial town before hiking a mile outside of the town to see the waterfalls, Los Tercios. The guide who went with us shared about the history of the town -- a place torn apart by the civil war years ago.

Because the rainy season is only just beginning, the water falling over the rocks was not a ton but it was still beautiful. Many of the rocks were cylinder shaped or pillar-like, giving the waterfalls their own unique structure. I was able to go and stand at the very edge of the waterfalls and look down at the river below. Walking towards the falls it looked as if one might just drop off the end of the world. I of course was careful so as not to drop off. Standing there though reminded me that I feel as if I am on the brink of change in the light of the things that God has been revealing to me. He wants to change my heart and attitudes and even the way I relate to people. I am standing on the edge, getting ready to jump into all that God has for me, no matter what the risk is.

After the hike we went down to a restaurant on the lake and there we settled down for the afternoon, making time to read and journal. I will mention that I was going to that which I never do and order tilapia instead of my customary grilled chicken. I had placed my order and everything when I suddenly thought to ask the waitress if the fish came with eyes and head. It did so I quickly cancelled my order and returned to the regular chicken. At least I attempted to try something new though. I loved the view from the restaurant and the breeze and it was perfect some time of reflecting and praying about what God has been teaching me.

Anytime I drive somewhere new, I am met with surprises on the road. My first surprise today came when all of a sudden in the left hand lane there was a barrel and I had to get over to the right. Immediately after that I saw that there was now oncoming traffic in that left lane. The problem was that there had been absolutely no warning. No signs were in place mentioning that it would be a good idea to move over. No caution signs warned drivers to maintain there position in the right lane. There was simply no communication as to what the barrel stood for and so I saw the whole situation as potentially dangerous. On the drive home, we saw that there had been a landslide closing down the other two lanes and that was the reason for the traffic merging together. The changes were much more clearly marked coming the other direction.

Another discovery in my driving was that the small towns do not mark which streets are one way. It seems that you have to guess and hope that you are correct. I am sure that there are some rules, maybe rules that apply to every little town, but I have yet to figure out what they are. Thankfully I did not appear to go the wrong way on any street and all was well.

Upon our return to the city, we lost power for about 45 minutes. It came back on for a little and then went back off. I had resigned myself to an apple and granola bar for dinner since there was no electric and I did not want to open the fridge. But then the power came on and stayed on. From what I am hearing there was a blackout in all of El Salvador and Honduras. I have no idea of the reason but it reminded me of my many days of power outages at camp in Honduras. The challenge here in San Salvador is that I do not expect the power outages and so I am not as prepared. It took me a while to find a lighter to light the candles and then I broke it so hopefully we will have power until I can get to the store and find some matches. I am reminded that I have much to be thankful for though in that power outages are a rarity these days in my life.

Moments with the Children

2010-06-12T14:45:00.000-07:00

June 12, 2010

Here I sit half watching the USA vs. England soccer game, half chatting with Lara, my roommate, and trying to write a blog entry. Multi-tasking would sum up the moment. I just got back from a workshop at church about the different learning styles. All of the volunteers with the children’s Sunday School were supposed to attend. It was a good workshop but because of a long couple of weeks at work, I was incredibly tired. Thankfully I managed to stay awake and did learn a few things.

This past week at La Casa was a tough one in many ways. On Monday we learned that the mother of three of the children was moving in with other family members because she is in her last days of a battle with cancer. In reality she has not fought it much, and so she is going quickly. Several of the staff took the children to visit their mother the next day for what could be there last visit. They shared the message of Christ with her again but she did not want to have anything to do with Him. As of now the plan is to do another visit on Monday (and I think I will go along) so that the children have as much time with their mother as possible. For children (and in adults), coping with loss is difficult and the pain of these last days has been evident in their behavior.

I had several opportunities this week to spend extra time with the girls’ home. On Thursday I took some of the younger girls to a nearby supermarket to look for a cleaning supply. We made it a bit of a treasure hunt so they had fun in spite of it being a rather mundane task – at least for me (but then I am leave the walls of my apartment all the time and have the freedom to go where I want). Friday afternoon I baked cookies with the 12-14 year olds. I am also dedicating more time to one of the girls in particular – Elba. I have been working with her in reading comprehension for the last month and now I will begin some tutoring in English as well.

One of the things that encouraged me most this week was a conversation I had with two of the older boys, Alejandro and Salvador. They were talking about their dreams with schooling after graduating from high school. Alejandro, who still has a year and a half left, wants to become a chef and he said that he would like to have a restaurant here in San Salvador. He would then bring meals to the children’s home every Friday as a small way to give back to the ministry for all that he has received. How encouraging it was to see his heart and attitude!

The Recapse of the Mission Team

2010-06-06T17:17:00.000-07:00

June 6, 2010

As I mentioned in the previous blog entry, we had a missions team here this past week -- a youth group from Georgia. Because I was quite involved in their schedule (some translating, leading the campout/cookout, and helping with controlling the erosion at the farm), I have found myself pretty exhausted this weekend. I have had way too many late nights. We were very blessed to have the team here though. The work we did with diverting some of the erosion which was soon to cave in the drive out at the farm came just in time because the very next day Tropical Storm Agatha entered the picture and we had lots of rain. It was also that next day that we were slated for camping out at the farm. We had a few hours of sunshine that Friday afternoon and so we put up tarps in case we could sleep outside as well as got the fire pit ready. About that time the heavens let loose and the rains came down. With much struggle we were able to get the fire started -- and without gasoline. I may have had a little too much pride involved as we were worked on the cooking fire because an uncle of two of the girls in the home was also on the farm that night and he helped get the fire laid. But the typical method of building a fire here is, throw a bunch of sticks (and large ones at that) on a pile, pour on gasoline, and throw the match on top while jumping back. He tried that once and it did not work so when he walked off for more gas, we re-arranged the sticks to make a "real fire." (I had enough classes in Outdoor Cooking, Education, etc... to value a fire built without the help of "explosives." The uncle was convinced that in the rain the gas was necessary and I said that it was not. In the end we started the fire without more gasoline, but we did use a lot of newspaper and dryer lint.

By the time we retired to our places to sleep that night (the girls in the chapel and the boys in a room in one of the little houses), we were soaked and tired. I had led a few teambuilding activities in the chapel and then shared my testimony with the group. That night as I lay in the hot chapel (there was no ventilation other than where air entered in the cracks around the windows -- open windows would have meant that rain, animals, and/or people could have entered with no problem), I struggled to fall asleep, but I realized that I could be thankful for having a dry place to sleep. I knew that many people in the town just below the farm were probably experiencing leaks and flooding that night from the storm. At one point when I looked out the window I saw an opposum climbing up a nearby tree. Had the windows been open, it probably would have joined us inside.

On Wednesday the team took care of all of the children during the day so that the childcare team could go and have a short retreat and rest. We went to a place at the beach where there were some beautiful pools. After a team activity and devotional, we had time to play or rest. I enjoyed hanging out with the other staff in a relaxed setting. Because the ocean was pretty dangerous that day, most of us stayed up by the pools.

Thursday I went with the team to a community almost at the border of Honduras where the mother of one of the boys lives. She use to live on the side of a garbage dump until La Casa de Mi Padre along with Habitat for Humanity built her a new home. From there we went with a pastor up to a community in the mountains where he is working to start a church. I went with the pastor and two of the youth to several houses, handing out food and inviting them to church. One woman that we met, Sophia, was very clearly saddened by life and struggling. We shared with her about Jesus and the peace that He offers but she was not ready to make any changes in her life or surrender to Him. I found it challenging to enter into random homes and start talking to the people there but I know that it is good for me to do. Sharing Jesus is much easier when you have built a relationship with someone though and there is a basis for which you can speak into their lives. Still it was a good experience and good exposure for the youth.

Besides all of the mission team events, there were other farewell parties, the family visit, and personal farewells for me this week. This morning I taught Sunday School for 19 two to four year-olds at church. I did it mostly in English since several of the children only speak English but I found myself forgetting and switching over to Spanish which complicated things for the other leader who was translating. As usual the children were running around the room a lot and even activities that called for their active participation were not enough to keep them in the right part of the room. It would help if we did not give them chocolate cookies the minute that they walked in the door. I think I will try to suggest that to the other leaders in two weeks when we teach again.

Since I need to leave in a few minutes, that is the recapse for the moment. Hopefully I can touch on some other things that God has been doing in a future post.

Singing In The Rain

2010-06-06T17:00:00.000-07:00

June 6, 2010

For those who did not get a chance to check out the blog of La Casa de Mi Padre, here is a post that I wrote regarding last weekend -- the events and the rains.

The past few days here in El Salvador have been laden with heavy rains as the Tropical Depression Agatha hovered over Central America, dumping its water on Guatemala, El Salvador, and Honduras. With the rains, came flooding and so life at La Casa de Mi Padre took a different turn on Saturday. A mission team from Georgia arrived at La Casa de Mi Padre late morning to share lunch with the children and also lead them in some games and activities. This team had just spent the night out at La Finca and hence had already spent several hours in wet clothes and shoes.
In the girl’s home the drains on the two patios had clogged up and the water seeped down only at a very slow pace. They were not keeping up with the torrential downpours. Before lunch several of the tías, children, and members of the mission team formed a “broom brigade” and used the brooms to sweep the water through the dining hall and down to a level where it would run into the street. During lunch we noted that the water in the backyard continued to rise and was nearing the door to the boys’ home. Mid-afternoon, in the midst of still more rain, the boys, tíos, and youth from the mission team waded out into the backyard and began the second “broom brigade.” Their task was much bigger than that in the girls’ home but they attacked it with a smile and a vengeance. At some point the shoveling and sweeping of water changed into more of a water fight than anything else. Several of the boys also discovered it was a great place to do handstands, and so they played in the muddy water, contentedly.
As I watched from the schoolroom window where the older girls and I were playing some games, I was impressed by the attitudes I saw exhibited in the boys. I heard no complaining that they had to work in the rain. They simply went about the task and made it into something fun. The youth from the United States and those from El Salvador worked side by side to prevent flooding in the boys’ home. Communication was limited because of the language barrier but I know that what the youth from Georgia communicated without words was that they cared about the children from the home and they were willing to get drenched and muddy yet again to help slow the rising water level.
Today as I came to work, there were the boys again, this time digging out the drains and all of the mud that had accumulated there. They were still smiling and proudly told me all that they had done – and this by 8:00AM. Thankfully today dawned with bright sunshine and though there are still threatening rain clouds in the sky, we are praying for continued relief from the rain throughout the country.

**The weather did clear up on Monday and thankfully things have had a chance to dry out over this past week.

Catch Up

2010-05-27T20:24:00.000-07:00

May 27, 2010

Time to do a little catch up on the blog before heading "into the wild" for the next few days. Tomorrow I take the mission team that is here camping on the farm (where the future children's home will be). The original plan was to sleep under tarps but a tropical storm has moved in and we have been getting rain for several days straight and it is supposed to continue. This kind of rain is usually seen at the end of the rainy season and not in May. At any rate with the kind of tarps we have and the severity of the rain (not to mention the frequency of thunder and lightning) the sleeping otuside does not seem to be a good idea. Plan "B" is to stay in two of the buildings on camp which are still rustic and will lend themselves to an "out of the comfort zone" experience for the youth. We are praying that the rain lets up (and the driveway dries out) for Saturday so that the children can come out to the farm for an outing. Otherwise the team will be going to the home and we will do indoor games with the children. But it is good for both the staff and the children to get to leave the home and have more space to run around.

Today I was out at the farm working with the team to slow down the erosion that is happening. Lots of area was graded for construction and now that soil is being carried away. On Monday an Environmental Engineer will be bringing some supplies so that on Tuesday we can do a more permanent job with stopping the erosion. Today was only a temporary fix as we dug channels to divert the water from its current path and moved lots of soil. It was fun to work in the rain for a change instead of being under the blazing sun.

I just realized that I never wrote nor posted pictures from my awesome hike at Volcan Izalco the other week. I will have to do that when I return from the weekend with the work team and children. Life has been very busy and e-mails and blogs have gone by the wayside. I have continued to enjoy some good connections with the children at La Casa de Mi Padre. We had another Family Visit Day last Saturday and I again helped with the logistics and an icebreaker for the new Parent Group. Many in this group of parents suffer from lower IQ or psychiatric illnesses and so the activities have to be adapted for their comprehension level. It went pretty well though. One of the sad things going on with several of the families right now is serious health issues. The mother of 3 of the chidren here at La Casa is in the last stages of terminal cancer. The children had the opportunity to go to visit their family last week but they have a long road ahead of them as they prepare and then grieve. And we need to figure out how to best walk with them through this journey.

One other thing that has been happening these past 2 weeks has been the opportunity I have had to share my faith with a girl I got to know through the guesthouse where I lived this past month. I sense that God's reason for having me there was so that I could begin to plant some seeds in her heart. She went to church with me last weekend and on the ride there I was able to share the gospel message with her. She has been curious but not with a curiosity of searching for the truth. It would seem that her she is content with her life as it is and does not see a need for God. She will be leaving in a week for Spain again and I am praying that as I hang out with her one or two more times that she will hear what she needs to here and then that the Lord will bring other people into her life to continue planting and watering seeds until the time is right for a harvest in her heart. It is in His timiing and not mine.

Bits & Pieces

2010-05-15T15:45:00.000-07:00

May 15, 2010

Once again I sit down to actually write a blog entry and cannot remember all of the ideas that I had floating around in my head from the week. It has been a good week, with some long days. Today I spent part of the day at the school where the majority of the children attend. They were having a day of Intramural competitions and I went to support them and also help out with selling whatever the parents of each class were assigned to cover. I did not have to do much selling, so that was nice. At the end of the afternoon I was on my way out, when I noticed some people playing volleyball. I went over and joined and soon there were 4-6 children from La Casa de Mi Padre playing. After a little while, the heavens let loose with a very brief but very wonderful rain shower. These past few days have been intensely hot. So much so that I do not want to do much of anything.

Yesterday evening I stayed late at the home to bake a mango dessert for the children and staff today and I realized that the kitchen is not a good place to be on a hot day. A couple of the older guys helped me to peel and cut the mangos and it proved to be a good time to chat about movies and music (which of course I know very little about) but I was able to share why I like some movies (and the analogies they contain) and why I do not like the majority of the others. I am looking forward to cooking with each group of girls in the coming weeks.

This past week I was much more intentional in my reading with one of the young girls, Elba. I received some good ideas from a good friend who is an Elementary Education teacher and feel better equipped to tackle helping her in her reading comprehension. I love to read, and I am excited to help a child find that joy too or if nothing else, at least learn to understand what she is reading.

I was more directly involved in the majority of the groups this week in both the guys' and girls' home. Some went well, others did not. The medium to young age boys were a bit out of control and unfocused and so even though the activity that I had for them was active, it did not work. I am praying for some good ideas for next week. My time with the oldest group of girls' though went really well and I was encouraged that I am getting to know them better and developing more trust with them. So overall it has been a good week. Oh and on top of it all, I have been having some good conversations with a girl from Spain who is not a Christian and who feels like her life is fine without God. I am praying that God will give me wisdom in what to share and say and that above all, she will experience God for herself so that there will be no room for doubting not only His existence, but also her need for Him. Tomorrow I get to go hiking with her and probably another Christian girl so I am hoping that the day lends itself to some good conversations.

Redundancy

2010-05-09T21:36:00.000-07:00

May 9, 2010

Sometimes I think that I must be a slow learner because the Lord has to use repetition to get me attention. He knows just how and when I need to hear the same thing again and again. Today's sermon was like that for me. It touched on the very themes that have been resonating in my heart for weeks. The title of the message was, "Do not give in to the pressure of the urgent." Basically it was a look at how we often fill our lives and schedules with that which is not very important or is not our job to fulfill. If I cannot ever say "no" when asked to help out in something, I will end up being over run with things to do, and really not doing so well in any of them. The final passage of the morning was what caught my attention because the Lord had already been talking to me about it -- Luke 10:38-42 where Jesus is with Martha and Mary and He points out that Mary has chosen the better option by choosing to sit at His feet. Martha, on the other hand, was busy running around the kitchen making dinner and being annoyed that her sister was not helping out. The pastor noted how our service for God will never be fruitful if it does not flow out of our communion with God.

Prior to the message I had been thinking of the passage in relation to the people around me and my relationships because I can easily become task-oriented and forget about building relationships. I found the sermon to be a good reminder of the most important relationship of all -- Jesus Christ. From my relationship to Him should flow my relationships with other. I found myself challenged once again to dig even more into pursuing intimate communion with the Lord Jesus Christ and then to take time for people. Details, work, etc... will always be here but people will not always be around. Over the past 2 weeks I have had the chance to chat with some people who were passing through in my life for only a short while. Even now there is a girl who I just met who I will probably only be around for another week or two. She does not know Jesus and she needs to see that I take time for her, to listen and to share in various ways. This afternoon I began to paint a picture of my faith and who Jesus is, but it is a conversation that I hope we can continue in the days to come.

The Little Children

2010-05-09T21:11:00.000-07:00

May 9, 2010

This morning was my second time helping out in the 2-4 year old Sunday School room at church. Things were a lot crazier today as there were more than 20 children of various ages and several who had no desire to sit and follow instructions or participate in the group activities. There were four children from the US who speak very little Spanish so I end up providing translation for them of the lesson (when they are listening that is). I am glad that my English does come in handy because so often I just wish that I could speak Spanish fluently, without having to think, and I forget to be grateful that I do know English very well (except when it comes to teaching the grammar rules as the youth often ask questions regarding their homework and I do not know the names of verb tenses, etc...) and Spanish fairly well.

On Wednesday of this past week, I finally had opportunity to make some finger paints to share with the two youngest boys at La Casa de Mi Padre. Ricardo loved the paints and ended up making footprints as well. He was pretty much covered in paint -- head to toe. Emanuel, on the other hand, was not so excited about the texture of the paint and after a brief encounter with it, he tried to stay out of sight in the corner so that he would not have to touch the gooey paints. When I made play dough the other month, Emanuel did not like that texture either. He is the one who is most delayed in his development and so we are looking for ways to stimulate him. Both boys loved the big pieces of white paper that I taped to the floor. They laid on them and I realized that we might have to take a pretend trip to the beach or something, using our imagination, "beach towels", and who knows what else. We will see what we come up with for this coming week.

One other event from this past week -- I was reading with a young girl named Elba who is in third grade. I found a book about "Frog and Toad" (which I remember from my childhood) in Spanish. As we were reading the short stories and then discussing them to see if she was comprehending what we read, I discovered that the characters can teach some good life lessons about perseverence, fear, failure, etc... With Elba's younger sister, I am hoping that the story about "The Little Engine That Could" will give her a little encouragement to keep moving forward even when things get tough and not to give up so quickly. I love to read and so it is fun to share a bit of that love with the children.

Two Sides to Every Coin

2010-05-09T17:35:00.000-07:00

May 9, 2010

On Friday one of the boys at the home asked me to guess "heads or tails?" I guessed wrong. Today I am reflecting upon the fact that nearly every cultural difference that I encounter has two sides - the frustrating side and then the side where I see the positive of a perspective different from my own. Last evening I began by being annoyed with how the 7:00PM meeting time turned into an 8:30PM departure.We were waiting and waiting for the rest of the people to arrive. At first it was at an Outdoor Mall which was a nice setting to wait. But then we moved to a gas station and I found myself very uncomfortable there as I saw other crowds of youth around, looking our way every time that they passed. I imagined a major gang hold up or something which of course did not happen. My problem was that I was tired by 8:00PM and I had hoped to be heading home by 10:00PM. As the time ticked away and we still had not left, I decided that going in a separate car so that I could leave early was not sufficient, I would simply skip out on the evening's activities.

But that is where the cultural perspective from El Salvador which seems to say that a large group sticks together, no matter what, kicked in. The plan had been to go to an area outside of the city where there are lots of little Pupusa restaurants (Pupusas are rice or corn tortillas filled with beans, cheese, and/or various other things and are one of the most popular and cheapest foods around) and a nice view of the city. Travel time and the wait for the food would have been significant enough that it was not worth me going, only to leave by 10:00. One or two other persons wanted to leave at an early hour but not as much as me. When I said that I would not be going along after all, someone proposed the idea that we go to a pupusaria in one of the neighborhoods nearby. They asked if I would go if everyone stayed closer and I said yes. And so the group gave up the plans of going to the pupusaria with a view and settled for a nearby one, all so that I could be a part of the group. Whether we would be as quick to do that in the United States, I am not so sure. I was touched by the group's decision to stay close and enjoyed some good conversations before leaving to get some sleep. Everyone else proceeded to a cafe at the gas station where we had been before. I needed sleep, especially when I awoke at 5:00AM for no reason. That is why I cannot stay out late.

I hope that I can see both sides of the coin in every cultural difference that I encounter because I know that one culture is not better than another. We all have our strengths and our weaknesses and therefore much to learn from each other.

Survival Skills

2010-05-06T19:36:00.001-07:00

May 6, 2010,

This morning as I was driving to work, I realized that using your horn is a necessary survival skill in Latin America. When I return to the United States, and forget where I am and use the horn, I get evil looks. But here, you have to use the horn to warn drivers that you are present and not planning to just move because they want to do something crazy. It seems to me that the last couple of days I have had to use my horn a lot because of the craziness on the roads.

In thinking of survival skills, I had to think also of cultural adjustments. It takes time to adjust culturally and then there are some things which will never quite seem right, though they are not wrong -- just different from what one is use to. For example on Sunday after church I went with a group of young adults to the small town of Ataco up in the mountains. We had 17 people going so it was enough to take a mini-bus instead of driving 4 vehicles. I was grateful not to have to drive and instead enjoy conversation and the scenery. When we arrived at the town, people began to talk about where to go. I asked if we were going to set a time to meet back at the bus.One of those who had helped plan the transportation said that he thought we would all just stick together. Seventeen staying people staying together translated into covering 1 1/2 blocks of the town in the 2-3 hours that we were there. Several of us wanted to walk up to a lookout by a church farther up on the hill, but we could never get everyone moving to actually make it there. For me it was an interesting experience because I like to be independent and not have to wait on groups of people. Perhaps that is also why I tend to like small groups more than large groups. I realized that if I want to go hiking and really see a National Park or something like that, I will have to make sure only a few people are going. Otherwise we will stop to take a million pictures, rest, and do many other things and never make it very far into the park.
This is perhaps where the other cultural/personality difference comes in. I like to get things done, whether that be work, seeing new places, or being active. In Latin America relationships are what are most important and are the center of everything else. It does not matter, therefore, if you only walk a block and half in a new town, because you are hanging out with everyone. I need to grow in the area of being more relational and so these cultural differences are good for me because they stretch me, moving me out of my comfort zone. The small group activities that I enjoy such as games and hikes I will simply have to plan as that -- small group time -- and not try to fit them into the larger group setting where dividing up into smaller groups is not seen as acceptable.

Here Come the Rains

2010-05-01T21:17:00.000-07:00

May 1, 2010

Here in Central America the saying "April showers bring May flowers" does not hold true because the rains do not arrive until May although this year we had a good amount of rain in April. April was true to its normal self though and was very hot. This morning I awoke in the early hours to the sound of rain -- the type of rain that you have on a fall day in Pennsylvania. By 6:30 the rain had passed and I went out for a run in a world that was drenched and alive. Apparently the rain did not really pass though because for a good portion of the day, the rains fell steadily. There were the fun moments when it was just a light mist and I was able to walk down the road to a little stores for some veggies, getting spritzed, but not soaked.

Besides it being a rainy day, it is also a holiday here in Central America, the equivalent of the US's Labor Day. Except here instead of parades, there are protests. Last night it took me 45 minutes to get home instead of 10-15 as it normally should. Whether it was due to the fact that protests were coming or simply that it was Friday and payday, the roads were a mess. At the intersections a light would turn green and no one could move because traffic from the right or left was sitting in the middle, not having gotten through on their green. I sat there and tried to pray, but found myself distracted by my frustration of not getting anywhere. Eventually I found it better to sing because that was something I could focus on.

This morning I planned to meet up with a girl from the US who is running a children's home north of the city, but as I headed to our meeting place, I found the roads blocked because of marches. I returned home and we met later on. It was neat to see her ministry and be able to share some of the program ideas from La Casa de Mi Padre with her and the other staff.

When I returned to the apartment after my first attempt to meet up with Rachel from the children's home, I ended up walking past a little coffee shop/bakery and went in to visit with the girls who run the place. They are twins and I met one the other day and this morning I was introduced to the other. I had a good time sitting and talking with her and look forward to running with her in the future. If I was in shape and had time, I could do a race with her tomorrow morning. As I left their store forty-five minutes later, I was excited about the new friendships. We can speak in either English or Spanish because at least one of the twins went to school in the States and teaches at the American school. They are experimenting with baking as they put together pastries to sell. I love to bake too and some day I think I will try to teach them how to make the Cream Cheese braids. Once again I have so much to be thankful for as I think about how the Lord is providing friendships (not to mention everything else He has done in my life).

A Blog Entry In The Making

2010-04-25T20:23:00.000-07:00

April 25, 2010

There are what I would call "blog moments" when I encounter something during my day that I know would make a good blog entry, if I could just remember it later on. Today my moment came as I sat with some friends in a little Swiss-El Salvadorean restaurant in the hills outside of San Salvador. We quickly discovered that half of the drinks and dishes on the menu were not available at this time. There was only one flavor of fruit drink, no ice tea, and no pudding. The owner had just given us a speech about how welcome were to be there and that we would enjoy the food and everything. When the waitress walked back to the kitchen just as soon as one of the girls ordered an iced tea, we had a feeling that there would be some "shortages" of options. Sure enough, the waitress had left to confirm that there was no tea. I know that I had a look of "here we go again" on my face because so often this happens in restaurants.

Because there was only whole milk for the hot drinks, I had decided not to order anything so I was not too disappointed with so little being available on the menu but another day I would have been. So much is run differently than in the United States which makes sense because it is a different place with its own culture. I am the one that needs to adapt. Though the food was lacking, the view was not, nor the fresh breeze that flowed through the open air seating areas. It was a welcome change from the humidity and heat of the city. We also got to hear some live music which included mostly songs in English from long ago, "The Piano Man" and "Hotel California" to name a few.

Bubbling with Thankfulness

2010-04-25T19:09:00.000-07:00

April 25, 2010

Yesterday the title of this blog most definitely described my sentiments. Today I feel mostly the same except that I am too tired to really know how I feel. It is hard to explain exactly why I am bubbling with thankfulness but I think that it stems from seeing God answer prayers. During my first few months in El Salvador I struggled to meet young people and find people to hang out with. This past week has been quite the opposite and it is such a blessing.

I was first introduced to the young adult group at the Spanish church last Sunday when we went to visit a nearby volcano and now this weekend there have been various get-togethers and excursions. I still have a long way to go in developing strong friendships within the group, but I am thankful that I am moving in the right direction.

Last week I also visited with lots of friends over birthday meals which was fun. In Latin America birthdays are a big deal and you can almost get the day off of work because it is your birthday. I did not quite get that far, but I did go out for lunch. All in all, it has been a good week and I am just very thankful at the moment.

With Gratitude In My Heart

2010-04-18T20:18:00.000-07:00

April 18, 2010

I suppose that maybe some day I might catch up on writing down the many things running through my head, but then again maybe not. Life has been pretty busy this past week and then this weekend I needed the time to relax and hang out with people.

As I look back on the past week, I am very thankful for God answering my prayers in two ways. First, my health has been much better, though I still need to figure out what has been wrong. And second, I have met a lot of new people and several of the relationships have potential for deeper friendships. On Friday I had lunch with a girl I know from my church and she mentioned that this Sunday (today) the young adults were going up to a one volcano to walk around. I, naturally, was excited about the opportunity. I went to church last night so when I showed up to meet with everyone, I was ready to be outside. I should have known though that in general in the Latin culture one dresses nicely, even to go on an outing which involves “hiking”. (I put hiking in parenthesis because it is more a of a walk at this particular park and not what I would consider a hike.) I was prepared though in case it rained the whole time because just before we left, the heavens did let loose the rain.

The weather turned out to be fine and I had a good time getting to know some new people. I will probably be switching small groups to join up with the young adult group since I can relate better there than in the small group I am currently in.

One of my projects this weekend (not exactly restful but necessary) was making yogurt yet again. My track record is not turning out to be so good because I think I only am at 50% for having the batch finish without separating. I also let this batch get too hot so I may have killed all of the good bacteria, but hopefully not. I should really try to find a yogurt maker because trying to regulate the temperature of the yogurt using the oven or the stovetop is difficult.

As I look ahead to this coming week, I think it might be the first week with a “normal” schedule once again. Over the last two weeks the Fridays have included activities out of the ordinary such as collecting grades or participating in a school rally (the latter of which was a cultural experience). There has been some culture shock the past few weeks as I have moved into the stage of questioning why some things are done in a way that makes absolutely no sense to me. The good news is that it is a part of the cultural adjustment cycle and I will probably move out of it soon. It will be good to work on getting back into a routine at La Casa de Mi Padre though I know that the unexpected always happens, and that is just how it is.

Since I cannot sleep in no matter how late I go to bed, I sign off now because I need to catch up on sleep and tomorrow is one of my mornings to be in at work early (8:00AM – which really is a normal work hour but for me I more often go in at 10:00AM).

Lesson from the Birds

2010-04-16T20:45:00.000-07:00

April 16, 2010

This morning I went with several of the other staff from La Casa de Mi Padre to the school where 26 of the children attend to help go to the classes and collect the grades for each student. I was assigned the four children from Kinder and Pre-Kinder and hence had the quickest assignment of all. After I finished talking to the teachers I walked up to the other part of the school and sat on a bench near the snack shop to wait. While waiting I noticed several large wrens flying from tree to tree in front of me. At one point the three wrens gathered together and sang for a short while.

Shortly thereafter two of the wrens moved to a branch almost directly overhead of where I was sitting. The one wren found a black string that was hanging from the branch and began to pull on it, trying to free it from its entanglement with the branch. Indeed in this particular spot there were several colorful strings twisted around the branch and so it appeared that some little bird had begun to make its nest there but then abandoned the site. I found it amusing watching the wren as it yanked on the string and even hung from it in it's efforts to free it. But the problem was that it was pulling on the end that was already free and was not doing anything about the knot at the other end. Eventually the wren gave up and flew off. As I watched the scene before my eyes I had to think of how many times I probably approach a problem or issue in vain because I try to deal with the easy part or the surface issues. It makes me think of the various readings I have done regarding children and discipline. All too often we try to just deal with the behaviors of the children and do not get to the root of the issue -- the attitudes or the state of the heart. I was reminded this morning that I want to be constantly evaluating my heart to make sure that I am free from entanglement with bad attitudes, sin, or baggage that I do not need to carry. I think of Psalm 139:23-24 and David's prayer: "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."

Tomorrow one of the tias and I will have a group session with the youngest girls and need to somewhat touch on this theme as we look at the enemies within ourselves. We get to use one of my favorite stories from the book, "Tales of the Kingdom" which I am excited about. I pray that we can clearly communicate the applications to them and that they can start to deal with some of the character issues. And of course I never know what God might say to me during the time too and what work He might want to do in me.

Smiles

2010-04-04T20:15:00.000-07:00

April 4, 2010

Over the past week of traveling, I have seen a few sights that made me smile. First, there is the beauty of God’s creation which of course I always love to see. But then last week when I was driving from Campamento Manantial de Vida to San Pedro Sula, I noticed alongside the road a sign for a funeral home. It’s name was “Funerales Milagrosos”. Translated to English this means “Miraculous Funerals.” As I read the sign I had to smile and wonder just how the funerals were miraculous. Did the funeral home offer the hope that the person would rise from the dead? To me it seemed a rather ironic name for a funeral home.

My time out at the camp was very short but I had a few hours to reconnect with the staff and see all of the babies and little children who are growing so quickly. Little Lisbeth has become fond of the camera and modeling for it though she needs to work on her style. At one point it looked as if she was poking her eye out instead of posing.

In Honduras I had to smile at the timing of the road reparations. Semana Santa happens to be one of the biggest weeks of the year for travel. Many people go to the beaches or mountains to celebrate vacation time. (Unfortunately the vacation has become more important than the reason for the time off). But last Sunday as I was driving out to camp I discovered that the road crews had chosen these days to work on repairing the roads, closing down one lane. For me there was not much of a backlog but I would imagine that depending on the time of day, people’s travels were delayed.

In Pennsylvania my smiles came from the beauty of spring and from seeing friends and family. My nephew had grown considerably and was adorable, freely giving smiles and kisses. Surprising my parents and sister with my return visit was fun too.

As I return to El Salvador I smile and give thanks because I received another 90 days to be in the country. I smile because I know that God has unexpected things planned for the days and months to come. I smile at the thought of seeing the children again and being a part of their lives. I also rejoice because in my conversation with Evelin this morning while I was still here in Honduras, I learned that she heard God speak to her this week through one of the sermons during the Semana Santa retreat at camp. And with having listened to God again, has come a new desire to pursue Him. Our conversation last Sunday was tough because of the struggles she has been going through but the Lord has given her hope. I smile at what that means for her and for Lisbeth (and really for the others around her because if she is living for Christ, her life is going to be a powerful testimony to those around her).

Yeah for smiles and all praise to our Father who created the smile and the reasons to smile. 

On the Road Again... and This Time on Easter Day

2010-04-04T20:14:00.005-07:00

April 4, 2010

Easter Day. I am passing Easter Day in a different way this year as I travel by bus from Honduras to El Salvador. I am hoping that it will be a six hour journey and not seven and a half hours as was the trip to Honduras. In the past week there has been some rain in Honduras and so the mountains seem a little bit greener. Still as I look out over the terrain, it is not one that really speaks of new life as would be most fitting for Easter Day. In PA I saw the new life of spring in the budding trees and emerging flowers. I enjoyed being serenaded by chickadees yesterday morning as I sat for a few moments on the bank behind my parents’ house.

Easter speaks to me of new life because Christ rose from the dead and fulfilled all of the prophecies spoken in the Old Testament of His death and resurrection. He defeated death and brought me new life – as long as I am willing to accept the life He offers. I chose to receive His gift of salvation many years ago as a child, but I am reminded that my journey with Christ does not stop at that moment but rather begins. I just read a friend’s update which spoke of the little “deaths” that we have to experience all through our life – the death of our own hopes and expectations, our plans, and our habits. If any of these things do not line up with God’s own plans and desires, I need to sacrifice them and put first His plans. I am reminded of that even more this weekend as I reflect upon Christ’s sacrifice on the cross for me – taking upon Himself my sins, that I might live in Him. It is with joy and thankfulness that I can proclaim today, “Christ the Lord is risen indeed!”

2010-04-04T20:14:00.003-07:00

2010-04-04T20:14:00.001-07:00

On My Way Again

2010-04-03T15:36:00.000-07:00

April 3, 2010

Here I sit an airport again. Sadly I am no less tired than when I began my travels last week. I do not think that I have ever passed a week so exhausted as this one that just past. I was behind in sleep before traveling and I have yet to catch up. Maybe I can catch up on the next flight – from BWI to Miami. After all I almost fell asleep on a puddle jumper flight from Lancaster. I do not think I ever flew on such a small plane. There were 2 other passengers besides me and then the pilot and co-pilot. I could have taken “first-class” seats which are really the seats just behind the pilot. It was a Cessna 402 plane and so it reminded me of all the missionary stories I have read of flying in and out of the jungle. I would imagine that they used a similar plane.

I was incredibly close to missing my flight in Lancaster because of underestimating the amount of time it would take to get there. Thankfully it is such a small airplane and flight that I probably could have arrived 5 minutes before take off and still made it. (Well, maybe not quite that last minute).

My time in Lancaster was good though short. I went in search of snow yesterday with one of my friends but the rocks at Shenk’s Ferry which had held snow late April probably 7 years ago hid only leaves this year. Nonetheless it was a good walk because of the fellowship and because of the beautiful trillium, Dutchman’s-breeches, Virginia blue-bells, and violets that were blooming. Even in the few days I was present in PA, I noticed more buds, leaves, and flowers appearing on the trees. I was glad to see spring again even though it was not yet in all its glory.

I found myself in at least one moment of culture shock. I had gone to the lab for some tests and I expected to walk in, leave the tests and paperwork, and walk out in five minutes. I also thought the results would be in the next day since that is what I have experienced in Honduras and El Salvador over the last 3 years. But no, the process was much more detailed and complicated and the trip that I thought would last 5 minutes took more like half an hour. When I asked if the results would be ready the next day the nurse said, no in 7-10 days. And so I wait.

The other thoughts that I have floating around somewhere will have to be recorded at a later hour when perhaps I am more awake and not in need of checking my ticket at the counter.

A Catch-Up

2010-03-29T08:43:00.000-07:00

March 27, 2010

So I begin to write my long overdue blog entry. I am writing from a bus as I pass through the southern mountains of Honduras. Even now I find myself distracted from completely focusing on writing because of movie that is playing having to do with a coach reforming a basketball team – their record and character.

Much has happened in the last week and a half. We have had many people passing through La casa de Mi Padre in the last few weeks helping in so many different ways. Last week I was a part of translating for the medical team. For me the neatest experience was when we offered a clinic for the community around the farm where La Casa de Mi Padre will eventually be built. The last woman of the day who we helped had many different ailments but what caught our attention most was her sadness. The storm that I had so enjoyed hearing just two nights before ended up soaking she and her son and all of their belongings because they are living in a temporary home covered by plastic laminates. That on top of a robbery and having to move from her previous home had taken its toll on her. We talked and prayed with her afterwards and shared the message of Christ and the cross. In past medical brigades we had worked with a local church so that there could be follow-up but in this case we were not connected to a church and so it follow up is more difficult. I have her number to call and check in but I hope to be able to connect her with someone in her community. A random event from one of the clinics was that a man sat down for treatment in front of me and he was wearing a black t-shirt with gold lettering that said, “SCS.” Those are the colors and initials of my elementary school in Florida. I had to wonder if it was a Sarasota Christian t-shirt that had found its way into his hands – probably through a donation at some point. If so, the world continues to be a small place.

This week a family from Texas brought probably a dozen instruments to share with the children. Many of the teens were especially excited about the guitars and for the rest of the week they could be heard practicing at various moments throughout the afternoon and evening. There was also couple of young ladies from Pittsburgh who shared on the topic of alcohol and drug addiction with the children and did some training with the staff.

I spent two nights at La Casa with the pre-teen girls and because of the early morning wake-up to get ready for school, I find myself very short on sleep. It has been fun getting to know them more. I cannot say that the discipline is fun, but it is important. One of the girls, Gaby, and I made Play-dough for the babies and they had fun touching it. Well, the one did. The other has some sensory issues and so he did not exactly like the texture.

Friday, the day before leaving for Honduras, I found myself both packing for my trip and unpacking from my move to a new apartment. Four medical students will arrive while I am gone to share the apartment with me for a month. It is in an area of the city that is a little safer for walking around and I am looking forward to running at the park just up the road. And because the apartment is on the fifth floor, it has a pretty awesome view of the city. I recognize that it might not be the best place to be during an earthquake, but I will not worry about that till it happens.
(I will have to add photos later because I still have not downloaded them to the computer)

The Quick Review

2010-03-19T13:11:00.000-07:00

March 19, 2010

For lack of time, I am going to only make a few comments on this week and save the stories and more in depth thoughts for later. It has been a very different week for me because of my involvement with translating for a medical missions team that is here in El Salvador working in the communities that the children from La Casa de Mi Padre come from. I was a tia for four of the girls on Monday and will be again tonight. Thank goodness that tomorrow is the weekend and they do not have to get up at 3:30AM because I do not think I could handle it. Tomorrow is another Family Visit day so there will be activities until mid-day with the children and families. In a little bit we head to a park to have pizza with the children and the missions team.

This week has been a battle for me as far as sickness but it seems like I might be finally getting better which is exciting. Many of the details for the medical team were a struggle this week because of things getting hung up in the government bureaucracy but in the end we were able to do all that was planned. I am glad to have met a bunch of new people this week from Virginia and PA and to see how God is working here in El Salvador through many hands and hearts. And that is is for the moment as I go get ready for the park.

The Culmination

2010-03-12T16:58:00.000-08:00

March 12, 2010

As Friday comes to a close here in El Salvador, it is a week of culmination. We ended the week by taking the children out to the farm (the future site of the Children's Home)and letting them climb on a treehouse that a work team built. The children loved it and seeing them scampering around in the tree, scaling the wall, and running around in the open air was invigorating for me. I love to see children out in God's creation.

On Wednesday I had the opportunity to help the team in construction of the tree house. Basically I used a drill to put in screws for holding down the floorboard and a few other small jobs. I have never seen a treehouse with such a gorgeous view. The farm itself is beautify and I am glad to know about it because I can forsee it being a place for me to retreat and spend time with God. I need moments out in His creation which I cannot find in the city.

The drive to the farm was interesting to say the least. We were one a major six lane highway when all of a sudden our driver pulled to the far right lane, stopped, and began backing up. I was reminded of a car chase I was a part of in Honduras when the drive also went in reverse on a major highway and I was pretty sure we would get hit. This time I was not so concerned because I had already served a trip in reverse back in Honduras. The driver told me that the sigsnthat had just been put on the van had fallen off and he wanted to go back and get it, for fear that he would be reprimanded for losing it. I was the only one who understood Spanish and knew what was going on. I tried to tell him that it would be better to just stop and someone could run back and pick up the sign but he did not seem to understand or think that was the best option. So we kept going in reverse and the guys in the back of the van began to get very concerned, especially as we began to go back around a blind curve and they had visions of us getting bashed from behind. One of the guys, a professional photographer, was quick enough to pull out his camera and begin video taping everything. Finally, out of panic, the guys in the back started yelling to "Go, Go!!" and the driver got the message and we went forward again. I explained that we were more concerned about our lives than the sign and someone saw the sign already in pieces since at least one car had run over it. But the driver, who is knew to the job, was understandably concerned by the sign because where he had previously worked he would have had to pay for the sign, which he probably could not have afforded. We made it safely to the farm but it was an adventure.

Yesterday I had a glimpse into an interesting cultural difference here in El Salvador. I was in a group session with the pre-adolescent girls and the one girl was asking why they needed to shower in the morning because several of her classmates showered at night and not in the morning. The house dad said that it is not good for you and that you will smell all day. I have wondered why some of the girls do not take showers at night so that they do not have to get up at 4:00AM before school. I now know why. I knew that culturally it is looked down upon to leave your house in the morning without first dressing up. To me sleep would be a valid reason to have half of the girls showering at night and half in the morning, but not here. And that is okay, it is just a cultural difference that I need to get use to, especially as I will be staying with those girls for a few nights over the next two weeks. I am not looking forward to 4:00AM mornings though.

The culmination of the week actually means the arrival of a medical missions team and more busyness in the coming week. I was going to move this weekend but I am not sure that the other apartment will be quite ready. Hopefully I can find time in the next week to pack up and move across town. I look forward to having more options in where I can run. This week there have been two teams here at the mission house where I currently am and though it has been fun to be able to play some basketball with people again, I will enjoy a little quiet again. My mind is blank as far as what else I wanted to write about so this is all for now.

March as it Flies By

2010-03-09T12:37:00.000-08:00

March 9, 2010

This month seems to be flying by. And it will continue to fly by as a whirlwind of work teams and extra activities outside of the normal daily schedule. This past weekend I stayed overnight at La Casa de Mi Padre once again, this time with the youngest of the girls. I brought the ingredients for making chocolate chip cookies and we had fun in that activity. It was a little crazy at moments trying to give 8 girls the opportunity to all play an active role in the cookie making process. The end product looked good though I sadly could not eat them since I am still trying to go without eating gluten to see if my health improves.

When I returned to my house on Sunday morning after being at La Casa, there were 18 people there -- two different teams. One is from Pittsburgh and the other from State College so I am surrounded by fellow Pennsylvanians. It makes cooking and such a little crazy but it has been okay. I have loved the fact that I had opportunity to play basketball with some of them the last two evenings. Sunday evening we played against a group of El Salvadorians that must play in the park frequently. We lost but it was fun.

Tomorrow I will get to go up to the farm where the children's home will eventually move and help with the construction project of building a tree house. That will be a fun change of pace too. Today there are lots of group therapy sessions and helping with homework. I am planning to make play dough soon as a tool for the two youngest boys to help with their stimulation. One thing that I have discovered is that they seem to lack toys that encourage stimulation and the use of skills or senses.

Sometime I will need to think about packing and moving to a different apartment this coming weekend, but that will probably not happen until Saturday. If I leave work early enough this evening I hope to get to the small group again with the one church and see about building more relationships with the people here.

Like a Child

2010-02-24T19:32:00.000-08:00

February 24, 2010

For a few moments today I felt like a little girl again as I skipped down the sidewalk with one of the seven year-old girls to move my car closer to La Casa. We “raced” to the car and she won. I enjoy such moments. Currently I am sitting in the living room of the girl’s home multi-tasking as I watch the El Salvador vs. USA soccer game. It is more fun to watch it amidst the screams of teenagers than alone in a house. I am trying to cheer for El Salvador (who is winning) but I find myself excited when the USA almost scores goals as well. I guess that I am in a good place – no matter who wins I will be happy.

This week I have had the opportunity to go with the staff to pick up the children at their schools and so I have gotten to see more of San Salvador. The children are spread out among at least four schools since some of the students need special attention. Going to the one school which is right near where I live helped me to solve the church mystery. On Sunday morning I ventured out of the confines of my street to run in the direction of a church I had heard and seen the night before. The worship had sounded good and I wanted to see if there was a church within walking distance from where I live. My run did not prove fruitful as far as finding the entrance to the church, but I did enjoy the freedom of running outside of the gates of the fence of the neighborhood park. What I discovered today is that the music I heard came from the church connected with the school and though geographically the church sits just above my street, you actually have to wind around to a street that I would not feel comfortable walking on to get to the entrance. At least I solved my mystery and I may just have to drive there to visit the church services.

I have also had time this week to dedicate more energy to the youngest boys who are both about 15 months old. I want to work with the tías to help them with the goals that they have for stimulating the boys’ development and see what resources I can find to help them out. As I continue reading the book Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and John Townsend (in Spanish), I am both learning about the different ages and what the boundaries should look like. I think that I may try to put together a presentation of some of the ideas for a childcare training (every Friday morning we have one with all of the childcare staff). I had been sharing some of the information with the tías of the youngest boys and girls this morning and they were very interested. The book is also challenging me personally and I wonder why I never got around to reading it before.

Finding a Routine

2010-02-22T18:11:00.000-08:00

February 22, 2010

I suppose it could be said that I am finding my routine here in El Salvador though in reality spendng a couple of nights at the home with the girls has kept me from getting to accustomed to a set schedule. Last week went well overall though I have been battling not feeling the greatest and the return of headaches. I am not sure it comes from dehydration, a change in diet, or migraines. At any rate that part of the week was not so fun. Because I am experimenting with a gluten free diet for a little while, I am back to preparing lots of food and finding new ways to make the foods I love. Pizza is still on the to-do list.

Monday I was able to go on another family visit to a huge coffee plantation where the mother of one of the girls works and lives. We took my car and it made it there though it was eating coolant since the radiator was leaking. The road to get to the plantation was a bit unnerving as one of the staff told the driver to go quickly because it was a street controlled by gangs. We got in and out without problem, but it does put one a bit on the edge.

When I spent the night with the four younger girls on Thursday night, I got to see first hand the getting ready for school routine. I cannot remember what time I had to get up to catch the bus back in elementary school but here they have to be at school at 7:00AM and since there are about 15 girls for 3 bathrooms, the first girls get up at 4:00AM. My girls, who range from 8-10 in age, got up beginning at 5:00AM which still seemed way too early. Unfortunately I made the mistake of getting the slowest girl up last and so she missed breakfast since the van was leaving early and she was just getting out the door. It was a good learning experience for me.

On Saturday we had another family visit day at La Casa de Mi Padre but this time I was not as involved with the program. I took three of the boys who did not have family coming to help me get copies for a house key for one of the families. The original plan was that they were to come along to "protect" me but really just give them a chance to get out. In keeping with the way errands often go, our first two stops at hardware stores were unsuccessful because their machine was broken or no longer there. Thankfully one of the boys remembered where he had gone with one of the house dads for a key in the past and in his few words and with the help of one of the other boys, we ended up at a place where they did indeed copy keys -- all of the time. The rest of the morning I spent sorting through clothes that had been donated to La Casa but did not fit the children. The plan was for the families to take some home.

I have decided that I will be checking out some other churches over the next few weeks, because although the preaching is really good where I have been going, actually meeting people has been difficult. Yesterday I planned to introduce myself to the people beside me but as soon as the service was over, they were out the door. I will try the small group again this week and see how that goes but I do want to look around. Otherwise the week seems as if it will be pretty normal and I am looking forward to having my first full weekend off.

Dia de Amistad

2010-02-14T19:33:00.000-08:00

February 14, 2010

Here in Latin America Valentine's Day is often called "Day of Friendship" (if literally translated). Sometimes they will tack on "And of love." My day began with getting the 4 young girls ready for church but then I left them in the care of other staff while I headed to the English-speaking church in San Salvador.

After church one of the guests at the mission house, Kim, and I drove up to Volcano Bouquern which is about 30 minutes outside of the city. It was a beautiful drive but in keeping with tradition, I did not really know where I was going and so I drove past the turn off for the volcano. It was not far though and we got to see the other side of the mountain range. The hike at the volcano was very short but we wound about through the gardens and made it as long as possible. I was ecstatic to find Forget-Me-Not flowers -- one of my favorites.

Just below the little park there were lots of vendors with drinks, souvenirs, flowers and produce. I bought some berries (similar to raspberries) and also a cluster of Calla lilies. In the US Calla lilies are very expensive, but here for a dollar you would leave with a whole cluster.

From the park we drove back the way that we had come (when we first missed the park) and visited a cafe that boasted coffee which had been shade-grown near there. It was a neat spot, though a little too crowded. As we were leaving there was live music beginning.

On the drive back to the mission house, I was determined to find a new way home and since it was still daylight, it seemed safe enough to do. Much to my dismay though I ended up in the town of Santa Tecla which has haunted me since my first day here. The traffic was about as bad as it had been that day (that was the day when my friends and I got lost there as we tried to find a place to eat dinner). Since that day I have discovered nearly all roads lead to Santa Tecla. Amazingly I did come out where I had hoped to and would have probably made it to the house by a completely different route had I not decided to follow the instructions of a security guard at the grocery store who directed me by a road that I was not sure was right, but I followed anyway. We could have gotten completely lost but thankfully the road did come out near where I work. At any rate I am excited to have some new options now for travel around San Salvador.

On a side note, I have been enjoying seeing once again what a small world it is. Kim is from Catonsville, just outside of Baltimore, and the first day that she arrived we discovered that she had been to Black Rock Retreat for Outdoor Education with her Christian school, many years ago (before my time there). But then it also turns out that she goes to a church which has a school who still goes to Black Rock and I know several of the teachers. I love making random connections halfway around the world.

The Live-In Aunt Experience

2010-02-14T19:18:00.000-08:00

February 14, 2010

Yesterday I saw a whole new side of the work at La Casa de Mi Padre as I had the experience of staying at the girls overnight to watch four of the younger girls. When I arrived Saturday morning the girls were excited to have me there -- their new "Tia." I quickly pulled out my Dutch Blitz cards and taught them a modified version since I felt like at their age all of the rules might be too much. After about an hour and a half (a long time for 7-10 year olds) they had had enough and moved to watching television -- something that they are only allowed to do on weekends.

I was amused by one of slightly older girls who had taken it upon herself to kill a cockroach that was hiding amongst some t-shirts that had been donated to the home. She would lift each one up with the small, plastic baseball bat and say (in Spanish of course), "No cockroach, no cockroach" until she would find it, at which point she would begin to attack it (or the box) with the bat. Several other girls tried to help with smaller weapons but they were not nearly so dramatic.

After lunch I went with two of my girls and quite a few other children to a nearby recreational complex where a couple of people from the community had volunteered to give them some training in soccer. It was fun to watch the young girls learning the ball handling skills and laughing in the process.

The rest of the afternoon was spent watching television, which of course I hate. I worked on somethings that I have been doing and did a little reading. I decided that the next time I am at the home for a weekend, I need to go prepared with more alternative activities available rather than just watching television. Pretzel-making or something in the kitchen would be fun, except that I had the joy of seeing my first El Salvadorean rat there, scurrying under the stove. I was not so excited about the kitchen after that.

Overall the girls behaved pretty well but I did have opportunity to practice the behavior consequence model that is used for discipline because the one little girl was being disobedient and stirring up dissention. I will be with the girls again this coming Thursday so I will get to be part of the weekly school routine. I know that it will be a very early morning since the one bathroom is for 7 girls who all have to shower before school. (And I think that they leave for school around 7:00AM) I am glad that my experience here at La Casa de Mi Padre will be well-rounded when it is all said and done and that I can meet some of the needs that they have, especially during this time when so many of the aunts are doing their vacation in rotation.

Earlier in the week I had the opportunity to do a team building activity with the girls that involved one girl being blind folded and having to listen to the instructions of the "lighthouse" instead of those of the talking rocks who tried to get the "boat" to hit the obstacles. In the debrief after the activity is was so exciting to see the light bulb come on for a couple of them as they saw played out before them the input that they had received in counseling sessions regarding obstacles in their path and how to avoid them. They were quick to recognize that Jesus needs to be the "lighthouse" in our lives. The connections that they made seemed to go much deeper than those of the older boys, just 2 days beforehand.

Immersion

2010-02-11T19:25:00.000-08:00

February 11, 2010

I feel like this week is definitely immersing me in the life and work at La Casa de Mi Padre. Two mornings this week I went out to communities where several of the children's families live to help with the pre-planning for a medical missions team in March. This week I also got to be more involved in one of the group sessions by leading a team building activity. Yesterday I was in charge of a homework group and had the one boy very much testing the limits as I tried to figure out how the groups are run. Once again I found myself helping someone sound words out but it went much better for the 6 year old than it had for the grandmother on Saturday. I found that I had a lot more patience with the little girl too. This Saturday evening I will be taking on the role of a "tia" or aunt and spending the night at the home with four of the younger girls. A lot of the "tios" are on vacation right now and so they are short staffed. I think I will learn a lot by spending the night at the home because I will see how things go round the clock.

The heat and long hours have tired me out by this point in the week and so having a short weekend could be challenging. On Tuesday evening I made it to a small group from the Spanish church that I have gone to twice. It was okay but the guest speaker talked too much and getting home at 10:00PM after being in Spanish all day was too much. I will probably try the group another week after this particular speaker is not there anymore.

And so ends my brief (for me) update on the week.

The First Week

2010-02-08T18:58:00.000-08:00

February 8, 2010

I am now in my second Monday here in El Salvador and though things have been going well, it is hard to hear that in PA yet another snowstorm is on the way and I am missing it. I know that is what I have chosen by living in Central America, but I still miss the joy of the snowfalls and trying to make everyone else smile about the snow even though they "hate" it.

In looking back at last week, my first full week in El Salvador and first week in the Children's home, I would summarize it by saying "A Slow Unfolding." Due to the craziness of life in the home at times (after all 35 children living in one spot will create some surprises), the planned schedule often does not happen as expected. I got to meet the staff and hear about their roles and for some, what brought them to the children's home. There are 2 sets of house parents -- one for the girl's house and the other for the boy's house. Then within each home there are also "tios" or "aunts and uncles" who are in charge of different age groups. It was with two of the tias that I shared coffee one afternoon and heard a bit of their story and how God had led them to La Casa de Mi Padre.

There were various moments when Patty, the psychologist who I am working most closely with, had meetings and so I took the opportunity to spend with the children as they played in the hour or so after finishing their homework. They range in age from 15 months to 20 years old. Tuesday through Friday of each week each tio and the house parents meet with their respective group of children to discuss behavior and other pertinant issues. I was a part of these group sessions and will continue to be with them in the months to come. At some point I will have opportunity to share activities with them that can compliment what is being taught. It will be good to put my camp ministry skills to work. (Actually today I was called upon to figure out the new dog harness since I am into camping. No matter that I am not into dogs all that much. I do not equate camping and dogs as one and the same love, especially big dogs). At this point I am still in the observation process, trying to understand the program, the treatment, and the philosophy. Much training and time is invested in equipping the childcare staff which I see as a very positive thing and I am looking forward to being involved in those events.

It only took the first week to realize that there will be hard days when I will feel the burden of the pain and the wounds that the children are dealing with. As the ministry discovered back when they first began working with the children, just loving them was not enough. They needed to address the hurts and provide a program that would help to bring healing and introduce them to the Healer Himself, Christ Jesus. I, like the children, must leave the pain that I encounter as I get know the children at the feet of Jesus and look to Him for the strength and the words to touch their lives. On my own I am incapable of making any lasting changes in their lives. Only Christ can bring change, but hopefully He can work through me to be His hands and feet.

When You Cannot Turn Left...

2010-02-07T20:06:00.000-08:00

February 7, 2010

Who ever knew that turning left was so important? Being left-handed, I do know the importance of "left" but today I realized anew just how complicated life (particularly driving) is when no left turns are allowed. I was planning to visit an English-speaking church this morning in an effort to meet new people and so I set out with over 30 minutes to find my there. I figured that really it should only take me about 10-15 minutes to get there but I also knew that I would not end up taking the most direct route. How very true!

One of the challenges with driving in San Salvador is that on many of the roads there are no left turns. And when you try to take the next right and go around the block, one often discovers that it was not really a block and you do not end up where planned. Such was my experience this morning. It also does not help when you are driving and need to read the map at the same time. I knew more or less where the church was but I could not turn left to get there and I found myself farther and farther away. I discovered too that not all of the road names match up with the map and so I passed the road I wanted because it had a different name. I planned the time well though because I arrived at the church with a few minutes to spare. But when I asked the guard where I should park he said that everyone was headed to the beach for a baptism. I was in black dress pants and sandals -- not at all beach attire, and so I decided to save the visit for another day and drove to the church I had visited last week. Sadly, as I left the English church I realized that even with knowing its exact location, I may not be able to return there on a direct route because I do not yet know the secrets of where I can turn left.

And with that I conclude this post and the day. I am putting off a more informative post of this past week until another day because it has gotten too late (and not because I was watching the Superbowl).

Reflections

2010-02-07T06:34:00.001-08:00

February 6, 2010

Before I write about the week (hopefully later today) I wanted to take a moment to reflect on two lessons the Lord challenged me with so far this weekend. Yesterday morning I was at La Casa de Mi Padre helping with the Family Day that occurs every two weeks. Family members of the children come to the home to see their children, receive counseling,and/or participate in a literacy class. There is also a devotional time and lunch for all who come. I ended up being in the literacy class and sat with one woman (I would imagine her to have been at least in her mid-50's), helping her sound out letters and even recognize them. We spent the whole time on sounds like ma, me, mi, mo, and mu. Just when I thought she had gotten the sound, we would move on to the next two letters and she would repeat the sound we had just done.

As I sat there trying to help her, my thoughts were, "I am not cut out for this kind of teaching." "I do not have patience for this." And, "Ahhh... not again!" Internally I was battling my impatience and praying that this was not to be the method in which God works on patience in my own life in this coming year. Then the thought struck me, I wonder how God feels when time after time after time, I keep making the same mistakes. How does He feel when I just do not get it nor understand what He is trying to teach me? Thankfully He is patient and loving and He has not given up on me. I wanted to give up yesterday and say forget it to the teaching, but as I thought about God's work in my life and His patience with me, I received encouragement and strength to stay with the woman and help her try to learn the letters and sounds. And my prayer too after yesterday's experience is that I will get and accept what God is teaching me. I do not want to hear from Him and then walk away and forget it.

This morning I had another experience that made me think (I will never tire of analogies I fear). Yesterday there had been a note under the door saying something about the park being in poor condition and so no one was to use the fields/courts etc.... From my understanding of the note, it did not say that I could not run there, but I was not sure. So this morning I headed up the stairs to enter the park and stopped because the gate was closed -- something that has never happened before. I inwardly groaned because I envisioned the worst -- it was locked and I would have no place to exercise. I almost just turned around and went home but I decided to go and see if it was actually locked. It was not and so I entered and did my running/stair climbing. As I ran I thought about that closed door. It was an obstacle in my path because it had not been there before and in light of the note, I thought it meant the park was off limits. And so I was tempted to just turn around and give up. I realized that often in life I do the same thing. I encounter an obstacle in my path or a seemingly closed door, and I want to just give up. But sometimes I think that God wants to see if I will persevere and push forward, not allowing obstacles nor circumstances to hinder me from following His call. (not always because there are moments when God has a door closed and locked and I should not try to enter) With our muscles they get stronger when they face resistance and have to lift more weight than previously. And so I need to be careful not to just turn and run or give up the moment something does not seem to be going quite right. I need to first investigate and ask the Lord what He wants -- is the door locked or just temporarily closed? Is it an obstacle in my path so that I go in a different direction or does God want to see if I am willing to follow and obey Him even when the going gets tough? And so those are my reflections.

Adjusting

2010-02-04T18:39:00.000-08:00

February 4, 2010

It is not even 9:00PM and I am quite exhausted. Today was the first day of hot weather (and it was still nothing compared to what it will be like in a month or so) and I think it wiped me out. I did not have a particularly hard or draining day, so I think the tiredness must be do the weather. And perhaps due in part to the effort it takes to adjust to a new place, new people, immersion in Spanish once again,and a new schedule (which varies from day to day).

For the moment I will simply give a brief overview of the week which is still far from over because Saturday is day when the families visit the children's home and I will participate in the events of the day. During the past couple of days I have had opportunity to hear the stories of various staff from La Casa de Mi Padre and get to know them a bit. As of this evening I have also met all of the children though I am a long way from remembering the name with the face. This evening in a group session with the older teenage girls I caught a glimpse of the work that this ministry has been doing over the past few years. One of the girls shared an experience she had had that day which was sharing Christ with a classmate and bringing to her various verses and ideas to help her in her present state. As she shared her story, I could tell that the experience had been a huge step for her because of her own fear. But she had stepped out and shared the very things that she has been learning these past few years. All of the other girls seemed to be excited for her step. I was encouraged and I look forward to seeing and being a part of the many other ways that God is at work in the children here at La Casa de Mi Padre.

Settling In

2010-01-30T18:23:00.000-08:00

January 30, 2010

The past two days I have been trying to settle in here in San Salvador. That meant finding a grocery store which carried baking soda and not just baking powder. It meant finding an ATM to use. Figuring my way around at least my side of the city was another part of my task. I discovered this evening that I also need to figure out when rush hour is. I thought that 6:30PM on a Saturday would not be a bad time to run out, but traffic was worse than I had seen it yet. I had to love the honking of the cars around me when there was absolutely nothing that anyone could do to move forward.

I also settled into the Mission House where I am staying (see the photos above). For the most part I will have the entire house to myself but about once a month there will be a mission team staying here. Some work with La Casa de Mi Padre and others work with various ministries around the city. For me I think it will be a good balance of having alone time versus opportunity to visit with others.

Having unpacked all of my clothes, I then set out to iron them and hence get a headstart on the weekend. I am pretty sure I will be working long hours so I wanted to get out of the way whatever work I could during the weekend. I also have beans cooking in preparation for the week.

This morning I went over to the park (also in the photos) to run again and had the opportunity to meet a couple of the neighbors. The community takes care of the park and this man and his wife were out watering the grass. I discovered that there are mango trees, avocado trees, and another type of fruit -- all of which are for the community to enjoy. I am hoping that I can get to know a few of the neighbors over the next couple of weeks. Every time I make a lap around the park, I look with longing towards the road on the other side of the fence because I know that running on a few of the roads in the neighborhood would give me some variety to my run. But as I talked with my neighbor his recommendation was to stick with the park. And so I guess I will follow the recommendations of two people now and continue to run in circles.

Arrived

2010-01-29T07:26:00.000-08:00

January 29, 2010

As you can tell I am very behind in my posts so this will be a long one. Last week I spent the week in Honduras wrapping up some details at the camp there and reconnecting with the staff, attempting to see people in the city as well. This past Sunday and Monday I had plans to visit with several Honduran friends in San Pedro Sula but in the end all of the plans fell through and I did none of what I had hoped and planned. I was able to see quite a few people at church though so that was good. My friend Emily was in the city already so were able to run errands and to hang out some that Monday before heading to the airport to pick up another friend, Justin.

From the airport we headed to camp which is actually on the way to El Salvador and stayed the night there. I was able to play one last soccer game with the staff and camp kids and also get in my goodbyes to the people there. My heart hurts for little Lisbeth because at her age it has to be so difficult to understand and say goodbye to people time and again. I was a part of her life nearly daily for 7 months and then I left for several months, only to return for a week, leave again, be back for a week and now leave yet again. She definitely seemed to understand that I was leaving again and did not want to have much to do with me as I tried to say goodbye. I am thankful that she and Evelyn have the consistency of staying on camp and having some family around. Hopefully it will help to make up for the losses of other people who have been in and out of her life.

Tuesday morning, Emily, Justin, and I began the journey to El Salvador. I had heard mixed reports on how the drive could be and the border crossing. We were surprised when all the border patrol did was look at our passports and then wave us on. There was no checking of the documents of my vehicle or anything. We stopped and went in just to make sure that we were not missing anything. I still need to figure out what this means for me keeping my car in El Salvador and if I need to register it here or drive it out of the country every 90 days or what. Hopefully that is something I can work on this weekend.

The drive took about 6 hours which was what we had expected. We had no map though so as we neared the city I called one of the staff members at La Casa de Mi Padre to find out how to get to the Multiplaza Mall where we were to meet up. I have since discovered that I am not very good with taking directions from people via the phone. We ended up driving through downtown San Salvador and after passing a different mall several times, decided to stop and wait there.

We went in and I bought a new chip for my cell phone so that I could make calls in El Salvador, and then we waited for the guy to come and find us. I since learned that the mall we stopped at is not a recommended mall to visit. It is suggested that you do not carry a purse and that you have a pocket ready with money to hand over should you get held up. Perhaps the ignorance was bliss because I was not too worried as we walked around. I did realize God's faithfulness though because on Wednesday evening we discovered that the back door to my Rodeo was not locking(the control box for the windows and door locks was changed last week and now everything is in reverse). So the car was sitting loaded down with stuff, computers, etc... in an unsafe parking lot and yet no one tried to break in.

We finally reached the Mission house where we were staying and where I plan to live for the year. There is a little park next door where I can sort of run or if nothing else get exercise. It only takes a little over a minute to lap around the whole park and half of it is stairs. Basically it will take a lot of laps for a 30 minute workout. This morning I ran there for the first time but combined it with a little shooting of hoops. I am thankful to have a green area next door and to not have to try and find a gym to go to for exercise.

Later Tuesday evening we went out to get something to eat and ended up circling the entire city just to get to a mall that was actually rather close. (And this time I had gotten the directions in person so maybe my problem is with directions however they come -- whether in person or on the phone). Getting home was slightly quicker but still not direct.

Wednesday we stopped in at La Casa de Mi Padre in the morning and then drove to the beach which is only about 45 minutes away. Well, it is supposed to be but I could not remember exactly where I had been before so we took the scenic route and had to backtrack. Just as I remembered from my trip there in October, the waves were big. I later found out that San Blas, where we were, is a surfer's beach. I did venture out farther than I normally do with hopes of riding a wave in. Instead I got so battered by the waves that I decided to just head back in. I have not gotten the technique down of diving into the waves instead of being crushed by them. As I was under the one wave I realized that I was not coming up very quickly, and I suddenly understood how easy it could be to panic and get worn out by the waves. I was very tired by the time I got to shore. The experience gave me a whole new perspective of Ps. 42:7, "Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfall; all your waves and breakers have swept over me." I remember reading those verses in Costa Rica at a beach and thinking more of diving into the depths of God's love, no matter what risks that seemed to involve. But this time I saw the waves as the psalmist seems to, the trials and challenges of life that can come upon us successively and wear us down. The psalmist goes on to speak of how God is with him. In the day God's love directs him and at night His song is with him. He says of God "my Rock." And how true it is. God is the Rock, the firm foundation that we can stand on even as the waves roll in and pound.

Yesterday I took Emily and Justin to the airport and somehow managed to get home and to several other places without getting lost. I know that I will get lost many more times in the coming days because San Salvador is a big city and I am not familiar with it. Today I hope to get some more info on whether I can fix my locks so that the whole car locks when I hit the control button. If nothing else though, someone did figure out yesterday that if I lock the back door with the key it stays locked no matter what I do with the control buttons. So I feel much safer.

Monday I will begin at La Casa de Mi Padre and I am looking forward to it. I was there for a little while yesterday and had lunch with several of the staff and today visited with a few of the chidren there. It seems like it will be a good group of people to work with. I know that I will learn a lot and I hope to be able to lighten the load of some of them because I know that they put in long hours. I am excited for what God will do in and through me in the coming months and for whatever adventures lie ahead with that.

2010-01-18T09:59:00.000-08:00

January 18, 2010

Little did I know that a simple soccer game played in a small town in Honduras could be such a cross cultural experience. Apparently nearly five months (though not without a return trip) outside of Honduras was enough to allow me to experience some culture shock in my return her. Let me try to paint a picture of yesterday's soccer game.

Picture a small town, set in the countryside, just below the mountains. There is one paved street that runs through the center of town. This is Pinalejo. Like every small town in Honduras, Pinalejo has its soccer fields. The soccer fields are used almost exclusively for "futbol" (soccer) unlike the basketball court which becomes both a place to play soccer and a place to dry coffee beans. These fields are littered with trash and cow patties, the latter of which you try to avoid when running around.

Yesterday I joined my friend Evelin and her team in a game against another local team, the latter of which was composed of primarily high school age girls. I was given a uniform and the opportunity to jump in the game, no questions asked. The first real culture shock came when I approached the goal my team was trying to score in. There was no net to stop the ball which is a non-essential anyway. The distracting part was that no less than a dozen persons stood within the goal posts (some even leaning on the front posts)watching the game. There was no concern that an attempted goal might hit one of them in the face. I suppose that they were all prepared and alert. (At least I would hope so). Nonetheless there is something a bit awkward with shooting at a dozen people, among whom the goalie blends in. Boundary lines were non-existent but somehow the referee knew when to blow the whistle. I certainly did not know when to stop running.

I really am not that great a soccer player but I know how to run and so I ran and had wonderfull missed shots on goal. I prefer to pass rather than shoot which probably frustrated the majority of players who are more accustomed to the latter. Supposedly the two halves of the game were 45 minutes but the coach seemed think that the ref was not actually keeping time. It seemed that way to me, both as I played and then stood on the sideline. The team I played with won 8-0. We definitely had more passion for the game and quite a few of the girls had some good skills. At one point I saw one of the other team's players looking at her cell phone, hopefully only reading a text message and not sending one, during the middle of the game.

I enjoyed the game and the opportunity to see a bit of the life in Pinalejo that I had not glimpsed before when I was in Honduras. Though there were differences in the structure of the game and the rules, the heart of the game of soccer in Honduras is the same. I was honored to be able to step into their world for a few moments and participate with them.

Adjusting

2010-01-16T20:10:00.000-08:00

January 16, 2010

Here I am in Honduras getting reacquainted with some of the joys and challenges. I awoke this morning at 6:00AM to the sound of Spanish over a loud system and I could not remember where I was – as in which country. Then I remembered it was the weekend and there is a group on camp. I have been excited that the temperatures are not as hot as some times and so going from a PA winter to the tropics is not so bad. It is still hard to remember that last week I was playing ice hockey on a frozen pond. This week the only thing I have been hitting at (with a mop, not a hockey stick) are giant ants which swarmed the kitchen.

Yesterday morning I headed to my mechanic to pick up my car. For the most part everything was working except that I now cannot put down my driver’s side window – before it was just all of the others that I was not able to control from my seat. I hope to get the window fixed before heading to El Salvador because anytime I pass through either a toll or police checkpoint, I will have to open my door instead of the window. It could be quite inconvenient at times. If an electrical shop cannot fix the problem, I will have to try and quickly order the part so that it can come down with one of my friends.

When I arrived at camp yesterday afternoon, there was no electric but thankfully it did come on in time for me to put my groceries in the fridge. I then headed down to Pinalejo with Evelin and several of the younger children on camp so that I could join Evelin’s soccer team in their practice. It looks as if I will be playing on their team tomorrow afternoon. Soon volleyball will be the only sport left in which I have not played on a team in Honduras (of the most common sports that is).

My other main challenge of the day was cooking. I went to town in the morning to buy a new chimbo (tank) of gas for the stove and planned to put a chicken in the oven to bake. That way I would not have to touch it much until after it was cooked. I hate the slime of chicken skin and parts so as little contact as I have with it, the better. Well, I turned the oven on to preheat and soon the smell of gas was overwhelming. Several people tried to help me fix the connection so that it would not leak and it was better but I could still hear gas escaping. I cooked the chicken for a while and then decided the gas would have to be turned on too long to bake it and so I pulled it out, cut it up and cooked it on the stovetop. What a mess! I suppose that the oven not working so well might help me to not do so much baking and thereby focus on more important things, such as people. In reality sharing baked goods with people is no substitute for sitting down and talking with people.

And that sums up the events, more or less, of two days back in Honduras. Oops, not quite. I was in bed ready to turn off the light when I noticed a block spot up on the wall -- a scorpion. And so I went downstairs in search of something to knock it down with and then set out to kill it, which I hate to do, though mostly because of the gore. And then I slept, without nightmares of scorpions.

A Day of Snowflakes Vs. Snow Flurries

2010-01-14T15:03:00.000-08:00

January 14, 2010

I know that I should not be starting an entry on snow from the Miami airport, but though the topic has been brewing in my head for weeks, I have not made the time to record it. Airports are good for that sort of thing.

About two weeks ago now, I looked outside the window one afternoon and saw lots of flurries blowing around. A few days later I drove through a light snow early one morning where the snow came down steadily enough that they settled down. When I watched the flurries blowing aimlessly around, never really finding a place to land or rest, I realized that I did not want to be like a snow flurry. They seem to lack purpose and just drift. There are never enough to accumulate and transform their environment. That is where the snowflakes (or really a day with snow shower) are different.

The snowflakes do blow around and as you are driving into the oncoming snow, you see just how much the wind directs them. And yet they land. They stick together. They turn a dirty, cold world into a beautiful place. They reflect the sunlight and at times even seem to sparkle. They bring transformation. I want to be snowflake. I want to be a vessel through which God transforms those around me because He is in me and is continuing to transform me.

Fare Thee Well

2010-01-13T10:49:00.000-08:00

January 13, 2010

Today is departure day. Departure from family, the winter, friends, sports, and in many ways comfort. But today is also a new day and a day of beginnings. Beginning on a journey that I cannot see the ending to. The beginning of heading to a new country and settling down there for a year. The beginning of a new area of ministry -- exploring the field of counseling and intentional work with children and their families. And so the day carries mixed emotions.

Up until last night excitement was the emotion that most coursed through my body. I was ready to move forward and past the season of waiting. I was ready begin the new journey. Then last evening I held my little nephew and realized just how much he will change in the next 3 months to a year (depending on how much time elapses before I pass through PA again). Reality hit home as to all that I am leaving behind in Lancaster and with that the sadness came.

And yet today as I left, the excitement was there again -- just more tempered than before. I know that God has plans for me that require this new step forward even though there is pain in the letting go. He has been faithful in the past and will be faithful again to sustain me.

Tonight I arrive in Miami and will visit with the LAM headquarters tomorrow before flying out in the evening for Honduras. Then I will have almost twelve days in Honduras before driving to El Salvador. Thankfully many of the details for El Salvador are coming together and I should have a place to live. I have friends to do the drive with me and I am working on getting all of the papers I need for residency since the leaving the country every 90 days might not work if the government starts issuing only a 30 day tourist visa.

The journey has begun and I bid a fare thee well to all those I had the pleasure of connecting with during my time in the United States and to those who I was not able to see though I had hoped our paths would cross.

A Bit Disconcerting

2010-01-13T10:34:00.000-08:00

January 13, 2010

Catch up time on blogs so here come a bunch of entries that I have wanted to write for some time. Last Friday afternoon I parked in downtown Lancaster and walked over to market to try and connect with someone about selling jewelry from Honduras. As I turned onto Orange St. and headed north towards Prince St., I noticed several cops on foot walking towards me. On the other side of the street there more more policemen and policewomen looking around as they walked along the sidewalk. Farther up the street more policemen scanned the roads and avenues, and I began to wonder who they were looking for and just what the person had down. I walked past the officers and rounded Prince, only to see a police car go by and then more police ahead. I was glad to get inside at the Prince Street Cafe and leave behind whatever was brewing on the streets of Lancaster. My conversation only lasted a few minutes though and I was back on the streets. As I walked quickly back to my car, well aware of my surroundings (and the fact that the police were still on the streets), my imagination ran away with the possibilities of what could happen if someone suddenly ran out with a gun right by where I was standing.

Thankfully nothing happened and hopefully the police found whoever they were looking for, but I did find the situation a bit disconcerting -- having never needed to be so aware of my surroundings in Lancaster. I expect it in Honduras or El Salvador but not so much in my hometown.

The Countdown

2010-01-04T15:06:00.000-08:00

January 4, 2010

The countdown for 2010 is seemingly long past (4 days ago seems like ages ago), but the countdown for my departure for Honduras and then El Salvador is still running. Today I was able to confirm my meetings in Miami with Latin America Mission and so I bought my ticket for leaving PA next Wednesday. I am excited to be going and to see what all God has planne for me in the coming year. I sense that it will be a year of growing and refining as I am stretched by taking on new responsibilities and stepping out into new areas.

I will have a little over a week in Honduras before leaving for El Salvador on the 26th of January. As of now I have no idea where I will actually be living in San Salvador and am waiting to hear about apartment options. I think the first few weeks could be interesting and certainly not boring. I am looking forward to having some time to reconnect with friends in Honduras, use my Spanish again, and organize a few things at camp yet.

I cannot help but hope for one last snowstorm before I leave or if not that, then ice on the ponds for skating. Winter sports are still rare enough in my life that I love them. If I live to be 90 or 100, I hope to still be throwing snowballs at the least but preferably sledding, cross country skiing, and ice skating. One can dream...

Learning from the Little Children

2009-12-24T07:56:00.000-08:00

December 22, 2009

Little children – they have so much to teach us. The past 2-3 weeks I have had more opportunity than usual to hang out with young children and I learned a lot. I discovered just how off their sense of time is. One four year old who I put down or a nap said she would probably sleep for 3 hours or so (after I told her that she needed to be in her bed for half an hour). When I went in to check on her half an hour later, she was up and playing with her toys. Apparently the “three hours” had passed quickly. My nephew is still too young to say anything, but he knows how to smile and delight his family.

I have also spent a few days at Mom’s House, an outreach to single moms in Lancaster. They were short-staffed several days and so I helped out in the toddler room. I had fun reading with them and watching them run circles in the playground area in the middle of the winter cold. One little girl of about 18 months would continually fall over but it did not daunt her. She picked herself up and ran again, smiling all the while. They delighted in seeing the birds fly overhead and roost in nearby trees.